The Wife Aquatic/Quotes
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- Ned Flanders: Tonight's G-rated gem is a silent film from my favorite year—yester! And while you enjoy this quiet riot, I'll be slipping these religious pamphlets on your windshields.
- Kearney Zzyzwicz: This movie isn't silent—I can hear it sucking.
- Patty Bouvier: Calm down, everybody—here's a movie of us!
- Moe Szyslak: Wow, even I ain't hopin' for porn.
- Lisa: Ugh. This is the most disgusting place we've ever gone.
- Bart: What about Brazil?
- Lisa: After Brazil.
- Marge: Excuse me, skipper—this island used to be a paradise. What happened?
- Homer: I bet it was Bill Clinton's fault.
- Jack: No, no, it was long before him.
- Homer: [shakes head] Slick Willie wiggles out of another one.
- Jack: We brought them in by the boatload, day and night. And then one day they... well, they were gone.
- Lisa: Maybe you just overfished them.
- Jack: Maybe they under-spawned.
- Lisa: Maybe you killed them all.
- Jack: Maybe the fish killed themselves.
- Lisa: Maybe you should be ashamed of yourself!
- Jack: Well maybe you should marry Milhouse! [Lisa gasps] Yeah, that's right, I know about Milhouse.
- Homer: How many Yum-Yum Fish did we get?
- Jack: [sighs] None. Just a few Slarg Fish.
- Homer: Ew, it tastes terrible!
- Jack: No, you don't eat it. Its oil is used to polish stripper poles.
- Homer: Finally. Something even I wouldn't eat.
- Homer: Here you go—beer-battered shrimp.
- Jack: Wait, this is bait! Homer, I told you to beer batter the shrimp and bait the hooks. Did you do the opposite?
- Homer: Uh... I thought today was Opposite Day. By the way, you're very ugly. It's Opposite Day.
- Fausto: Hey captain, we should not go out and check the hooks.
- Jack: It's not Opposite Day!
- Homer: So that means... it is Opposite Day.
- Marge: Oh Homie, I'm so worried. But if I concentrate, our love is so strong, I know I can hear your thoughts.
- Homer: [thinking] Dear Marge, how are you? I am fine. The waves here are way bigger than the ones at home. And the salt water is rising. What's next? Pepper water? Ha ha. Love ya, Homer Simpson.
- Moe Szyslak: I just had this awful feeling that uh, Homer's in terrible trouble.
- Lenny Leonard: Oh, that's funny. I just had a feeling that some guy I don't know named Fausto is in trouble.
- Moe: Come on, we've gotta go help Homer!
- Lenny: And Fausto!