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Difference between revisions of "Homerland/Quotes"

Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
< Homerland
(Created page with ":''Marge'': Dear Christian god... :''Lisa'': Hey! :''Marge'': Sorry, dear god... You know which one I mean.")
 
m (→‎top: replaced: :'''[[ → {{qf| (8), ]]:''' → }} (8), :''' → {{qf| (74), {{qf| → }} (37), ''( → ''[ (3), )'' → ]'' (3))
 
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:''[[Marge]]'': Dear Christian god...
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{{TabQ}}
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:''[[Lisa]]'': Hey!
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{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Dangers on a Train|Treehouse of Horror XXIV}}
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:''Marge'': Sorry, dear god... You know which one I mean.
+
 
 +
{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Ooh, there's new marshmallows in the [[Belfast Charms]]!
 +
{{qf|[[Marge]]}} No! No, that's Bart's cereal. It's the only way I can get him to take his "vitamins."
 +
----
 +
{{qf|[[Bart]]}} The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side.
 +
{{qf|Lisa}} That's not right.
 +
{{qf|Bart}} Yes, it is. They're my lines as the Scarecrow in ''The Wizard of Oz.''
 +
----
 +
{{qf|[[Selma Bouvier]]}} Well, he's not in the [[Boise]] morgue. Maybe he was mistaken for a dead elephant and flown back to [[Kenya]].
 +
{{qf|Marge}} You're talking about my husband.
 +
{{qf|Selma}} To spare your feelings, we'll just call him the Blob.
 +
{{qf|[[Patty Bouvier]]}} Two to one says the Blob is stuck in the water-intake pipe at the reservoir.
 +
----
 +
{{qf|[[Chief Wiggum]]}} Sorry I'm late, everyone. I had some trouble getting the voice mails off the 9-1-1 line. Why does everyone have to talk so fast and panicky?
 +
{{qf|Man on the phone}} ''[slowly and clearly]'' A man with a gun is in my house.
 +
{{qf|Chief Wiggum}} Gibberish.
 +
----
 +
{{qf|Marge}} Homie, what happened to you?!
 +
{{qf|[[Homer]]}} I overslept, lost my cell phone, missed my flight.
 +
{{qf|Marge}} Why didn't you call us?
 +
{{qf|Homer}} Well, all the pay phone at the [[Springfield International Airport|airport]] were replaced by self-serve yogurt. I ate all the cookie dough toppings a man could want.
 +
{{qf|Bart}} So many cookies will never be born.
 +
----
 +
{{qf|Marge}} Dear Christian god...
 +
{{qf|Lisa}} Hey!
 +
{{qf|Marge}} Sorry, dear god... You know which one I mean.
 +
----
 +
{{qf|Marge}} I been having snuggle dreams.
 +
{{qf|Homer}} Marge, I changed in Boise. I'm not sure a man who eats right and doesn't drink.
 +
----
 +
{{qf|Bart}} I'm Bart Simpson. Who the hell are you?
 +
{{qf|[[Annie Crawford]]}} Agent Crawford, [[FBI]].
 +
{{qf|Bart}} You guys know I don't talk to field agents. Get your boss on the phone.
 +
----
 +
{{qf|Annie}} Don't talk.
 +
{{qf|Homer}} Okay.
 +
{{qf|Annie}} I want you to know I'm the best there is at finding out what you're up to.
 +
{{qf|Homer}} Ooh.
 +
{{qf|Annie}} I can torture you. I can give you incredible sex. Or you can just tell me what I want to know.
 +
{{qf|Homer}} What was the first one again?
 +
{{qf|Annie}} I see. You're stupid.
 +
{{qf|Homer}} Hey. I'm the one in bed with two beautiful women.
 +
{{qf|Annie}} ''[gasps]'' You think I'm beautiful? Oh!
 +
{{qf|Homer}} In a breaking-and-entering kind of way.
 +
{{qf|Annie}} Well, give me something or I'm not leaving.
 +
----
 +
{{qf|[[Apu]]}} Chief Wiggum, how come every time there's a terrorist chatter in this town, you come to me?
 +
{{qf|Chief Wiggum}} Lay off, Apu. When I look at people, I don't see colors. I just see crackpot religions.
 +
----
 +
{{qf|Lisa}} Dad?!
 +
{{qf|Homer}} Huh? How'd you get in here?
 +
{{qf|Lisa}} Girl Scout Cookies get you in anywhere.
 +
----
 +
{{qf|Lisa}} We did it, Dad. We did it.
 +
{{qf|Homer}} We sure did.
 +
{{qf|Lisa}} You weren't shot.
 +
{{qf|Homer}} No, I was just up late watching a movie. Something with William Holden and... ''[snoring]''
 +
 
