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Lost Verizon/Quotes

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Season Episode
421 "Sex, Pies and Idiot Scrapes"

"Lost Verizon/Quotes"
"Double, Double, Boy in Trouble" 423
[Bart prank calls Hawaii]
Hawaiian bartender: Aloha.
Bart: Aloha to you. I'm looking for Maya. Last name Normousbutt.
Hawaiian bartender: Hang on. I'll check. Uh, has anyone seen Maya Normousbutt?
[Bar patrons laugh]

[Bart's found cell phone rings]
Bart: Hello? Bart Simpson.
Denis Leary: This is Denis Leary, you little puke! When I find you, I'm gonna tear your heart out with two fingers! I know how to do it, too. I learned it for my show.
Bart: Which one? The one that got canceled, or the one that's gonna get canceled?

Bart: I'm never gonna have a cell phone.
Lisa: And I'm never gonna go to Machu Picchu. In this family, you get used to disappointment.

Principal Skinner: I can't believe I'm out of gas. I put in one dollar of gas and I've only driven ninety cents.
Agnes Skinner: You had to drive with the windows open, didn't you, Rockefeller?

Bart: Mom, even Milhouse has a cell phone. Your son is lamer than Milhouse! What does that say about you?

[Bart is at Lisa's tea party]
Bart: I don't know why I agreed to this.
Lisa: Because you like the taste of my imaginary tea.
Bart: Oh, you're right.

Lisa: [seeing what her parents are up to] Tracking software? [gasps] You're spying on Bart!
Marge: Honey, keeping track of someone because you love them is not wrong. It shows you care.
Moe Szyslak: [Listening to Marge via his own bugging device in the basement] That's right my beautiful, beautiful Midge. [laughs] Soon, you'll be mine.
FBI Agent #1: [observing Moe via spy camera] Keep talking, creepo.
FBI Agent #2: Every word buys you another year in the slammer.

[Dr. Hibbert gives Bart money after retrieving his golf ball]
Bart: A dollar? What for?
Dr. Hibbert: It's the least I could do. These balls cost five dollars new.
Bart: So I can get a dollar for every ball I find? Then if a cell phone costs $100, how many balls do I need?
Dr. Hibbert: [speaking aside to Dr. Riviera, his caddy] This is why my kids go to private school. [Laughs]

Marge: Bart, how did you get a cell phone?
Bart: The same way you got me. By accident, on a golf course.

Marge: Son, we can't afford to get you a cell phone. As it is, I'm buying frozen peas in installments.

[Bart driving a forklift and Milhouse standing on the lifts]
Milhouse Van Houten: [laughing] Are you sure this is safe?
Bart: [holding the seat belt] Sure I got my seat belt on.
[Marge shows up]
Marge: Bartholomew Jay Simpson! [Bart brakes the forklift, sending Milhouse flies into a wall, knocking him out] What are you doing at this construction site?
Bart: Uh trying to do something constructive. [Marge murmurs disapprovingly] I'll just take Milhouse home. [picks Milhouse up with the forklift and leaves]
Season 20 Quotes
Sex, Pies and Idiot Scrapes Lost Verizon Double, Double, Boy in Trouble Treehouse of Horror XIX Dangerous Curves Homer and Lisa Exchange Cross Words MyPods and Boomsticks The Burns and the Bees Lisa the Drama Queen Take My Life, Please How the Test Was Won No Loan Again, Naturally Gone Maggie Gone In the Name of the Grandfather Wedding for Disaster Eeny Teeny Maya, Moe The Good, the Sad, and the Drugly Father Knows Worst Waverly Hills 9-0-2-1-D'oh Four Great Women and a Manicure Coming to Homerica