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{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Marge vs. Singles, Seniors, Childless Couples and Teens and Gays|Diatribe of a Mad Housewife}} | {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Marge vs. Singles, Seniors, Childless Couples and Teens and Gays|Diatribe of a Mad Housewife}} | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Bart]]}} Flame decal for the chain guard, Marine Corps tassels... bullet-proof seat... and a rub-on tattoo for that "special someone." | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Milhouse]]}} That's me! ''[applies tattoo then reads it]'' Biker chick? ''[moans]'' | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Homer]]}} A ten-speed bike?! What did your mother say? | |
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} She said yes. | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Marge]]}} ''[from the other room]'' I said no! | |
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} I'm confused! Which is it? | |
| − | + | {{qf|Marge}} It's no! His old bike is fine! | |
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Yeah, the kitchen lady's right -- no new bike while your old one still works. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Hey, boy, what do you say we build a robot? | |
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} Face it, you're not the most mechanical guy in the world. But you're good at other things: like... eating while driving. That's somethin'... and nobody gets madder at the news. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Mom, I'm not sure I'm ready for a new cat. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Marge}} ''[[When Bad Things Happen To Cute Children]]'' says that a new pet will pull you out of your sorrow cycle. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Lisa}} That book doesn't know how I feel. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Marge}} Oh, it's very wise. It's written by [[Unnamed surfing rabbi|a rabbi]] -- who surfs! | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} There's nothing worse than the look on a boy's face when he says "Dad I don't think you can build a fully-functional robot." | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Krusty]] alarm clock}} It's Tuesday the first. If you live in Krusty Brand low income housing, your rent is due. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Marge}} Oh, Lisa. Honey, it's okay. You're a Buddhist, so you know your cats are now reincarnated as a higher form of life. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Like a dog. Or a snowman! | |
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} Ashes to ashes... dust to dust... we've gotta go fight some robots. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Robot Rumble announcer 2]]}} Can robots feel pain? If so, we are horrible, horrible people. | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Robot Rumble announcer 1]]}} He's killing him softly with his saw! | |
| − | + | {{qf|Robot Rumble announcer 2}} Killing him softly? | |
| − | + | {{qf|Robot Rumble announcer 1}} With his saw! | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Doin' it for the boy...doin' it for the boy... pain is love... to bleed is to care... | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Lisa}} Mom, I'm not sure if I'm ready to open my heart again, but this kitten's name is [[Coltrane]]. Maybe it's a sign? | |
| − | + | {{qf|Marge}} Coltrane? Lisa, I'm glad you're ready to love again. But a kitty needs a proper name, like Whiskers. Or Paws Scaggs. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Lisa}} Well, I think it's only fair I get to name him. You got to name me. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Marge}} You should be glad I did. Your father wanted to call you Bartzeena! | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Robot Rumble announcer 1}} Well, if you ever want to see a mailbox shoot a boy, that's about as close as you're gonna get. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Marge}} My job was to keep Lisa's hope alive. But instead, she's really depressed. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} You think you've got problems, look what I just pulled out of my arm! That's what we in the business call "a biggie." | |
| − | + | {{qf|Marge}} Business, what business? | |
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} The business of being a Dad. Can you hand me that magnet? | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Lisa}} I'm keeping you! You're [[Snowball V|Snowball Five]], but to save money on a new dish, we'll just call you [[Snowball II|Snowball Two]] and pretend this whole thing never happened. | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Principal Skinner]]}} That's really a cheat, isn't it? | |
| − | + | {{qf|Lisa}} I guess you're right, Principal Tamzarian. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Skinner}} I'll just be moving along, Lisa. Snowball II. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Bart, I'm sorry -- I could never build a robot this awesome. I'm a fraud. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} So, you fought all those robots? | |
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Affirmative. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} That is so cool | |
:'''Homer:'' You really think so? | :'''Homer:'' You really think so? | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} Yeah! Any Poindexter can throw some nuts and bolts together -- you risked your own life, even though you're the sole provider for a family of five! I am the luckiest kid in the world. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Son, did you ever suspect it was me? | |
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} Well, you did disappear a lot, but I have gone whole summers without seeing you. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} ''[chuckles]'' Yeah, I'm pretty unreliable. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} I like you, son. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} I like you too, Dad. | |
{{Season 15|Q}} | {{Season 15|Q}} | ||
Revision as of 02:01, June 10, 2019
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- Bart: Flame decal for the chain guard, Marine Corps tassels... bullet-proof seat... and a rub-on tattoo for that "special someone."
