- "Won't somebody please think of the children?"
- ―Helen Lovejoy's catchphrase
| Helen Lovejoy
| Character Information
Little is known about Helen Lovejoy's childhood. It is known, however, that she attended a camp with Marge when she was 10. She was punished by having a fork stuck in her hand because she could not remember which out of 34 forks was an olive fork. It is hinted that she was punished in this manner many times. She used to sell cosmetics, but her husband asked her to quit because she was making more money than he was.
Helen Lovejoy has large, slanted eyes with long lashes. She usually wears a pink sweater, with a light blue shirt underneath, a blue skirt, and plain black shoes. She used to have brown hair, then changed it to red, and then gray.
Helen is the wife of Rev. Timothy Lovejoy and the mother of Jessica Lovejoy. She is a judgemental, small-minded, moralistic person and the typical town gossip. She thinks she can win by finding out secrets, and people joining her alliance so that she won't reveal their secrets. She introduces herself as "the gossipy wife of the minister"; when she has nothing else to gossip about, she resorts to telling secrets about her own personal life. She is part of a gang of housewives, containing herself, Luann, Agnes and ex-members Marge and Maude in which they sponsor and invest in companies and boxers.
Her moral convictions look to always defend the interests of the minors, which explains her famous catchphrase, delivered in times of civic crisis (moral or otherwise), "Will someone please think of the children?".
Helen is also openly conservative, and was seen at the Republican Headquarters located at a haunting location.
Marge and Helen have a frenemy relationship. Helen is known to share gossip with Marge, but spreads gossip about Marge as well. Helen has been known to mock Marge's cooking. Marge retaliated by putting Maggie's ear medicine in her food first. She once had a furious fight with Marge over the last box of raisins, and the fight ended with Helen being taken to the hospital. However, she later rushed towards Marge saying she had some juicy gossip, only to be told "tell me later" while Marge pushes her away (Although in that particular case, it was namely because Marge had to rush to get home before her kids got home due to being due to taking them to the dentist). Helen has a rivalry or a dislike of Marge Simpson. Marge dislikes Helen for being the main reason she can't find friends. Helen often tries to tangle with Homer and Marge's marriage. Helen spies on Marge having brunch with Jacques and attempts to talk to her for gossip on the issue. However, although there is tension between the two wives, it is said that Helen is Lisa's Godmother. This, however, is said during a halloween special and is therefore considered non-canonical.
Helen and Timothy have a stronger marriage than many other Springfieldians (save for Ned and Maude, and probably Dr. Hibbert). Many couples turned to divorce (Kirk and Luann Van Houten) or consistently argue, bear many kids, and have trouble with money (Cletus and Brandine Spuckler). However, Helen is somewhat patient of Timothy. Once Timothy spends more time on his own and slowly loses his mind, but Helen remains patient, but instead becomes worried. Helen once mentions her mother is going to visit them and Timothy makes an insult saying that after Helen's father died, her mother visits them too much. However, once when her daughter, Jessica Lovejoy, was running down the field to shoot a soccer goal, Helen screamed "Do it, sweetie! Save our troubled marriage!"
The Simpsons: Tapped Out
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Behind the Laughter