Difference between revisions of "Marge Gamer/Quotes"
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{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Homerazzi|The Boys of Bummer}} | {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Homerazzi|The Boys of Bummer}} | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Principal Skinner]]}} I'm afraid that due to funding cuts, we've had to sell the science department skeleton and replace it with this Halloween costume. ''[Willie models the costume]'' | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Superintendent Chalmers]]}} Thank you, Willie. Now, please return it to its plastic snap case. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Skinner}} ''[clears throat]'' Moving on, our class trip to [[Italy]] is now Spaghetti Night at Papa John's, and your $1,500 deposit will not be refunded. | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Homer]]}} Ooh, Papa John's! | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Oh, [[Marge]], you gotta get on the Net. It's got all the best conspiracy theories. Did you know that {{W|Hezbollah}} owns Little Dolly Snack Cakes? This stuff will rock your world. | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Marge]]}} Fine, I'll log onto Wahoo or Yippe or A-OK or Pooka-dooka, or whatever it's called. | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Sideshow Mel]]}} Can we move this meeting along? I pay my taxes, I expect my orange drink. (Sips cup) Ambrosia! | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Lisa]]}} And this website will tell you the weather. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Marge}} ''[reading]'' Sunny? ''[looks out the window]'' I will never have to look out the window again! | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Marge}} And all this time I thought Googling yourself meant the other thing. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Marge}} The Internet has it all. Today, I found out I have the same birthday as [[Randy Quaid]], I MapQuested a great new route to the armory and I got a list of local houses where I'm not letting you kids trick-or-treat anymore! | |
| − | + | {{qf|Lisa}} I'm proud of you, mom. You're like [[Christopher Columbus]]! You discovered something millions of people knew about before you. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Portly wizard]]}} Greetings, cleric! Will you undertake a quest on my behalf? | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Cleric Marge]]}} Maybe I should run this by my husband first. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Portly wizard}} Things are more fun if you answer yes. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Cleric Marge}} Then yes, hither me forth on mine arduous quest! | |
| − | + | {{qf|Portly wizard}} Once again, just yes. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Marge}} What are you kids doing up so late? | |
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} We just got up. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Lisa}} It's 7AM. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Marge}} ''[gasps]'' I was on the computer all night! | |
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} Actually, it's Saturday. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Marge}} ''[gasps]'' I played a day and a night! ''[she runs out]'' | |
| − | + | {{qf|Lisa}} Bart, it's not Saturday. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Bart}} Shh. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Cleric Marge}} How did you get in my game? Are you a virus? | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Vendor Apu]]}} Oh no! I too am online playing! That cobra king over there is actually [[Snake]]. | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Cobra King]]}} The prison guards think I'm getting my online law degree. Ha, ha! | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Enchantress Krabappel]]}} This game is a great way to meet eligible men who can afford a computer- | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Turkey Skinner]]}} Or have access to one at the school library. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Enchantress Krabappel}} It's amazing how you can be a turkey in every reality. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Turkey Skinner}} What's important is we're talking. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Troll Moe]]}} I'm [[Moe]]. I'm playin' this while I'm on the can. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Cleric Marge}} Wow, Moe! You're a troll! | |
| − | + | {{qf|Troll Moe}} What? No, my character's supposed to look like me. Why does everyone keep thinking I'm a troll? | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Lady Milhouse]]}} Brave sir knight? | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Shadow Knight]]}} What is it Lady Milhouse? | |
| − | + | {{qf|Lady Milhouse}} I'm not a lady, it's a spell. A spell you said you'd reverse. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Shadow Knight}} Yeah, yeah, it's on my list. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Cleric Marge}} Why, Milhouse, don't you look pretty? | |
| − | + | {{qf|Lady Milhouse}} It's a spell! And thank you. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Shadow Knight}} Mom, what are you doing in my game? How would you like it if I suddenly started going shopping with you? | |
| − | + | {{qf|Cleric Marge}} I'd like that very much. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Shadow Knight}} Argh! | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Shadow Knight}} You're making me look bad in front of my minions! | |
