Difference between revisions of "Dude, Where's My Ranch?/Quotes"

Revision as of 08:55, November 27, 2022

Mr. Burns: Exquisite, just exquisite. Makes me wish I hadn't released the hounds.

Waylon Smithers: Should I call them off, sir?

Mr. Burns: No, no. It's their Christmas too.

Carl Carlson: David Byrne?!

Moe Szyslak: Singer, artist, composer, director, Talking Head...

David Byrne: And, I used to wrestle under the name "El Diablo."

Lenny Leonard: I thought that was Philip Glass.

David Byrne: Yeah, he wishes.

Marge: I am so sick of that song!

Homer: Me too -- I've come to hate my own creation. Now I know how God feels.

The Rich Texan: Welcome to the Lazy I Ranch, where we give you a week of rustic ranch living.

Comic Book Guy: Do you have an internet connection?

The Rich Texan: Internet? [laughing] Son, the only internet connection we got is a dedicated DSL port in the business center. Or you can patch in through the smart-fridge in your cabin.

Lisa: [reading] "On this battleground in 1881, fifty-six Indians lost their lives and four brave Americans lost their hats."

Homer: Those poor hats.

Marge: That was a delicious meal, Cookie. What do we do with our garbage?

Cookie: Just leave it for Cleanie.

Cleanie: My preciousss... Gollum....

Marge: Shucks, Lisa. You sure have taken a shine to that cowpoke.

Lisa: Mom, why are you talking like that?

Marge: Don't rightly know. I just soaked up the lingo like a biscuit in a bucket full of gopher gravy. I'll stop now.

Homer: We did it! Finally, man has triumphed over a small, furry animal!

Luke Stetson: Dang it, Clara should be here by now.

Lisa: I'm sure she's just running late. Or, she's not coming because she doesn't understand how special you are.

Luke Stetson: That sure don't sound like my sister.

Lisa: Sister?! You mean she's not your girlfriend?

Luke Stetson: Hell no! They outlawed that in this state two years ago.

Clara Stetson: Hel-lo, handsome!

Bart: What's up, Cootie Breath?

Homer: Look at those stupid city slickers, with their fur coats and pointy hats.

Marge: Homer, those are elk.

Homer: I still hate them. Go back to Pittsburgh!