- Milhouse: That's me! [applies tattoo then reads it] Biker chick? [moans]
- Homer: A ten-speed bike?! What did your mother say?
- Bart: She said yes.
- Marge: [from the other room] I said no!
- Homer: I'm confused! Which is it?
- Marge: It's no! His old bike is fine!
- Homer: Yeah, the kitchen lady's right -- no new bike while your old one still works.
- Homer: Hey, boy, what do you say we build a robot?
- Bart: Face it, you're not the most mechanical guy in the world. But you're good at other things: like... eating while driving. That's somethin'... and nobody gets madder at the news.
- Lisa: Mom, I'm not sure I'm ready for a new cat.
- Marge: When Bad Things Happen To Cute Children says that a new pet will pull you out of your sorrow cycle.
- Lisa: That book doesn't know how I feel.
- Marge: Oh, it's very wise. It's written by a rabbi -- who surfs!
- Homer: There's nothing worse than the look on a boy's face when he says "Dad I don't think you can build a fully-functional robot."
- Krusty alarm clock: It's Tuesday the first. If you live in Krusty Brand low income housing, your rent is due.
- Marge: Oh, Lisa. Honey, it's okay. You're a Buddhist, so you know your cats are now reincarnated as a higher form of life.
- Homer: Like a dog. Or a snowman!
- Bart: Ashes to ashes... dust to dust... we've gotta go fight some robots.
- Robot Rumble announcer 2: Can robots feel pain? If so, we are horrible, horrible people.
- Robot Rumble announcer 1: He's killing him softly with his saw!
- Robot Rumble announcer 2: Killing him softly?
- Robot Rumble announcer 1: With his saw!
- Homer: Doin' it for the boy...doin' it for the boy... pain is love... to bleed is to care...
- Lisa: Mom, I'm not sure if I'm ready to open my heart again, but this kitten's name is Coltrane. Maybe it's a sign?
- Marge: Coltrane? Lisa, I'm glad you're ready to love again. But a kitty needs a proper name, like Whiskers. Or Paws Scaggs.
- Lisa: Well, I think it's only fair I get to name him. You got to name me.
- Marge: You should be glad I did. Your father wanted to call you Bartzeena!
- Robot Rumble announcer 1: Well, if you ever want to see a mailbox shoot a boy, that's about as close as you're gonna get.
- Marge: My job was to keep Lisa's hope alive. But instead, she's really depressed.
- Homer: You think you've got problems, look what I just pulled out of my arm! That's what we in the business call "a biggie."
- Marge: Business, what business?
- Homer: The business of being a Dad. Can you hand me that magnet?
- Lisa: I'm keeping you! You're Snowball Five, but to save money on a new dish, we'll just call you Snowball Two and pretend this whole thing never happened.
- Principal Skinner: That's really a cheat, isn't it?
- Lisa: I guess you're right, Principal Tamzarian.
- Skinner: I'll just be moving along, Lisa. Snowball II.
- Homer: Bart, I'm sorry -- I could never build a robot this awesome. I'm a fraud.
- Bart: So, you fought all those robots?
- Homer: Affirmative.
- Bart: That is so cool
- 'Homer: You really think so?
- Bart: Yeah! Any Poindexter can throw some nuts and bolts together -- you risked your own life, even though you're the sole provider for a family of five! I am the luckiest kid in the world.
- Homer: Son, did you ever suspect it was me?
- Bart: Well, you did disappear a lot, but I have gone whole summers without seeing you.
- Homer: [chuckles] Yeah, I'm pretty unreliable.
- Homer: I like you, son.
- Bart: I like you too, Dad.
