Treehouse of Horror XXXI/Quotes
Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
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"Treehouse of Horror XXXI"
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- Chief Wiggum: Now, listen up, we've got an election to run, under the strict supervision of heavily-medicated octogenarians.
- Old Jewish man: I'm gonna need to see three forms of ID. Twelve if you're a Democrat.
- Bart: Oh, thanks, Mom. "Just keep away from scrotum." Uh, Grampa, where's your scrotum?
- Grampa: Mm, I think it's in my other pants.
- Krusty Doll: His accessories will go to his widow.
- [a symbol-banging monkey bangs their symbols together]
- Krusty Doll: His widow was a monkey? Eh, love is love.
- Ben Mankiewicz: We now return to The Swellest Slum, the musical romp starring Debbie Reynolds as Rosie, the Puerto Rican seamstress.
- Jane Russell: Don't tell me we have to walk through all the booze bags in the Irish district.
- Ben Mankiewicz: And we won't be showing that movie anymore. Coming up next on TCM, nothing.
- Bart: Look, guys, I would have never treated you bad if I'd known you had feelings.
- Milhouse Van Houten: You treat me bad and you know I have feelings.
- Bart: You're in on this, too?
- Milhouse: They've got Puppy Goo-Goo!
- Puppy Goo-Goo: They don't "have me." I ran away, loser.
- Dr. Hibbert: Well, it's pretty straightforward. Bart's bones are Tinkertoys, he has a Build-A-Bear heart, and his brain is Pop Rocks and Silly Putty. [chuckles]
- Bart: I'm Bart Simpson. I love my mother and father.
- Marge: Oh! We've lost him. [cries]
- Hansel: Aren't you supposed to be fattening us up?
- Mr. Burns: I like my children stringy and tough.
- Homer: Listen, machine, there's no evidence that you contain any candy or take any money. But desperate times call for something something.
- Homer: Who the heck are you?
- Homer Barbera: I'm Homer Barbera, a-smarter than the average Homer.
- Noir Homer: This case is gonna be like Homer's skull: hard to crack and not much inside.
- Ned Flanders: Happy Halloween-o, neighborino.
- Noir Homer: Eat lead, Ned.
- Ned: I forgive you!
- Lisa: Dad, by Harlan Ellison's law of circular storytelling, all of you Homers have to get back to the nuclear plant and recreate the energy burst that brought you here.
- Homer: Or what?
- Lisa: You're gonna die! Again and again and again and again.
- Homer: That doesn't sound so bad.
- Lisa: And again.
- Homer: [screams]
- Sherri: Nice party, Lisa. Didn't realize the theme was being a loser.
- Lisa: My party is not full of losers.
- Ralph Wiggum: I can burp magic.
- Comic Book Guy: Yes, you've come to the right place. The temporal loop is simultaneously the most ambitious and laziest of the science fiction tropes. Now, let me look at my black mirror. That's not a reference. It's just, uh... It's filthy.
- Comic Book Guy: Temporal loops are broken by being nice in Groundhog Day, saving the whales in Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, saying "Orange you glad I didn't say 'banana'?" in the knock-knock joke. And in the case of the movie Edge of Tomorrow, it was stopped by poor box office. I suspect Tom Cruise fatigue.
- Lisa: Okay. I've got it. My special power is insight, and my insight into you is we need to find your missing father.
- Nelson: Or we could just kill Gil.
