Krusty the Clown
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"Hey hey!" -Krusty's catch phrase
Herschel Pinkes Remochel Krustofski
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Character Information
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Krusty the Clown, or Herschel Krustofski (full name: Herschel Pinkes Remochel Krustofski), is voiced by Dan Castellaneta. Krusty is the long-time clown host of Bart and Lisa's favourite TV show. The TV show is a combination of kiddie variety-television hijinks with a sidekick, and cartoons (including the Tom and Jerry parody Itchy and Scratchy). His sidekick Sideshow Bob, has been replaced by Sideshow Mel. Another sidekick was Sideshow Raheem who was an angry young man, but no evidence exists to show if Sideshow Bob was a replacement for Sideshow Raheem.The character of Krusty was partially inspired by real-life clown "Rusty Nails" whom Simpsons creator Matt Groening watched as a child while growing up in Portland, Oregon. Some of his biographical details echo those of comedian Jackie Mason, who voices Krusty's father, including being the son of an orthodox rabbi, and being temporarily banned from television due to a controversial performance.
Biography
The episode "Like Father, Like Clown" (based on the film The Jazz Singer), first released on October 24, 1991, expanded on his origin. According to it, he was born Herschel Schmoeckel Krustofsky and is of Jewish heritage. Krusty is a third generation American. In 1902, Krusty's grandfather Zed Krustofski left Imperial Russia for the United States and gained entry through Ellis Island. His son Hyman Krustofsky became an Orthodox rabbi and a leader of his community, whose wise counsel is continually sought. Rabbi Krustofsky, voiced by Jackie Mason, hoped that his son would follow in his footsteps (he brags that Herschel is on top of his Yeshiva class). However, Herschel wanted to become a clown because he wanted to make people laugh. Consequently, the Rabbi disowned him. Decades later, Krusty memorably reconciled with his father with the assistance of Bart and Lisa.
It was later revealed Krusty did not have a Bar Mitzvah ceremony, because Hyman feared he would violate the sanctity of the rites by "acting up." Krusty had two adult Bar Mitzvah ceremonies: a Hollywood gala, then a simple ceremony intended to reconnect with his father.
After leaving New York, Krusty started his 50-year show biz career as a street mime in Tupelo, Mississippi. He then appeared on a variety of Laugh-In style variety shows, but in the 1950s was banned from television for 10 years after saying "pants" on the air, which was not allowed at the time. In the 1960s he finally got his own television show, The Krusty the Klown Show, which featured Krusty discussing current events with serious guests (an episode of the show dated February 6, 1961 featured AFL-CIO president George Meany and a discussion of the "labor crisis in America"). The interview format got increasingly wacky, and by the 1980s the show had devolved into a children's entertainment show.
Krusty quickly became a multi-millionaire – mostly by mass marketing his name and image to a variety of suspect products and services. In the Simpsons' world, there are everything from Krusty alarm clocks, to Krusty dolls, to Krusty eye wash, and Krusty Klown Kollege (which Homer attended), many of which are owned by Bart. The more dangerous ones include: the Krusty home pregnancy test, which "may cause birth defects"; Krusty's brand of bubble gum, which contains spider eggs (which they knew about) and hantavirus (which they didn't know about); and Krusty's brand of cereal, which in one episode has a boast on the box first for a jagged metal Krusty-O in each box, and then flesh-eating bacteria in each box. There is only one lawsuit to date regarding these products, the time that Bart ate a jagged metal Krusty-O and had to have his appendix removed. However, it was suggested at the end of the episode that he would sue Krusty again after he ingested the flesh-eating bacteria that was put into the cereal. At one time, he had his own brand of Pork Products. This might have lead to his almost fatal on-the-air heart attack. There is a list of Krusty related products at the end of this page. Krusty also operates his own television production company, Krustylu Productions (a pun on Lucille Ball and her husband Desi Arnaz's Desilu Productions).
His much-abused sidekick, Sideshow Bob, framed him for armed robbery – which resulted in Krusty's brief incarceration. In the interim, Bob ran the show, but was fired when he was identified as the real culprit.
Krusty is a hard-living entertainment veteran who has been down and out several times (always being rescued by the Simpson children) and remains addicted to cigarettes and alcohol (and, in one episode, Percodan). He seems to suffer from bipolar disorder, and, in a Soupy Sales parody, asked children to send him spare lithium from their parent's medicine cabinets after the nuclear power plant cut off its perscription drug plan. In "The Heart-Broke Kid" he says that his tolerance levels are so high from years of excess he has to smoke ground-up moon rocks to get high.
