Livin La Pura Vida/Quotes
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< Livin La Pura Vida
Revision as of 07:14, August 17, 2020 by Solar Dragon (talk | contribs) (Created page with "{{TabQ|nogags}} {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Marge the Lumberjill|Thanksgiving of Horror}} {{qf|Marge}} We'll stay in a luxury villa right on the beach... {{qf|Homer}} Whoo-h...")
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- Marge: We'll stay in a luxury villa right on the beach...
- Homer: Whoo-hoo!
- Marge: ..near Pristine rain forests, home to five percent of the species on Earth...
- Lisa: Biodiversity!
- Marge: ..in a land where it's normal for kids to carry machetes.
- Bart: Legalize it!
- Marge: [to Maggie] And you can chew on the guidebook.
- Marge: I know it's expensive, but we spend our whole lives worrying about money.
- Homer: That's because we don't have that much. We have a mortgage, a reverse mortgage. I think the house is owned by the car.
- Marge: Patty's new relationship really has to work out, because the dating apps won't take her anymore.
- Marge: What's "Pura vida"?
- Kirk Van Houten: Uh, it means "pure life." Kind of a state of mind down here. Very chill. Like what you think of as chill but, like, a million times chiller.
- Homer: You also follow the pro cornhole tour?
- Evelyn: Sure do. I used to play on my daddy's farm. We'd toss bags all day, even when it was hotter than a two-dollar pistol.
- [Homer imagines himself juggling a hot $2 pistol]
- Homer: That is hot. Do you always speak in such colorful Southern-isms?
- Evelyn: Haha. Does a mama possum skip church on Sundays?
- Homer: Hmm. I bet she does. [laughs]
- Homer: Oh. Hey, guys. We met these awesome monkeys on the beach, and we said they could crash here in exchange for them being hilarious.
- Homer: Honey, relax. The waterfall picture's going to be fine.
- Marge: Fine? If this photo is just "fine", we're getting a divorce.
- Bart: [to Lisa] Why are you freaking out? Shouldn't you be in the jungle kissing a boa constrictor or something?
- Lisa: This trip is so expensive, and Mom and Dad don't care, so I'm practicing sleeping in a car for when we lose the house and have to sleep in our car!
- Kirk: I can drink from the stream. After all these years, my gut is biomis simpatico with the local bacteria. [drinks from the stream] Ugh! Oh, God, there's something moving inside me! Oh, look out! Oh, look out! Look out, I said look out! Look out! Oh God! No simpatico! No simpatico!
- Kirk: Oh, I'm sorry, Kirk's tum-tum. Daddy drank some ick-ick. Oh, the rumblies are coming. The rumblies are coming! They're here!
- Marge: Patricia Maleficent Bouvier, I've put up with you criticizing my husband for years, and I've had it. Evelyn got Homer drunk. Evelyn ruined my dream photo. She's the bad influence.
- Patty: That's ridiculous.
- Marge: She may be southern, she may be a woman, but you're dating a Homer.
- Patty: Oh, no.
- Bernice Hibbert: I'm stunned.
- Dr. Hibbert: I'm shocked.
- Shauna Chalmers: I'm Shauna.
- Luann Van Houten: I'm just as surprised as any of you.
- Kirk: Oh, what?! Come on! This scam was her idea. And this year she even charged you more so we could pay for our "intimacy coach". I mean, how many things can you do with a feather?
- [Luann slaps Kirk. Everyone else approaches Kirk]
- Kirk: Oh, easy, guys, easy. Everyone try to remain pura vida. Huh?
- Dr. Hibbert: I'm gonna pura vida my foot in your ass if you don't give me back my money.
- Marge: Patty! Come back!
- Patty: I can't! Because I'm on a zipline...
- Marge: Evelyn loves you, and Homer hates you more than anything in the world.
- Patty: Even more than he hates Selma?
- Marge: He feels sorry for Selma, because she has to live with you.