Sorry Not Sorry/Quotes
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- Homer: Aw, sweetie, are you still mad about that big dumb jerk at school?
- Lisa: She's my teacher. And her name is Miss Hoover.
- Homer: Marge, no one dreams of waking up to the sounds of frying melon.
- Bart: Yeah, Marge.
- Homer: See? Your fruit breakfast has turned him into a first name user.
- Homer: They say the best days of a gravy boat owner's life are the day you get it and the day you get rid of it.
- Lisa: Is Miss Hoover out sick?
- Miss Hoover: No, I'm in sick. I sprained a disc in my back. It feels like I'm passing a kidney stone while giving birth.
- Ralph Wiggum: I say "excuse me" when I give burps.
- Miss Hoover: Not the same, Ralph.
- Miss Hoover: That's enough. Ralph, you're up.
- Ralph: My hero is my thumb. It has its own room in my mittens. Thank you.
- Lisa: A B-minus? No, no. This can't be right. This can't be right. The same grade as Ralph?! Sorry, Ralph, no offense.
- Ralph: There's "a fence" around my bed so I don't steal things from Daddy's squad car again. [pulls out a police radio]
- Lou: [over the radio] Chief, did you tell Snake he could have jail outside today? 'Cause that's what he's saying.
- Chief Wiggum: [over the radio] Leave me alone.
- Lisa: I come here every day eager to learn and you just put me down and complain about your job. In the end, what are you? You're just somebody who works off a formula that leaves no room for passion, individual effort, or the process of learning itself.
- Miss Hoover: Mm.
- Lisa: In other words, you're an uninspiring hack!
- Miss Hoover: Apologize immediately.
- Lisa: No. I told the truth.
- Miss Hoover: The truth has no place in this classroom. Lisa, go to detention.
- Bart: Leave her alone, you jackals. This is the largest stink bomb they make. So powerful it could only be developed by a scientist without a nose.
- Kearney Zzyzwicz: How did he know it worked?
- Bart: He smelled it... with his ears.
- Miss Hoover: Okay, Lisa, your future is in my hands.
- Lisa: I'm-I'm... not sorry! I'm just glad I won't have you next year as a teacher.
- Miss Hoover: I might just move to third grade to torment you.
- Lisa: That would be a real hack move.
- Lisa: Miss Hoover takes the bus. I didn't know that.
- Shauna Chalmers: Actually, she takes two buses. Then she walks half a mile down a train track, swings across a drainage ditch and rides a piece of cardboard down a hill to help her back.
- Lisa: Oh, that's terrible.
- Shauna: I guess. You learn a lot of sad things when you sell weed to teachers.
- Barney Gumble: Excuse me, are you Jennifer Aniston?
- Lisa: No.
- Barney: That's exactly what Jennifer Aniston would say.
- Moe Szyslak: If you have a disagreement with another driver, you simply say, "I'm sorry. Please go ahead." Then you follow 'em home and you pee in their gas tank. You pee in there!
- Raphael: All right, how about school supplies? I got a Scottish guy who sells 'em to me every week.
- Lisa: Hi, Willie.
- Groundskeeper Willie: Uh, uh, yo no hablo English. Ach, the English. How I hate those wankers.
- Bart: I'm soggy.
- Homer: Listen, boy. I'm on to you. I know you're saying "soggy," not "sorry." Mm.
- Bart: You're right, you're right. I completely apolo-cheese.
- Homer: What?
- Bart: I beg your par-ton.
- Homer: Come again?
- Bart: Guilty as Marged.
- Homer: I'll accept that.
