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Difference between revisions of "Better Off Ned/Quotes"

Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
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{{TabQ}}
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{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Screenless|Highway to Well}}
  
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{{qf|[[Bart]]}} Wow, Grampa, your stories are really cool today.
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{{qf|[[Grampa]]}} Yeah, the nursing home finally stopped using me as the placebo and gave me real meds.
 +
----
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{{qf|[[Principal Skinner]]}} Our vocabulary score was also abysmal.
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{{qf|[[Ralph Wiggum]]}} Is that a bad...
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{{qf|Skinner}} It's a bad thing, yes.
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{{qf|Ralph}} Yay!
 +
----
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{{qf|[[Kirk Van Houten]]}} Climb in my ass hatch, son.
 +
----
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{{qf|[[Miss Hoover]]}} You monster. You had me finally believing the school would be destroyed, and you took it away.
 +
----
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{{qf|Skinner}} Son, you forced this man to jump on the grenade seconds before I was going to.
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{{qf|[[Superintendent Chalmers]]}} Well, Simpson, thanks to you, now no one can bring grenades to school.
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----
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{{qf|[[Ned Flanders]]}} I can make that real blood, you little punk.
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{{qf|Bart}} What did you say?
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{{qf|Ned}} What I meant to say was, oodily-doodily, we'll change that atti-toodily.
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----
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{{qf|[[Dr. Hibbert]]}} Mm. Remarkable. I thought the only way to turn Bart into a little angel was a downed power line at a water park.
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----
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{{qf|Homer}} You shouldn't be out here alone.
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{{qf|[[Nelson Muntz]]}} Oh, nobody cares. My dad left. My mom's a drunk. My house is a trailer, and all the wheels are flat. My last solid food was an ice cube. My TV is a milk crate with a squirrel in it.
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{{qf|Homer}} ''[thinking]'' This kid is such a wreck, even I could help him. Which I could use to get back at Bart.
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{{qf|Nelson}} I get my hair cut by hiding in the bushes when the gardener comes by.
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{{qf|Homer}} ''[thinking]'' Am I gonna do it? Is it wrong to take advantage of one child's feelings to make another child feel bad? Nobody has the answer to that.
 +
----
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{{qf|[[Todd Flanders]]}} I can't believe we're gonna be in the pride parade.
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{{qf|Ned}} Christian pride. Finally, Christians can openly show our faith.
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{{qf|[[Rod]] and Todd}} We're sure! We're pure! Get used to it!
 +
----
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{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Here's $40. That's a lot of money to me. But I want you to get some therapy about what you're doing.
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{{qf|[[Moe Szyslak]]}} 40 bucks' worth of therapy coming up.
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{{qf|Lisa}} From a licensed therapist.
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{{qf|Homer}} Moe has a liquor license.
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{{qf|Moe}} Yeah, let's not discuss that too much.
 +
----
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{{qf|[[Gil Gunderson]]}} Doc, I see it all so clearly now. I'm afraid of success because my father never had time for me. Which means...
 +
{{qf|[[Therapist]]}} Time's up.
 +
{{qf|Gil}} But two more minutes...
 +
{{qf|Therapist}} It's not a breakthrough.
 +
{{qf|Gil}} Ah, now I feel worse than when I came in.
 +
{{qf|Therapist}} See you next month.
 +
 +
{{Season 31|Q}}

Latest revision as of 10:48, August 26, 2020


Season 31 Episode Quotes
677 "Screenless"
678
"Better Off Ned"
"Highway to Well" 679


Bart: Wow, Grampa, your stories are really cool today.
Grampa: Yeah, the nursing home finally stopped using me as the placebo and gave me real meds.

Principal Skinner: Our vocabulary score was also abysmal.
Ralph Wiggum: Is that a bad...
Skinner: It's a bad thing, yes.
Ralph: Yay!

Kirk Van Houten: Climb in my ass hatch, son.

Miss Hoover: You monster. You had me finally believing the school would be destroyed, and you took it away.

Skinner: Son, you forced this man to jump on the grenade seconds before I was going to.
Superintendent Chalmers: Well, Simpson, thanks to you, now no one can bring grenades to school.

Ned Flanders: I can make that real blood, you little punk.
Bart: What did you say?
Ned: What I meant to say was, oodily-doodily, we'll change that atti-toodily.

Dr. Hibbert: Mm. Remarkable. I thought the only way to turn Bart into a little angel was a downed power line at a water park.

Homer: You shouldn't be out here alone.
Nelson Muntz: Oh, nobody cares. My dad left. My mom's a drunk. My house is a trailer, and all the wheels are flat. My last solid food was an ice cube. My TV is a milk crate with a squirrel in it.
Homer: [thinking] This kid is such a wreck, even I could help him. Which I could use to get back at Bart.
Nelson: I get my hair cut by hiding in the bushes when the gardener comes by.
Homer: [thinking] Am I gonna do it? Is it wrong to take advantage of one child's feelings to make another child feel bad? Nobody has the answer to that.

Todd Flanders: I can't believe we're gonna be in the pride parade.
Ned: Christian pride. Finally, Christians can openly show our faith.
Rod and Todd: We're sure! We're pure! Get used to it!

Lisa: Here's $40. That's a lot of money to me. But I want you to get some therapy about what you're doing.
Moe Szyslak: 40 bucks' worth of therapy coming up.
Lisa: From a licensed therapist.
Homer: Moe has a liquor license.
Moe: Yeah, let's not discuss that too much.

Gil Gunderson: Doc, I see it all so clearly now. I'm afraid of success because my father never had time for me. Which means...
Therapist: Time's up.
Gil: But two more minutes...
Therapist: It's not a breakthrough.
Gil: Ah, now I feel worse than when I came in.
Therapist: See you next month.
Season 31 Quotes
The Winter of Our Monetized Content Go Big or Go Homer The Fat Blue Line Treehouse of Horror XXX Gorillas on the Mast Marge the Lumberjill Livin La Pura Vida Thanksgiving of Horror Todd, Todd, Why Hast Thou Forsaken Me? Bobby, It's Cold Outside Hail to the Teeth The Miseducation of Lisa Simpson Frinkcoin Bart the Bad Guy Screenless Better Off Ned Highway to Well The Incredible Lightness of Being a Baby Warrin' Priests: Part One Warrin' Priests: Part Two The Hateful Eight-Year-Olds The Way of the Dog