Difference between revisions of "'Tis the 30th Season/Quotes"

Latest revision as of 07:51, March 5, 2020

Bart: Say, Lis, I couldn't help but notice you're holding a piece of paper.

Lisa: Oh, this piece of paper? Why, it's just my Christmas list, is all.

Bart: What a coincidence. I also have my Christmas list right here in my hand.

Homer: Oh, you selfish little gangsters. There's always another shakedown, isn't there?

Lisa: What do you know, Bart? There's only one present on my list.

Bart: My word, that's reasonable. I, too, only found one present to be list-worthy.

Marge: Oh, give me the lists.

Homer: Our TV may not be smart, but it's street smart.

Marge: Why do we have an antenna on an HDTV?

Homer: I thought it looked cool.

Gil Gunderson: You want a Cup O' Noodles to chase away the chill?

Marge: How sweet.

Gil: It's just water. I can't afford the real thing, but if you stare at the label while you drink it, you'd swear there was real chicken powder in there.

Norwegian Santa: Hoy, hoy, hoy. I ride on a pig Don't forget to leave me porridge!

Marge: Ugh, I've got it set on Norwegian.

Lisa: Can we please get to our room? We just drove 2,000 miles in four hours.

Jeanie: Of course. And thank you for reminding me why I never had kids.

Jeanie: There's no bathtub. Just a combo shower and toilet. We call it a shoilet.

Bart: This is cool. Cartoon characters no one's ever heard of. That's Mulberry Mutt, Tremendous Boar and Thelonious Skunk.

Hug-A-Bull: Does somebody want a hug?

Bart: No.

Hug-A-Bull: Oh, I think you do.

Bart: Really, I don't.

Homer: Hug the bull, boy.

Hug-A-Bull: That's right, kid. Legally, you have to initiate it.

Marge: Oh, boy. You kids are up early.

Lisa: Bart and I are going to engage in perhaps the most popular Florida tradition... complaining to the manager.

Lisa: This place is nothing like it looked on the Internet.

Jeanie: We can't compete with the big boys. Disney's already laying ground for a new Family Guy World.

Marge: Aw. Are you really having a great time? Really? Because I sure as heck am not.

Bart: No, I'm FaceTiming Milhouse 'cause it's more fun.

Milhouse: Whassup?

Bart: Milhouse, give me something. I'm trapped in The Hall of Vice Presidents.

Milhouse: Well, I'm kind of the vice president of us.

Lisa: Oh, my God. Moe serves Christmas dinner to the old and needy.

Moe: Yeah, look, it's the one nice thing I do. Ha. Guess old Moe's got a heart. Also, if I turn the rummy away, they might wind up in church. That could turn their life around. That's bad for business.

Bart: Dear Lord, we didn't get the gift we wanted, a GL50 9K Smart TV. The place we went was a dump. But isn't Christmas really about being with your family and your bartender?

Lisa: We have traveled many miles to learn there's no place like Moe's.

Homer: Amen.