Fan-ily Feud/Quotes
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- Bart: Upper deck. We're so far away. I wanted to see teeth fly.
- Homer: Relax, nobody comes to Isotopes games. We'll move into the empty seats behind home plate. You'll be so close to the carnage, you'll have flashbacks for the rest of your life.
- Kent Brockman: Sir, how long have you been a proud member of the Murmur Nation?
- Homer: Since never. Ashlee Starling is a whiny pop singer for whiny girls that love to whine. Right, boy?
- Bart: I disagree. Ashlee Starling's well-crafted songs speak to the inner lives of teens and tweens alike.
- Homer: But you said...
- Bart: I've never met this man. If I knew him, I would teach him to love Ashlee by sharing that one song about how you're beautiful no matter what your face looks like.
- Carl Carlson: [whispering] You have become the target of a highly organized, newly-hormonal fan army. Because of you, I have to wear this T-shirt. [shouting] In case anyone's wondering, I don't agree with Homer.
- Lenny Leonard: Whew. You don't know these fan armies. They're all ruthless psychos. Except for the BTS ARMY, who are just and pure of heart.
- Homer: Once again, Marge is out living it up at the grocery store.
- Homer: Just as I thought, Ashlee what's-her-face.
- Echo: I'm not Ashlee.
- Homer: Aah! What's your face?
- Mackenzie: Your dad has made an alliance with the Echo fan army. Maybe we should leave him alone.
- Lisa: No. We can't back down. Ashlee isn't just a singer we like. She's the photo in our locker. She's our one and only Google Alert. She's the tattoo I've been designing for when I turn 18. We aren't just fans of Ashlee, we are Ashlee!
- Murmur Nation: We are Ashlee!
- Kent Brockman: You heard it here first. Ashlee Starling is great, but not as great as BTS or their fans, who are sane and perfect.
- Lisa: Mackenzie said you weren't excited enough to meet her dog.
- Bart: But-but who names their dog Greg? That's a man name.
- Homer: Lisa, sweetie, delight us with one of your little stories about how the planet is choking on plastic.
- Bart: Don't "sweetie" her. She's the one behind those Murmur Nation attacks on you.
- Homer: Lisa. Wh... But you're the one kid I had on purpose.
- Lisa: Well, Bart was part of it, too, and he doesn't even like Ashlee. He did it just for the fun of torturing you.
- Homer: You? The person I would most suspect? I never could have seen it coming.
- Homer: This has been quite the morning. But I'm most disappointed in you, Maggie.
- Maggie: Mm? Eh?
- Homer: Evil triumphs when good babies do nothing.
- Lisa: Dad's never stayed mad this long.
- Bart: Maybe we should run the can opener. He always comes when he hears that.
- Marge: I tried that already. Tomorrow, we'll start calling theme park jails.
- Lisa: I'm sorry I betrayed you.
- Bart: We're all sorry Lisa betrayed you.
- Lisa: It's crazy that I believed in someone so much that I got swallowed up in groupthink.
- Marge: I know. So scary. Oh, my God, we're late for church!