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Kill Gil, Volumes I & II/Quotes

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Season 18 Episode Quotes
386 "The Haw-Hawed Couple"
387
"Kill Gil, Volumes I & II"
"The Wife Aquatic" 388


Patty Bouvier: Elvis Stojko is so handsome!
Selma Bouvier: He can lace up my skates any time.
Moe Szyslak: Don't you hags know that all male figure skaters are "twinkly in the lutz"?
Elvis Stojko: That's a common misconception! I have a girlfriend in Vancouver!
Moe: Made-up girlfriend, made-up city!

The Grumple: Grumply, grumply groo, I'll throw my net over you!

Marge: Come on, Homer, let's get the kids out of here. Homer?
Homer: [fighting The Grumple] Give back that Holiday Cheer, you bastard!
The Grumple: Never!

Gil Gunderson: Well, what can Ol' Santa bring you for Christmas, son?
Kearney Zzyzwicz: I want a dirt bike, one of those video game chairs that vibrate...
Kearney Zzyzwicz, Jr.: Dad, he's not the real Santa. We can't afford that stuff.
Kearney: Shut up, shut up, shut up!

Gil: Sir, I'm glad I have this chance to talk to you. I've been on the payroll here since May, and I'd really like to start working in Ladies Shoes -- not literally of course, I couldn't walk very fast, though I'd learn if that's what it takes...

Marge: You can't go home tonight! It's cold, it's late...
Grampa: Yeah! Maybe I should spend the night here, too.
Homer: You're getting a cab, old man. In fact, I believe I see it now.
Grampa: But I haven't given you a present.
Homer: Your present is leaving.

The Grumple: Grumply, grumply groo, your blood will make my stew!

Homer: Why did you let that loser into our home?
Marge: I'll tell you why: Christian charity.
Homer: Christian Charity? What does a porn star have to do with this?

Marge: And that's why I have trouble saying "no" to people -- even Gil!
Homer: Marge, I have no idea what you were just thinking about. Why would you think I did?

Bart: Gil's gone.
Lisa: Back to Scottsdale.
Bart: Problem solved.
Lisa: End of story.
Bart: Can we have pancakes for dinner?

Assistant: Here's a box for your stuff.
Gil: I can't live in this!
Season 18 Quotes
The Mook, the Chef, the Wife and Her Homer Jazzy and the Pussycats Please Homer, Don't Hammer 'Em Treehouse of Horror XVII G.I. (Annoyed Grunt) Moe'N'a Lisa Ice Cream of Margie (with the Light Blue Hair) The Haw-Hawed Couple Kill Gil, Volumes I & II The Wife Aquatic Revenge Is a Dish Best Served Three Times Little Big Girl Springfield Up Yokel Chords Rome-Old and Juli-Eh Homerazzi Marge Gamer The Boys of Bummer Crook and Ladder Stop, or My Dog Will Shoot! 24 Minutes You Kent Always Say What You Want