Game Over/Quotes
Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
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- [Introduction Cutscene]
- Mr. Sparkle: The dirt has prevailed. I have dishonored my ancestors!
- Bart: The Springfield portal is the only one that's holding. Come on, everyone, back to Springfield!
- Private First Class Burns: Hang on. I'll be right back!
- Morc: For the love of Sauron will ya...aww...
- Morc: Crap.
- Homer: Ohh! Well, I'm glad that's over. What's for dinner, Marge?
- Mario: I hope-a it's-a spaghetti! Here we go!
- Bart: Uh, Homer, we're still under attack.
- Marge: I guess all that's left to do is pray that God saves us.
- Lisa: That's it, Mom! We have to talk to God!
- Marge: Lisa, what are you doing?! It's not safe out there!
- Lisa: I'm going to use my Buddha Hand Powers to build a tower to heaven out of Springfield buildings, then we can get to the only authority who outranks Matt Groening. God!
- Homer: Lisa, everyone knows God only helps the mighty.
- Lisa: Come on, everyone. I've built a stairway to heaven.
- Skeleton Otto: Awesome! I hope the stores aren't all closed!
- William Shakespeare: Who's there? Stand and unfold yourself!
- Homer: Hey, what's the big idea? Let us through!
- Lisa: Uh, Dad, I think that's Shakespeare, you know, the Bard of Avon!
- Marge: Ooo! I love Avon!
- William Shakespeare: I pray thee cease thy counsel, which falls into mine ears as profitless as water in a sieve.
- Bart: Enough of the John Grisham fancy-talk, mustachio!
- William Shakespeare: Meet Yorick! A fellow of infiniteªDEATH!
- [Homer and Bart fighting Shakespeare]
- Homer: You're an iambic jerk!
- Homer: I'm going to mock you in your lame ass style!
- Homer: I should be fighting Francis Bacon! He's the one who wrote your plays!
- Homer: What else did you write that I can make into an insult?
- Homer: You've got nothing on Tom Clancy!
- Homer: You can write, but you can't fight!
- Homer: Here's Midsummer Night's ass-kicking!
- Homer: Your plays are indulgent and unfunny!
- Homer: Write a sonnet about that!
- Homer: See you in Hell, Shakespeare!
- Homer: Here's a soliloquy: you suck!
- Bart: More like the 'tard of Avon.
- Bart: Even your Cliff's Notes are boring!
- Bart: If not for the vanity of actors, your work would be long forgotten!
- Bart: Write a joke, loser!
- Bart: Only Lisa likes you!
- Bart: Shakespeare in love? Shakespeare in pain!
- Bart: Nice neck-ruffle, you tool!
- Bart: That which we call a fart by any other name would smell like your butt!
- Bart: I never did any of my homework about you!
- Bart: Hey fat ass, knock him off his cloud.
- [William Shakespeare fighting Bart and Homer]
- William Shakespeare: A plague on both your asses!
- William Shakespeare: My Kingdom for a horse -- did I write that?
- William Shakespeare: I wish I could have written more limericks!
- William Shakespeare: I'm gonna go all Macbeth on your asses!
- William Shakespeare: Why does no one perform "The Winter's Tale?"
- William Shakespeare: I'll tame your shrew!
- William Shakespeare: Get ready to see "Shakespeare in Hate!"
- William Shakespeare: I pity the fool who fights Will Shakespeare!
- William Shakespeare: Alas, Horatio, I kicked your butts!
- William Shakespeare: All the world's a stage -- for me to whup your asses!
- William Shakespeare: What has thou jerks done?
- William Shakespeare: The Bard of Avon hath fallen on his tuchis!
- William Shakespeare: Great Greymalkin that hurt!
- William Shakespeare: That was the unkindest cut of all!
- William Shakespeare: Ow -- I sat on my hemroids!
- William Shakespeare: To be or not to be, that is the -- ow ow ow dead.
- [The Simpsons reacting to heaven]
- Bart: Hey... heaven smells like lotion.
- Bart: Heaven is fancy. Hope I don't have to tip the angels.
- Bart: I feel a little underdressed in shorts.
- Lisa: Heaven is zen -- I love it!
- Lisa: I wonder if I have time for a quick hot rock massage?
- Lisa: I hope the heavenly spa menu is vegan.
- Lisa: Damn you, Alexei Pajitnov!,
- Lisa: Ugh, I can't believe I helped build another Starbucks.
- [The Simpsons reacting to re-used enemies]
- Homer: Oh no, not these jerks again.
- Bart: Aliens in heaven? Maybe this place isn't so lame.
- Bart: Ha, ha! You loggers are de-ad!
- Bart: Sweet -- more dolphins for me to kill.
- Bart: I knew heaven would be filled with jerks, but this is ridiculous.
- Lisa: Aliens? I thought you would have your own heaven!
- Lisa: Loggers! The same loggers that I killed and or got fired!
