Luca$/Quotes

Quotes

Season 25 Episode Quotes

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546

"You Don't Have to Live Like a Referee"

547
"Luca$"

"Days of Future Future"

548

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Homer: But I did learn something from all this: The sprinklers in this park come on at 3:00 a.m.

Lisa: Hi, Dad.

Bart: Homer.

Homer: Hey, guys! Why are you ducked-down like that?

Bart: Don't want to be seen with you when you're hitting bottom.

Lisa: At least we hope it's bottom.

Homer: Don't worry, it's bottom, all right.

Milhouse Van Houten: A fat kid with a dream? I can't compete with that.

Lisa: What does a competitive eater eat?

Lucas Bortner: All the glamour foods: Pizza, boiled eggs, chicken wings and the big enchilada, which is not enchiladas but hot dogs. 69 hot dogs is the current record. As the great Kobayashi says, [He show off his picture of Kobayashi was eating 2 hot dogs in his shirt] "Detekurutoki itaiyo."

Lisa: What does that mean?

Lucas: "That's gonna hurt coming out."

Lisa: Is Kobayashi the number one, um, uh...

Lucas: The correct term is "gurgitator."

Lisa: I won't be using the correct term then.

Lucas: Oh, hi. Is-is Lisa home?

Marge: Yes, she is. And who are you? [Lucas turn behind his sweater as the camera zoom in, "Luca$" was written in his back sweater] Lucas.

Lucas: [face front] It's pronounced "Luca-dollar." That's my competition name. I'm a competitive eater.

Homer: [off-screen] Competitive eater? Did I hear right? I could be a competitive eater?

Marge: No! You didn't hear anything!

Homer: Yes, I did! I heard "competitive eater"!

Marge: It's for people who haven't had heart problems.

Homer: Then that makes me the Jackie Robinson of the sport, and you are the racist Philadelphia manager!

Marge: Quit comparing me to Ben Chapman.

Homer: I will when you open your mind to change!

[Marge groans angrily as Homer walk away from her]

Selma Bouvier: Hmm. Never saw the pork eat the beans before.

Marge: Actually, I'm a little surprised Lisa likes him.

Selma: Really! Justin Blobber over there doesn't remind you of anyone?

Patty Bouvier: Women marry their fathers, Marge. So you just might be meeting your future "ton-in-law."

Homer: I'm sleeping on Flanders' couch tonight. Ours is crap.

← Season 24 Season 25 Quotes Season 26 →
Homerland • Treehouse of Horror XXIV • Four Regrettings and a Funeral • YOLO • Labor Pains • The Kid Is All Right • Yellow Subterfuge • White Christmas Blues • Steal This Episode • Married to the Blob • Specs and the City • Diggs • The Man Who Grew Too Much • The Winter of His Content • The War of Art • You Don't Have to Live Like a Referee • Luca$ • Days of Future Future • What to Expect When Bart's Expecting • Brick Like Me • Pay Pal • The Yellow Badge of Cowardge