Take My Life, Please/Quotes
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"Take My Life, Please"
- Homer: I'm going to find out what Dondelinger did last summer! Twenty-two years ago! In the winter!
- [After the principal switches the ballot boxes so vance would win class president]
- Principal Dondelinger: [to Carl and Lenny] You two, I want you to dispose of this ballot box.
- Lenny Leonard: Only if you do us a favor.
- Dondelinger: What is it?
- Carl Carlson: Our parents want us to go to this place called "college".
- Lenny: Yeah, bail us out and we'll get rid of the box.
- Dondelinger: [sighs] Fine, but if you mess up, it's Ohio College for both of you!
- Carl and Lenny: AARRGHH!
- [After Homer finds out what his life would have been like after seeing the events inside a tub of magic sauce]
- Homer: Why did fate do this to me?
- Chef: Ask the garlic bread.
- Homer: [picks up the bread] Why? Why?
- Chef: Hey, everyone, the stupid fat man's talking to garlic bread! HAHAHA!
- [After Homer leaves the Italian resturant]
- Homer: Looks like I'll never have a life like Vance has.
- Marge: Homer, close your eyes...
- [The family lead Homer to the Springfield Wall of Fame]
- Marge: Now open!
- [Homer opens his eyes and see's a plaque on the wall of fame dedicated to him]
- Homer: Woohoo! Wait... how did I get on the wall of fame?
- Bart: Hey, plaques come and plaques go.
- [The camera pans out to reveal Principal Skinner's plaque in the garbage can]