- Lisa: Oh, kind and noble dolphins, don't make me kick your ass again!
- Lisa: I knew we hadn't seen the last of these guys -- (SHEEPISH) I looked ahead in the manual.
- Marge: Oh, how nice. Everyone we defeated went to heaven!
- [Heavenly Spa Announcements]
- Heavenly Spa: All treatments must be cancelled two hours in advance or your credit card will be charged.
- Heavenly Spa: Don't forget to visit our classic arcade game room.
- Heavenly Spa: God smiles upon those who tip the staff.
- Heavenly Spa: Towel fee, fifteen dollars.
- Heavenly Spa: Sandals must be worn at all times in heavenly showers.
- Heavenly Spa: Movie titles do not appear on the bill.
- Heavenly Spa: God's Choice massage oils available for sale in gift shop.
- Heavenly Spa: Triple-A members get a fifteen percent discount.
- Heavenly Spa: Remember, God loves you. And video games.
- Heavenly Spa: No dolphins allowed in the hot tubs.
- Heavenly Spa: No outside food in heaven.
- Heavenly Spa: The spa is not liable for any injuries suffered on property.
- Heavenly Spa: Aliens must shower before entering pool.
- Heavenly Spa: Warning: Satan sometimes appears in steam room.
- Heavenly Spa: Don't forget -- April is Lobsterfest in the Heavenly Dining Room!
- [The Simpsons meeting Benjamin Franklin]
- Lisa: Wow, Benjamin Franklin! You're my intellectual hero! Please please let us pass so we can talk to God.
- Benjamin Franklin: No way, Lisa. You're a bigger butt-kisser than Thomas Jefferson! Up here, I'm judge, jury and executioner. It's time you all learned that heaven can be a hell of a place!
- [The Simpsons fighting Benjamin Franklin]
- Homer: I've never heard of you!
- Homer: You look like you're on money but I'm nut sure!
- Homer: You're balder than me, Franklin!
- Homer: You smell like French ladies!
- Homer: Big deal, you invented electricity, like any one needs that!
- Bart: This is from Bart Simpson's almanac -- get bent!
- Bart: I can't believe you wanted the national bird to be a turkey!
- Bart: I'll frame your Constitution!
- Bart: Those half-glasses make you look old!
- Lisa: I forgot what I leanred about you in school!
- Lisa: You're one of history's greatest sexists!
- Lisa: You're no Thomas Jefferson!
- Lisa: Those hippie half-glasses are lame!
- Lisa: The turkey as the national bird? That's insane. An entrée can't be a national bird!
- Lisa: You should use electricity for good, not evil!
- Lisa: You may have been wise, but you were also sexist!
- Lisa: Many of your proverbs are obvious!
- Lisa: You were never president! You were never president!
- Lisa: Michael Bolton called, he wanted his haircut back!
- [Benjamin Franklin fighting the Simpsons]
- Benjamin Franklin: Early to bed for you kids!
- Benjamin Franklin: There was never a good war -- except this one!
- Benjamin Franklin: All the world's a stage -- wait, that's Shakespeare. Sorry.
- Benjamin Franklin: Haste makes me wasting you!
- Benjamin Franklin: It's all about the Benjamin Franklins!
- Benjamin Franklin: I'm gonna make you turkeys the national dead birds!
- Benjamin Franklin: Eat kite!
- Benjamin Franklin: Live free and DIE!
- Benjamin Franklin: I'm fat but I'm quick!
- Benjamin Franklin: I wish I was back in Tony Hawk Underground 2!
- Benjamin Franklin: I was ambassador to France! Uwahahahaha!
- Benjamin Franklin: I'm flatter than a $100 bill.
- Benjamin Franklin: Ow -- my giant ass!
- Benjamin Franklin: I sat on my bifocals!
- Benjamin Franklin: Poor Richard's lower back!
- Benjamin Franklin: My GOUT! My GOUT!
- Benjamin Franklin: Early to bed, and early to rise, makes a man healthy and -- ow ow ow dead!
- [The Simpsons meeting God]
- Marge: Oh my. God's not setting a very good example.
- Homer: No wonder you never hear about God having a girlfriend.
- God: (AFRAID) Is someone there?! I don't have any money!
- Lisa: God, it's the Simpsons here. You've been playing with our lives and we'd like you to stop. Our home, family and friends are all suffering.
- Bart: Yeah, God, you used to be cool.
- God: (OFFENDED) Just because I'm a gamer doesn't mean I'm not cool.
- God: Your uneasy looks have brought my disfavor! You buncha jerks!
- [The Simpsons fighting God]
- Homer: Snoopy dances better than you!
- Homer: Ha! You dance as bad as me!
- Homer: Hahaha, I wish the other religions could see how lame you dance!
- Homer: Hey -- creator of all things -- you're weak!
- Homer: You call yourself a gamer?
- Homer: In the beginning... you suck!
- Homer: And what's the deal with platypuses, anyway?