His show was canceled once after the debut of Gabbo the ventriloquist dummy, who was so popular Krusty was driven out of business. Bart managed to get the Gabbo show cancelled when he sneaked into the studio and switched on the camera during what was supposed to be a commercial break, revealing ventriloquist Arthur Crandall saying "All the children in Springfield are S.O.B.s" through Gabbo. A comeback special for Krusty was ultimately held (Parody of the Elvis comeback special), in which Krusty's many Hollywood friends bailed him out.
In 1996, after an IRS bust for tax avoidance, which resulted in his bankruptcy, Krusty faked his death and lived briefly as sailor Rory B. Bellows. Krusty insured Bellows's life in his own name and then staged an accident to "kill" Bellows, collecting the money to rebuild his life.
He seems to retire from and then get back into showbiz repeatedly throughout his career. His last retirement was almost a permanent one because of recently-paroled Sideshow Bob's latest scheme – wiring plastique explosives to a hypnotized Bart and sending him up on stage. However, a last minute change of heart at Krusty's touching mention of him in a speech waylaid Bob's plan (as well as a last-minute rescue by Krusty's chain smoking chimp, Mr. Teeny).
Krusty – minus his trademark clown-hair, pale "facepaint" and red nose – bears an uncanny physical resemblance to Homer Simpson. However, there also differences such as his cow-skull birthmark, his superfluous third nipple, and his small feet. Krusty, like Homer, apparently has faced heart problems in the past as he currently has an artificial rather than a natural cardiac pacemaker. The pacemaker has since permanently made his face white.
Recent history
It has been noted that Krusty was supposedly illiterate in "Krusty Gets Busted" (first released on April 29, 1990), where Sideshow Bob framed him for armed robbery. He has since been seen reading with varying ability (many fans have noted that in the episode "Lisa's First Word", he is shown reading a wire service article in 1983). Through his unnamed mother, Krusty is supposedly an older half-brother to actor Luke Perry. His only other known relatives are his father, his grandfather, and his illegitimate daughter Sophie, (voiced by actress Drew Barrymore. Introduced in the episode "Insane Clown Poppy" (first released on November 12, 2000), Sophie is the result of an affair between Krusty and a female soldier during the Gulf War. Sophie seeks out Krusty, although her mother has developed a bitter hatred of clowns and displays it with her choice of artwork (which depict violence being done to clowns).
Krusty's profligate spending has resulted in encounters with the local Mafia, not to mention schemes such as running a clown college to turn out proxy Krustys to appear at birthday parties, and running a concentration camp-like summer camp called "Kamp Krusty". He willingly sells out to commercial interests to sell all manner of second-rate goods – he even has a generic spoken endorsement: "I heartily endorse this event or product!". His lack of care towards the quality of his merchandising is evidenced by the little attention he pays to the names of events he stars in: his Christmas show, "Krusty Kinda Kristmas"; his TV special, "Krusty Komedy Klassics"; and a tennis tournament he sponsored, the "Krusty Kharity Klassic" all use the unfortunate acrostic "KKK" (as in Ku Klux Klan). Unfortunately, the only instance of this he notices is the TV special, and that was only because the initials are shown behind him. In a hindsighted booking decision, Krusty was live at the Apollo Theater at the time.
In 2003, Krusty was elected to the United States House of Representatives as a Republican (though he once joked of voting for Bill Clinton in 1992 whilst campaigning for the GOP). A year later, he served on a House committee to investigate Ziffcorp – run by one Artie Ziff until he lost 98% of the company to Homer for corporate malfeasance. Apparently back in showbiz (despite having retired several times), he balances a political career with his local cable shenanigans.
Quotes
During a marathon TV performance "Now kids, let's go and see Sideshow Mel for some more of his legal, over the counter wake-up drugs!"
BART: The Krusty I know didn't get where he is today by giving up! KRUSTY: No, I got where I am today by naming names in the '50s.
During an 'adult' stand-up performance "Let's talk about herpes! Herpes, boberpies, banana-fanna-fo-ferbes, herpes!"
"Uh...I could pull a better cartoon out of my a-- ah he he he he. Hey! Wow! Wasn't that great kids!"
"The fercockta doors are stuck! Don't just stare, Arte, help me!" (Krusty's ill-fated appearance on Laugh-In forty years ago)
"The Academy hates me. Don't know why. Bunch of old know-nothing dinosaurs wouldn't know talent if it bit them in the..." (does his trademark laugh).