| − | + | {{qf|Cleric Marge}} If they think less of you because of me, then they're not really your minions. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Shadow Knight}} Ugh. I am going off to explore the Crevices of Lagrimmar. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Cleric Marge}} Great, I'll come with you. Shouldn't you bundle up? Here, let me enchant your pants. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Shadow Knight}} Uuuuhhhh! | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | :'' | + | :''[Homer walks in on Lisa putting on shin guards]'' |
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Hey, Lisa, self-conscious about your shins? In my days, girls worried about their boobs. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Lisa}} Dad, I'm going to play soccer. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Wait, that's soccer? I always called it human foosball. Would you like me to take you to your game? | |
| − | + | {{qf|Lisa}} You already promised you would. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Aw, do I have to? | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Whatsa matter, buddy? The American flag not good enough for ya? | |
| − | :'' | + | :''[he head butts the linesman holding the orange flag]'' |
| − | + | {{qf|Girl}} That was my father! | |
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} I'm your father now! | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Troll Jimbo]]}} It's the Shadow Knight! | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Cycloid Dolph]]}} Run! | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Troll Kearney]]}} I forget how to do that! | |
| − | + | {{qf|Cycloid Dolph}} Ctrl-shift-R. | |
| − | :'' | + | :''[Bart slices off the bullies' heads]'' |
| − | + | {{qf|Cleric Marge}} Thank you, Bart. This frame grab's going on my coffee cup. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Lisa}} Dad, I'm impressed, you've become a much better referee. | |
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Thanks, honey. After what you said to me, I watched hours and hours of soccer. I almost saw a goal! | |
---- | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|[[Helen Lovejoy]]}} You are so blind, even [[Jesus]] couldn't heal you! | ||
| + | {{qf|[[Timothy Lovejoy, Jr.]]}} Helen, please. Don't drop the "J" bomb. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|[[Cletus Spuckler]]}} Sir, I have sired a dum-dum, a mush-head, a whatsit, a dog boy and somethin' with a human face and fish body what we called Kevin. But my young'uns is not dirty players! | ||
| + | {{qf|Homer}} I don't need a soccer lecture from a hillbilly! | ||
| + | {{qf|Cletus}} That's hill-William to you, sir! | ||
| + | {{qf|{{Ch|Ronaldo}}}} What about a lecture from me, Ronaldo? | ||
| + | {{qf|Homer}} Ronaldo?! Winner of two World Cups and three FIFA Player of the Year awards? | ||
| + | {{qf|Ronaldo}} Yes, I am what you said. Now, I travel the world exposing floppers. And your daughter is a flopper. Now, Ronaldo away! | ||
| + | :''[he exits with a bicycle kick]'' | ||
| + | {{qf|[[Brandine Spuckler]]}} You heard Geraldo. What's it gonna be? | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Lisa}} You can't give me a yellow card! You're my father! | ||
| + | {{qf|Homer}} When I put on these shorts, I'm not your father anymore. And judging by how tight they are, I'm never gonna be anyone else's either. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Shadow Knight}} Where's all my stuff? | ||
| + | {{qf|Cleric Marge}} I thought all the swords and severed heads were kind of gory, so I redecorated using the Hello Kitty expansion pack. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Homer}} Lisa, honey, I bought you something. A DVD! | ||
| + | {{qf|Lisa}} Not interested. | ||
| + | {{qf|Homer}} It's a documentary... by the [[BBC]]... in cooperation with Canal+. | ||
| + | {{qf|Lisa}} ''[gasps]'' Gimme, gimme, gimme! | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Shadow Knight}} Mom, I'm gonna give you life the way I imagine you gave life to me; by pressing alt-F5 repeatedly. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Lisa}} You were right to kick me out of that game. Soccer was making me insane, just as it did the continents of Europe and South America. | ||
| + | {{qf|Homer}} Those places are pretty terrible. | ||
| − | {{Season 18 Q}} | + | {{Season 18|Q}} |
Latest revision as of 15:46, March 28, 2022
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- Principal Skinner: I'm afraid that due to funding cuts, we've had to sell the science department skeleton and replace it with this Halloween costume. [Willie models the costume]
- Superintendent Chalmers: Thank you, Willie. Now, please return it to its plastic snap case.
- Skinner: [clears throat] Moving on, our class trip to Italy is now Spaghetti Night at Papa John's, and your $1,500 deposit will not be refunded.
- Homer: Ooh, Papa John's!
- Homer: Oh, Marge, you gotta get on the Net. It's got all the best conspiracy theories. Did you know that Hezbollah owns Little Dolly Snack Cakes? This stuff will rock your world.
- Marge: Fine, I'll log onto Wahoo or Yippe or A-OK or Pooka-dooka, or whatever it's called.
- Sideshow Mel: Can we move this meeting along? I pay my taxes, I expect my orange drink. (Sips cup) Ambrosia!
- Lisa: And this website will tell you the weather.
- Marge: [reading] Sunny? [looks out the window] I will never have to look out the window again!
- Marge: And all this time I thought Googling yourself meant the other thing.
- Marge: The Internet has it all. Today, I found out I have the same birthday as Randy Quaid, I MapQuested a great new route to the armory and I got a list of local houses where I'm not letting you kids trick-or-treat anymore!
- Lisa: I'm proud of you, mom. You're like Christopher Columbus! You discovered something millions of people knew about before you.
- Portly wizard: Greetings, cleric! Will you undertake a quest on my behalf?
- Cleric Marge: Maybe I should run this by my husband first.
- Portly wizard: Things are more fun if you answer yes.
- Cleric Marge: Then yes, hither me forth on mine arduous quest!
- Portly wizard: Once again, just yes.