- Homer: Nice robes, hippie!
- Homer: Ha! I can't believe it! God sucks at videogames! Ah-hahahaha!
- Homer: Now you're obsolete! That's a next-generation butt kicking!
- Bart: You can't dance in sandals!
- Bart: You dance like grampa at a wedding!
- Bart: Face it -- you have no moves!
- Bart: I pray to Santa Claus!
- Bart: God, I've never forgiven you for inventing school!
- Bart: I bet you play every game on "easy."
- Bart: Your robes have Cheeto dust on them!
- Bart: I don't worship you -- I worhip Crom! Hail Crom!
- Bart: Milhouse is better at videogames than you!
- Lisa: You got served!
- Lisa: Your dance like my mom!
- Lisa: Billy Mitchell is the God of video games, not you!
- Lisa: You blow more than Dig Dug!
- Lisa: Santa never gave me a pony!
- Lisa: Eww, It smells like Otto's jacket in here.
- Lisa: You were a real jerk in the Old Testament!
- Lisa: You should stick to Infocom games like Zork!
- Lisa: You're omniscient -- I call that cheating!
- Lisa: Those who don't learn from past levels will be forced to repeat them.
- Marge: I honor you, oh lord, but you are not good at videogames.
- Marge: Thou art father of all things, except video game skills.
- Marge: You giveth of life, but sucketh at games.
- Marge: Maybe Jesus could give you some game pointers.
- Marge: Even God magic can't make you good!
- Marge: I prayed for new curtains -- where are they?
- Marge: God is love! And love is bad at video games!
- [God fighting the Simpsons]
- God: Prepare to meet your maker!
- God: I'm gonna make heaven seem like hell!
- God: Immortal combat!
- God: It's not gonna take six days to whomp you!
- God: You ugly, you ugly, yo momma says you ugly!
- God: Here comes the flood -- of pain!
- God: You better pray!
- God: That Lovejoy is a loser -- just like you!
- God: The one true faith... is video games!
- God: God's got game!
- God: Don't hate the maker, hate the game!
- God: God got mad skills!
- God: God is great -- at gaming!
- God: Worship my amazing abilities!
- God: I'm like the Michael Jordan of video games!
- God: If you can't take the heat, stay out of the heavens!
- God: Ssssmokin!
- God: Beard power -- activate!
- God: Me, I'm good!
- God: First original sin -- now this!
- God: Great, way to hurt God's feelings.
- [Ending Cutscene]
- Bart: Alright, loser! You stop the destruction of our town and give us some answers... or these save games go in the drink!
- God: No! My save games! Stop! I'm on the final boss fight in Oblivion. I can't start again from the beginning! OK. I'll do whatever you want.
- Bart: I thought so.
- God: Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!
- Homer: Alright, uhh, God, God, is it? It's time for some answers! Who...are we?
- God: Here's the bad news. You're video game characters. You were designed by computer geeks in cubicles to run around and be controlled by other computer geeks in their bedrooms.
- Bart: We knew that, Birkenstocks.
- Lisa: Yeah -- explain to us the meaning of life!
- God: Okay... those computer geeks who control you, thing is, they're part of a videogame too. You see, "The Planet Earth" is my most immersive, detailed video game yet. And I play it 24-hours a day. It's great -- you can get out of your car, have a family, I even put in a complete and wholly consistent fossil record, for the nerds. So, "The Simpsons Game", your game, is really nothing but a mini game inside my Earth game, if you think about it.
- Lisa: So not only are we not real, we're characters inside a mini-game inside another game? And the people playing us right now are the characters inside the big game that you're playing.
- God: Well... you're not inside just any game. "The Planet Earth" got a score of 96 on Meta-meta-critic.
- Bart: But why did you let me find the instruction book back in Springfield? Doesn't that mess up your whole system?
- God: Oh, totally! That was like a complete accident...
- God: Here I am, rock you like a hurricane...How do you control the camera in this thing? Is it the L and R button or what? Screw this, I'm getting a beer.
- God: (LONG EXPLETIVE BEEP NOISE)
- Bart: The Simpsons Game?
- God: So, yeah. You see? Oops.
- Homer: Oops isn't gonna cut it, Mister glowing-visage-beautiful-beyond-all-description! You gotta make this right!!!
- God: Relax, relax! God! I feel really, really super bad about all of this and I seriously want to finish Oblivion so I can get started on something else. So, what do you want?
- Marge: Put Springfield back the way it was!
- Bart: And let us keep our awesome powers!
- Lisa: Improve the working conditions of all video game characters!
- Homer: Grant me three wishes!
- God: Fine, fine. I'll do all that stuff, even make games less dangerous for the characters. I guess games have been getting too violent.
- Lisa: God there is one thing...Do you ever wonder if you're a character in a video game?
- God: Pshhh. That's, that's just dumb. I mean, stop being dumb.
- Ralph: Whoa.
- Ralph: Daddy, someone's lookin' at me!