 +
{{Season 25|Q}}

Latest revision as of 13:16, May 9, 2021


Season 25 Episode Quotes
← 530 "Dangers on a Train"
531
"Homerland"
"Treehouse of Horror XXIV" 532 →


Lisa: Ooh, there's new marshmallows in the Belfast Charms!
Marge: No! No, that's Bart's cereal. It's the only way I can get him to take his "vitamins."
Bart: The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side.
Lisa: That's not right.
Bart: Yes, it is. They're my lines as the Scarecrow in The Wizard of Oz.
Selma Bouvier: Well, he's not in the Boise morgue. Maybe he was mistaken for a dead elephant and flown back to Kenya.
Marge: You're talking about my husband.
Selma: To spare your feelings, we'll just call him the Blob.
Patty Bouvier: Two to one says the Blob is stuck in the water-intake pipe at the reservoir.
Chief Wiggum: Sorry I'm late, everyone. I had some trouble getting the voice mails off the 9-1-1 line. Why does everyone have to talk so fast and panicky?
Man on the phone: [slowly and clearly] A man with a gun is in my house.
Chief Wiggum: Gibberish.
Marge: Homie, what happened to you?!
Homer: I overslept, lost my cell phone, missed my flight.
Marge: Why didn't you call us?
Homer: Well, all the pay phone at the airport were replaced by self-serve yogurt. I ate all the cookie dough toppings a man could want.
Bart: So many cookies will never be born.
Marge: Dear Christian god...
Lisa: Hey!
Marge: Sorry, dear god... You know which one I mean.
Marge: I been having snuggle dreams.
Homer: Marge, I changed in Boise. I'm not sure a man who eats right and doesn't drink.
Bart: I'm Bart Simpson. Who the hell are you?
Annie Crawford: Agent Crawford, FBI.
Bart: You guys know I don't talk to field agents. Get your boss on the phone.
Annie: Don't talk.
Homer: Okay.
Annie: I want you to know I'm the best there is at finding out what you're up to.
Homer: Ooh.
Annie: I can torture you. I can give you incredible sex. Or you can just tell me what I want to know.
Homer: What was the first one again?
Annie: I see. You're stupid.
Homer: Hey. I'm the one in bed with two beautiful women.
Annie: [gasps] You think I'm beautiful? Oh!
Homer: In a breaking-and-entering kind of way.
Annie: Well, give me something or I'm not leaving.
Apu: Chief Wiggum, how come every time there's a terrorist chatter in this town, you come to me?
Chief Wiggum: Lay off, Apu. When I look at people, I don't see colors. I just see crackpot religions.
Lisa: Dad?!
Homer: Huh? How'd you get in here?
Lisa: Girl Scout Cookies get you in anywhere.
Lisa: We did it, Dad. We did it.
Homer: We sure did.
Lisa: You weren't shot.
Homer: No, I was just up late watching a movie. Something with William Holden and... [snoring]
Season 25 Quotes
Homerland • Treehouse of Horror XXIV • Four Regrettings and a Funeral • YOLO • Labor Pains • The Kid Is All Right • Yellow Subterfuge • White Christmas Blues • Steal This Episode • Married to the Blob • Specs and the City • Diggs • The Man Who Grew Too Much • The Winter of His Content • The War of Art • You Don't Have to Live Like a Referee • Luca$ • Days of Future Future • What to Expect When Bart's Expecting • Brick Like Me • Pay Pal • The Yellow Badge of Cowardge
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