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Difference between revisions of "Revenge Is a Dish Best Served Three Times/Quotes"

Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
< Revenge Is a Dish Best Served Three Times
m (→‎top: replaced: Rich Texan → The Rich Texan (2), the The Rich Texan → The Rich Texan)
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{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|The Wife Aquatic|Little Big Girl}}
 
{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|The Wife Aquatic|Little Big Girl}}
  
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{{qf|[[Homer]]}} ''[Angrily at The Rich Texan.]'' Reeevenge!!!
+
{{qf|[[Marge]]}} Well, let me tell you a story about a time revenge brought only unhappiness and misery. It happened many years ago in [[Paris]]--
 +
{{qf|[[The Rich Texan]]}} [[Texas]]?
 +
{{qf|Marge}} No, [[France]].
 
----
 
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{{qf|[[The Rich Texan]]}} Outta my way, you seatbelt wearing cowards.
+
{{qf|[[Chief Wiggum]]}} You're under arrest for treason!
 +
{{qf|[[Homer]]}} Treason?! But I love France! The way all our words are either a girl or a guy! Oh, that's the best!
 
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{{qf|Homer}} ''[While crawling through a tunnel.]'' I wonder how long this tunnel... isssssssssssss! ''[Falls in water and into a cage that locks up.]'' D'oh.
+
{{qf|Homer}} I don't want the kids to see me this way!
 +
{{qf|Marge}} Don't worry, they're still drunk from school!
 
----
 
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{{qf|[[Marge]]}} Revenge never solves anything!
+
{{qf|[[Judge Snyder]]}} I sentence you to life...
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{{qf|Homer}} ''[Sarcastically]'' Then what's America doing in [[Iraq]]?
+
{{qf|Homer}} You moron! I'm already alive!
 +
{{qf|Judge Snyder}} ...in prison!
 +
{{qf|Homer}} ''[screams]''
 
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{{qf|[[Bart]]}} Ay, Carumba! ''[Outside the story.]'' That's the only line I get in your stupid story?
+
{{qf|Homer}} Are you gonna torture me?
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{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} There's no such thing as small parts, just small actors. ''[Laughs]''
+
{{qf|[[Lenny Leonard]]}} We can't tell you -- not knowing is the worst torture of all.
 +
{{qf|[[Carl Carlson]]}} Well, that and the Rat Helmet.
 +
{{qf|Lenny}} Now get some sleep -- you've got a nine a.m. Rat Helmet.
 +
{{qf|Homer}} Nine a.m.?!
 
----
 
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{{qf|[[Lou]]}} No sign of the Serpent.
+
{{qf|Homer}} But Marge, I did it all for you!
−
{{qf|[[Chief Wiggum]]}} It's always work with you.
+
{{qf|Marge}} For me, huh? What took you so long?
 +
{{qf|Homer}} It takes time to make a revenge machine this awesome! Plus, in the middle, I had to take revenge on some of my contractors.
 
----
 
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{{qf|Bart}} Now we have three ways to talk about revenge, although the first two were sort of the same, and even the third would have worked better as a Halloween Story.
+
{{qf|[[Martin Prince]]}} Good morning, dinguses. What are you doing? Touching each other's butts?
 
----
 
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{{qf|[[Lenny]]}} ''[To Homer.]'' Now get some sleep, you have a 9:00 AM rat helmet.
+
{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Milhouse, thanks to you, the nerds can breathe easy. Except the ones with asthma. Which is all of them. But still, it's great.
−
{{qf|Homer}} 9:00 AM?
 
 
----
 
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{{qf|[[Nelson]]}} ''[To Milhouse.]'' Ha ha, you forgot me because I had the mumps!
+
{{qf|[[Groundskeeper Willie]]}} Why look, it's Milhouse. What's the power glove for -- openin' the cap on your weird-o pills?
 
----
 
----
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{{qf|[[Milhouse]]}} Having a weapon at school has really made things awesome.
+
{{qf|Homer}} Wow. That had what I really like in a story: an ending.
 
----
 
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{{qf|[[Dolph]]}} ''[To Martin.]'' You are so dead that you're alive.
+
{{qf|[[Bart]]}} Dad, wait! You haven't heard my story.
 +
{{qf|Homer}} You? You're too dumb to tell a story.
 
----
 
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{{qf|Judge}} I sentence you to life.
+
{{qf|Bart}} Holy Hannah! I've got more muscles than a New England clambake. Now all I need is a superhero name.
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{{qf|Homer}} You moron, I'm already alive.
+
{{qf|[[Grampa]]}} You can be the Crimson Cockaboy. Hmmm?
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{{qf|Judge}} In prison!
+
{{qf|Bart}} I'll keep thinking.
 