- Marge: What are you kids doing up so late?
- Bart: We just got up.
- Lisa: It's 7AM.
- Marge: [gasps] I was on the computer all night!
- Bart: Actually, it's Saturday.
- Marge: [gasps] I played a day and a night! [she runs out]
- Lisa: Bart, it's not Saturday.
- Bart: Shh.
- Cleric Marge: How did you get in my game? Are you a virus?
- Vendor Apu: Oh no! I too am online playing! That cobra king over there is actually Snake.
- Cobra King: The prison guards think I'm getting my online law degree. Ha, ha!
- Enchantress Krabappel: This game is a great way to meet eligible men who can afford a computer-
- Turkey Skinner: Or have access to one at the school library.
- Enchantress Krabappel: It's amazing how you can be a turkey in every reality.
- Turkey Skinner: What's important is we're talking.
- Troll Moe: I'm Moe. I'm playin' this while I'm on the can.
- Cleric Marge: Wow, Moe! You're a troll!
- Troll Moe: What? No, my character's supposed to look like me. Why does everyone keep thinking I'm a troll?
- Lady Milhouse: Brave sir knight?
- Shadow Knight: What is it Lady Milhouse?
- Lady Milhouse: I'm not a lady, it's a spell. A spell you said you'd reverse.
- Shadow Knight: Yeah, yeah, it's on my list.
- Cleric Marge: Why, Milhouse, don't you look pretty?
- Lady Milhouse: It's a spell! And thank you.
- Shadow Knight: Mom, what are you doing in my game? How would you like it if I suddenly started going shopping with you?
- Cleric Marge: I'd like that very much.
- Shadow Knight: Argh!
- Shadow Knight: You're making me look bad in front of my minions!
- Cleric Marge: If they think less of you because of me, then they're not really your minions.
- Shadow Knight: Ugh. I am going off to explore the Crevices of Lagrimmar.
- Cleric Marge: Great, I'll come with you. Shouldn't you bundle up? Here, let me enchant your pants.
- Shadow Knight: Uuuuhhhh!
- [Homer walks in on Lisa putting on shin guards]
- Homer: Hey, Lisa, self-conscious about your shins? In my days, girls worried about their boobs.
- Lisa: Dad, I'm going to play soccer.
- Homer: Wait, that's soccer? I always called it human foosball. Would you like me to take you to your game?
- Lisa: You already promised you would.
- Homer: Aw, do I have to?
- Homer: Whatsa matter, buddy? The American flag not good enough for ya?
- [he head butts the linesman holding the orange flag]
- Girl: That was my father!
- Homer: I'm your father now!
- Troll Jimbo: It's the Shadow Knight!
- Cycloid Dolph: Run!
- Troll Kearney: I forget how to do that!
- Cycloid Dolph: Ctrl-shift-R.
- [Bart slices off the bullies' heads]
- Cleric Marge: Thank you, Bart. This frame grab's going on my coffee cup.
- Lisa: Dad, I'm impressed, you've become a much better referee.
- Homer: Thanks, honey. After what you said to me, I watched hours and hours of soccer. I almost saw a goal!
- Helen Lovejoy: You are so blind, even Jesus couldn't heal you!
- Timothy Lovejoy, Jr.: Helen, please. Don't drop the "J" bomb.
- Cletus Spuckler: Sir, I have sired a dum-dum, a mush-head, a whatsit, a dog boy and somethin' with a human face and fish body what we called Kevin. But my young'uns is not dirty players!
- Homer: I don't need a soccer lecture from a hillbilly!
- Cletus: That's hill-William to you, sir!
- Ronaldo: What about a lecture from me, Ronaldo?
- Homer: Ronaldo?! Winner of two World Cups and three FIFA Player of the Year awards?
- Ronaldo: Yes, I am what you said. Now, I travel the world exposing floppers. And your daughter is a flopper. Now, Ronaldo away!
- [he exits with a bicycle kick]
- Brandine Spuckler: You heard Geraldo. What's it gonna be?
- Lisa: You can't give me a yellow card! You're my father!
- Homer: When I put on these shorts, I'm not your father anymore. And judging by how tight they are, I'm never gonna be anyone else's either.
- Shadow Knight: Where's all my stuff?
- Cleric Marge: I thought all the swords and severed heads were kind of gory, so I redecorated using the Hello Kitty expansion pack.
- Homer: Lisa, honey, I bought you something. A DVD!
- Lisa: Not interested.
- Homer: It's a documentary... by the BBC... in cooperation with Canal+.
- Lisa: [gasps] Gimme, gimme, gimme!
- Shadow Knight: Mom, I'm gonna give you life the way I imagine you gave life to me; by pressing alt-F5 repeatedly.
- Lisa: You were right to kick me out of that game. Soccer was making me insane, just as it did the continents of Europe and South America.
- Homer: Those places are pretty terrible.