KRUSTY: "Ohh, sex chat!" (Dials the number, and is connected with four other guys who dialed the number at about the same time.) APU: "Hello?" KRUSTY: "Hello?" APU: "Are you a beautiful woman?" KRUSTY: "Do I sound like a beautiful woman?" APU: "This is not as hot a party as I had anticipated."
MRS. FLANDERS: "We're not talking about love, we're talking about S-E-X in front of the C-H-I-L-D-R-E-N!" KRUSTY: "Sex Cauldron? I thought they closed that place down!"
Krusty products
Krusty has endorsed many products and places that are named after him. Here is a partial list.
- Krusty Brand Seal of Approval (on everything that meets the "high standards" of Krusty the Clown)
- Krusty the Clown Show
- Krusty's Prime Time Circus of Ratings Special
- Krusty Handguns
- Krusty-Brand Home Pregnancy Test ("May cause birth defects")
- Krusty-Brand Cereal (aka "Krusty-O's")
- Krusty-Brand Imitation Gruel (9 out of 10 orphans can't tell the difference)
- Extra-Frosted Krusty Flakes
- Chocolate Frosted Frosty Krusty Flakes ("Only sugar has more sugar!")
- Extra-Frosted Chocolate-Covered Krusty Flakes
- Krusty-Brand Lo-Cal TV Dinner
- Krusty's Famous Sauce
- Krusty-Brand Low Income Housing
- Krusty Burger (hamburger and fast food establishment)
- Kamp Krusty ("The Krustyist place on earth!")
- Krusty's Klown Kollege
- Krustyland Amusement Park, featuring: The Remarkable Leaky Tugboat, Cactus Patch and the Never-Ending Line
- Euro Krusty Land (Later blew up)
- Mount Splashmore
- Krusty's Non-Narkotik Kough Syrup
- Krusty Brain & Health Tonic
- Krusty-Brand Vitamins
- Krusty Brand Bite-A-Min's Imitation Vitamins
- Krusty Doll
- Krusty the Klown Alarm Klock (Gets extremely hot when plugged in)
- Krusty Calculator
- Krusty Phone
- Krusty Wallclock
- Krusty Bedside Lamp
- Krusty Pencil Tops
- Krusty Lunchboxes
- Krusty Giant Toy Drum
- Krusty's Sulfuric Acid
- Krusty Trash Basket
- Krusty T-Shirts
- Krusty Posters
- Krusty Non-Toxic Kologne
- Krusty's Autobiography (Ghostwritten by John Updike)
- Krusty's Crowd Control Barrier "Krusty Sez 'Get Back'"
- Krusty Slippers
- Lady Krusty Mustache Removal
- Krusty Electric Toothbrush
- Krusty Mini-Basketball Hoops
- Krusty Knife Doll
- Krusty Eye wash
- Krusty Geiger Meter (Shown in the episode where Homer builds a small nuclear reactor. Lisa holds the Krusty Geiger Meter up to it, and the Meter promptly says something along the lines of "Whoah! That things gonna blow! Drop this toy and run!)
- Krusty Home Depot (hardware store)
- Krusty Partially Gelatinated Non-Dairy Gum-Based Beverages (milkshakes)
- Krusty Personal Swabs
- Krusty Brand Endorsement Contract
- Krusty Burger Express (version of Krusty burger but a related buissness(Simpsons Comics issue 107))
- Krustaco Hut (Pizza Hut version of Krusty burger but a related buissness(Simpsons Comics issue 107))
- P.J. Mackrustydoodles (Mc' Donalds version of Krusty burger but a related buissness(Simpsons Comics issue 107))
- Krusty Buns
- Krusty Mustard
- Sideshow Marsh-MEL-lows
- Krusty Soda
- Krusty the Klown Vinylite Grip Steel Tipped Lawn Darts
- Krusty greeting cards
- Krusty Monopoly
- Krusty Fried Chicken
- Krusty Kosher Ham
- Krusty-Brand Pork Products and Pork By-Products
- Canyonero
- Krusty's Multi-phastic Personality Test
- Dr. Krusty Balloon-animal Home Angioplasty Kit
- Krusty's Vita-Glo Radiant Spring Water
- Krusty Brand Atomic Particle Accelerator
- Chef Krusty's Brunch-In-A-Can
- Krusty's All Purpose Religious Biscuits (They're Kosher Too!)