----
 
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{{qf|[[Moe]]}} I hate this Homer jerk with his beautiful wife and loving family, when all I got is this doorway.
+
{{qf|[[Apu Nahasapeemapetilon]]}} Thank you, masked vigilante. Your over-zealous homicide has saved me eighty cents. Now if you're not going to buy anything, please move along.
 
----
 
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{{qf|[[Snake]]}} Hand over your wallet.
+
{{qf|[[Serpent]]}} I'll be snaking those jewels and venom gonna go! Sorry I didn't asp your permission. Hope that's cobra-cetic.
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{{qf|Homer}} You don't frighten me! ''[Snake shoots Homer.]'' Or my wife! ''[Snake shoots Marge.]'' Or my...
 
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{{qf|Marge}} Shut up!
 
 
----
 
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{{qf|Bart}} ''[Crashes through the window.]'' Party's over, Serpent.
+
{{qf|[[Bartman]]}} Party's over, Serpent!
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{{qf|Chief Wiggum}} No kidding, you're standing in the dip
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{{qf|Chief Wiggum}} No kidding, 'cause you're standing in the dip.
 
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{{qf|Homer}} ''[After Lisa's story.]'' Wow! That had what I really like in a story: an ending!
+
{{qf|The Rich Texan}} Look at all them stars. How many do you think there are?
 +
{{qf|Homer}} Two.
 +
{{qf|The Rich Texan}} What the?! Two?! You think there are two?! Well, I never, how could--
  
 
{{Season 18|Q}}
 
{{Season 18|Q}}

Revision as of 09:59, February 17, 2024


Season 18 Episode Quotes
← 388 "The Wife Aquatic"
389
"Revenge Is a Dish Best Served Three Times"
"Little Big Girl" 390 →


Marge: Well, let me tell you a story about a time revenge brought only unhappiness and misery. It happened many years ago in Paris--
The Rich Texan: Texas?
Marge: No, France.
Chief Wiggum: You're under arrest for treason!
Homer: Treason?! But I love France! The way all our words are either a girl or a guy! Oh, that's the best!
Homer: I don't want the kids to see me this way!
Marge: Don't worry, they're still drunk from school!
Judge Snyder: I sentence you to life...
Homer: You moron! I'm already alive!
Judge Snyder: ...in prison!
Homer: [screams]
Homer: Are you gonna torture me?
Lenny Leonard: We can't tell you -- not knowing is the worst torture of all.
Carl Carlson: Well, that and the Rat Helmet.
Lenny: Now get some sleep -- you've got a nine a.m. Rat Helmet.
Homer: Nine a.m.?!
Homer: But Marge, I did it all for you!
Marge: For me, huh? What took you so long?
Homer: It takes time to make a revenge machine this awesome! Plus, in the middle, I had to take revenge on some of my contractors.
Martin Prince: Good morning, dinguses. What are you doing? Touching each other's butts?
Lisa: Milhouse, thanks to you, the nerds can breathe easy. Except the ones with asthma. Which is all of them. But still, it's great.
Groundskeeper Willie: Why look, it's Milhouse. What's the power glove for -- openin' the cap on your weird-o pills?
Homer: Wow. That had what I really like in a story: an ending.
Bart: Dad, wait! You haven't heard my story.
Homer: You? You're too dumb to tell a story.
Bart: Holy Hannah! I've got more muscles than a New England clambake. Now all I need is a superhero name.
Grampa: You can be the Crimson Cockaboy. Hmmm?
Bart: I'll keep thinking.
Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Thank you, masked vigilante. Your over-zealous homicide has saved me eighty cents. Now if you're not going to buy anything, please move along.
Serpent: I'll be snaking those jewels and venom gonna go! Sorry I didn't asp your permission. Hope that's cobra-cetic.
Bartman: Party's over, Serpent!
Chief Wiggum: No kidding, 'cause you're standing in the dip.
The Rich Texan: Look at all them stars. How many do you think there are?
Homer: Two.
The Rich Texan: What the?! Two?! You think there are two?! Well, I never, how could--
Season 18 Quotes
The Mook, the Chef, the Wife and Her Homer • Jazzy and the Pussycats • Please Homer, Don't Hammer 'Em • Treehouse of Horror XVII • G.I. (Annoyed Grunt) • Moe'N'a Lisa • Ice Cream of Margie (with the Light Blue Hair) • The Haw-Hawed Couple • Kill Gil, Volumes I & II • The Wife Aquatic • Revenge Is a Dish Best Served Three Times • Little Big Girl • Springfield Up • Yokel Chords • Rome-Old and Juli-Eh • Homerazzi • Marge Gamer • The Boys of Bummer • Crook and Ladder • Stop, or My Dog Will Shoot! • 24 Minutes • You Kent Always Say What You Want
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