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Lisa the Boy Scout/Quotes

Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki


Season 34 Episode Quotes
730 "One Angry Lisa"
731
"Lisa the Boy Scout"
"The King of Nice" 732


Male Ashley: Attention, corporate overlords, we are Pseudo-nonymous, and we have taken over this broadcast. We are the anarchist collective of nameless hacktivists who published the internal emails of Waffle House and brought Home Depot's "Find a store near you" feature to its knees.
Female Ashley: Now we have hacked into the Disney Corporation's servers and seized hundreds of hours of never-before-aired footage from the television show The Simpsons. Stories so ill-conceived, so idiotic that their exposure would destroy the value of the very I.P. itself.
Male Ashley: Until we are paid a ransom of $20 million in Bitcoin, we will air these show-destroying scenes one after another, starting now.

Carl Carlson: No, no, it can't be true!
Homer: It is true, Carl. There never was a Lenny.
Carl: So Lenny was just a figment of my imagination? I... I made him up?
Moe Szyslak: Yeah, your psyche created "Lenny" to help you deal with a terrible trauma there.
Carl: What trauma?
Homer: Finding out your previous best friend wasn't real. It's kind of a thing with you.

Future Bart: Greetings, lamewads from the past! I have come back in time to reveal the events of the future, so that you can amaze the world with your uncannily accurate predictions!
Homer: Less yelling, more foretelling.

Future Bart: Disney buys Fox.
Homer: And then they both go under?!
Future Bart: No, they're both absorbed by Panda Express. Pretty much everything now is Panda Express.
Bart: That makes sense.
Lisa: I get it.

Reggie: Always with the quitting, this one. I can't do that, Doreen! The police department needs someone inside the school!
Doreen: So why's it got to be you?
Reggie: Look at me, Didi. I'm the only 36-year-old who can pass for ten!

Male Ashley: They still haven't paid the ransom. Did they not see the nonsense we just released? How is Martin Prince an adult cop?
Female Ashley: Well, maybe I overestimated how much Disney cares about Lenny.

Female Ashley: Wait! Why did the voice-changing app switch off?
Male Ashley: Bollocks. I didn't upgrade to the premium edition, and the free trial period ran out, I'm afraid. I am so daft.

Professor Frink: Uh, yes. The day is Sol, uh, 150. I am stranded on Mars. I suspect my fellow astronauts left me behind on purpose, as from the bathroom I did hear the giggling and the shushing and the "Blast off quick before he's done tinkling." I have a mere three days of air and water remaining. There is no hope. Unless I glayvenate the hydrogen, flavenize the oxygen, and, yes, yes, poopulate the soil!

Homer: Hello. This is Homer Simpson. From the bottom of my heart, I apologize to the great, great, great people of Finland for what I said. I have done many, many, many, many, many episodes, and in one of those... just one... I mixed you up with Norway. And I have so, so, so, so, so much love and respect for... I think "Finns" is what you're called. And if I ever... I mean ever... Ever, ever, ever thought that an innocent slip of the tongue is something that an entire nation could get worked up about, I would've kept my mouth shut. And the scary, scary, scary, oh-so-scary lawyers of the giant, giant... I mean giant... So, so giant, scary corporation I work for would not have had to draft this statement. God bless you and all the peoples of South America, for you are a... What? What do you mean I have to record it again? What did I say?

Ned Flanders: That's it. Boys, we're Jewish now.
Rod Flanders: L'chaim!
Todd Flanders: To life!

Dr. Hibbert: With this level of sour cream in your blood, your brain is completely starved of oxygen. Consequently, you're a moron.
Comic Book Guy: A perfect explanation. Succinct and devastating. Infinite stars! Best. Diagnosis. Ev...

Chief Wiggum: I know Eddie is Ralph's father. Look at the hair. Look at the hair!
Sarah Wiggum: No, Clancy, I swear to you it's not true.
Eddie: My son's breath smells like cat food.
Sarah Wiggum: Okay, you got me.

Milhouse Van Houten: I did a DNA test. I'm not your son.
Kirk Van Houten: Luann, how could you?!
Milhouse: I'm not hers either.
Luann Van Houten: We're not your parents? Oh, thank God!
Kirk: All right.

Groundskeeper Willie: Rake-y, I'm not your real father. And I'm not Scottish, I'm Welsh! Oh, don't turn your back on me.

Marge: Oh, Homie. You're awake.
Homer: What happened?
Lisa: You've been in a coma ever since you tried to jump Springfield Gorge.
Homer: How long?
Lisa: Two days ago.
Homer: Two days? But... I had so many adventures. More than 700.
Marge: Those were all coma dreams. None of them ever happened.
Homer: [sobs] The "B" stories, too? I never had a pet lobster? I never went to space? What about the Halloweens?!

Female Ashley: Take one more step and I'll blow this I.P. to Magic Kingdom come.
FBI Agent: Go ahead. You've already released all the Simpsons files. No one cared. The only people still watching that show are football fans who passed out with the TV on.
Female Ashley: I am not talking about The Simpsons. We've hacked into all of Disney. That means Star Wars, Marvel, Pixar. We've even got... Nat Geo.
FBI Agent: You monsters.

Homer: While you were gone, your mom and I almost got divorced over something insignificant.
Marge: Luckily, your dad apologized.
Homer: Yup, I got it down at this point. It's all about the eye contact.
Marge: He knows what works.
Season 34 Quotes
Habeas Tortoise One Angry Lisa Lisa the Boy Scout The King of Nice Not It Treehouse of Horror XXXIII From Beer to Paternity Step Brother from the Same Planet When Nelson Met Lisa Game Done Changed Top Goon My Life as a Vlog The Many Saints of Springfield Carl Carlson Rides Again Bartless Hostile Kirk Place Pin Gal Fan-ily Feud Write Off This Episode The Very Hungry Caterpillars Clown V. Board of Education Homer's Adventures Through the Windshield Glass