- Le Kruste Burgers - The French version of the Krusty Burger
- The Krusty Brand Fun Factory
- Krusty Krime Klubber 2000
- Krusty Steel Marbel
- Krusty Flakes
- Krusty's Non-Dairy Non-Ice Cream Whey Product Sandwhich
- My Krusty Pony
- Krusty Balloon Animal Sculpting Kit
- Krusty's Kut-Out Klassics DVDs
- Krusty Bobblehead
- Krusty Kards "Collect all 10,000. Hurry my bookie's getting ornery!"
- Krusty Brand Korn Syrup Klusters
- Krusty Baseball Bat
- Krusty Bedsheets
- Krusty Wall Kalendar
- Krusty Brand Space Probe
- Krusty the Klown Duvet
- Krustyburger Laffy Meals
- Krusty Brand Pork Sqeezin's
- Uncle Krusty's Tile, Tub and Tonsil Cleaner
- Krusty's International Thesaurus 1st & 2nd Editions
- Kroon Along with Krusty music album
- KrustyLu Studios
- The country Krustonia
- Telethon for Motion Sickness Charity
- Sideshow Mel's Milk 'n' Cookies in a Carton
- Farmer Krusty's Bacon-flavoured Butter
- Krusticles
- Colonel Krusty's Fried Chicken Parts Dinner with Mystery Cobbler
- Brigadier General Krusty's Salisbury Steak Dinner with Mystery Pudding
- Raj Krusty's Paneer Dinner with Mystery Biryani
- Krustofski Vineyards Bulk Red Wine (not kosher)
- Kap'n Krusty's Chawin' Baccy
- Rancid Green Pork Products "Suitable for Landfills" -a Division of Krusty Brand Pork Products
- Official Krustyland Pencils
- The Leaning Tower of Krusty
- Krusty Dogs
- Super Deluxe Krusty Burger with bacon, chili, cheese and extra Krusty Secret Sauce
- Krusty Secret Sauce
- KrustyCo Inc. - Krusty's parent company
- Krusty's Toy, Novelty, and Industrial Surplus Company
- Huge cardboard City of the Future
- Little Miss Tinkle Fairytown Fun Set
- Krusty's Kids Kharity
- Soy Goy: The Kosher Vegetarian Burger - toppings include avocado & extra sprouts
- Vegetarian Krusty Midway Meal - with free toy
- Krusty Seed Company
- 20 Official Sideshow Mel Used Unicycles
- Krusty's Famous Sauce
- Krustyshake
- Clownion Rings
- Krusty the Clown's "Secrets of Strength" Muscle-Building Booklets
- Mr. Teeny's Monkey Bites
- Krusty's Sugar High Fivettes
- Sideshow Mel's Fruity Cannon Balls
- Candy-Coated Krusty Cajun Crawdads
- Sideshow Bob's Breakfast Options
- Krusty Kreamy-Os
- Krusty Kreamy-Os with Triple Stuff
- Kirk 'N' Krusty Kover the Klassics (magazine or album)
- Krustofski's Kosher Unleavened Donuts
- Krusty Brand Chunk Style Tuna - packed in natural tap water
- Krusty Discount Dashboard Buffet Kit
- Krusty's Talent Karavan
- Krusty's Discount Dungeon Depot
- Krusty Clone at Home Kit
- The Little Miss Springfield Pageant
- The Krusty Komedy Klassic
- Krusty the Clown Walkie Talkies
- Krusty the Klown Action Figures - Talking Sideshow Mel with Removable Bone, Krusty the Klown with Arthritic Grip and Daredevil Krusty.
- Krusty Brand Chicken-Flavoured Soda - You'll love the Fowl Taste!
- Krusty-Bacon Swirlie
- Breaded Butter Pats (topping for Krusty-Bacon Swirlie)
- Clown Size Shake
- Cheese Straw
- Grand Theft Krusty
- Krustenstein Monster Make-Up
- Krustyfingers
- Sideshow Mel bars
- Krusty Calendar
- Krusty Brand Baby Oatmeal - now 38% fewer rat droppings.
- Krusty-Brand Child's Toy Bone - not for use in hair or bone replacement.
- Krusty-Brand Baby's First Skeleton
- Krusty's One Hundred and One Uses for a Cherry Bomb Contest
- Krusty's Kalifornia Experience
- A Krusty Kinda Kristmas - by IDG
- Clown Party Marshmallows
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