Difference between revisions of "Treehouse of Horror XIII/Quotes"
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− | {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Poppa's Got a Brand New Badge|How I Spent My Strummer Vacation | + | {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Poppa's Got a Brand New Badge|How I Spent My Strummer Vacation}} |
− | == Opening Sequence == | + | === Opening Sequence === |
− | {{qf|Maude's Ghost}} Are you ready for tales that will shatter your spine and boil your blood?! | + | {{qf|[[Maude Flanders|Maude's Ghost]]}} Are you ready for tales that will shatter your spine and boil your blood?! |
− | {{qf|Lisa}} Well, duh. | + | {{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Well, duh. |
− | == Send in the Clones == | + | === Send in the Clones === |
− | {{qf|Ned}} ''[ | + | {{qf|[[Ned]]}} ''[looking through kitchen window]'' Hey, Homer, I was wondering if I could borrow that chainsaw you, ahh... stole from me? |
− | {{qf|Homer}} Yeah, but you'll have to leave a credit card. | + | {{qf|[[Homer]]}} Yeah, but you'll have to leave a credit card. |
{{qf|Ned}} No problem.''[takes out card]'' Discover okay? | {{qf|Ned}} No problem.''[takes out card]'' Discover okay? | ||
{{qf|Homer}} ''[reproachfully]'' Ned. | {{qf|Homer}} ''[reproachfully]'' Ned. | ||
{{qf|Ned}} Okay, here's my Amex. | {{qf|Ned}} Okay, here's my Amex. | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | {{qf|Moe}} All right, who's paying the tab? | + | {{qf|[[Moe]]}} All right, who's paying the tab? |
− | {{qf|Homer | + | {{qf|[[Homer's clones]]}} LENNY! |
− | {{qf|Lenny}} Anything for Homers. | + | {{qf|[[Lenny]]}} Anything for Homers. |
---- | ---- | ||
− | {{qf|Marge}} No belly button? You're a clone! Then the real Homer-- | + | {{qf|[[Marge]]}} No belly button? You're a clone! Then the real Homer-- |
− | {{qf|Homer | + | {{qf|Homer clone}} First over cliff. |
---- | ---- | ||
− | {{qf|Homer}} ''[ | + | {{qf|Homer}} ''[just created two clones of himself]'' Now there's four of me. I think this might be a magic hammock. |
− | == The Fright to Creep and Scare Harms == | + | === The Fright to Creep and Scare Harms === |
{{qf|Lisa}} I dream of a world without guns. Don't we all, William? | {{qf|Lisa}} I dream of a world without guns. Don't we all, William? | ||
− | {{qf|Bart}} Lisa has a dead boyfriend! | + | {{qf|[[Bart]]}} Lisa has a dead boyfriend! |
{{qf|Lisa}} He's not my dead boyfriend! He's a dead boy that happens to be my friend. | {{qf|Lisa}} He's not my dead boyfriend! He's a dead boy that happens to be my friend. | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | {{qf|Lou}} ''[handing in his gun]'' This always made me feel like a man, you know? Now all I got is my enormous genitals. | + | {{qf|[[Lou]]}} ''[handing in his gun]'' This always made me feel like a man, you know? Now all I got is my enormous genitals. |
---- | ---- | ||
− | {{qf|William "Billy the Kid" Bonney}} ''[introducing his gang]'' The Sundance Kid! | + | {{qf|William "[[Billy the Kid]]" Bonney}} ''[introducing his gang]'' The Sundance Kid! |
− | {{qf|Comic Book Guy}} What happened to Butch Cassidy? | + | {{qf|[[Comic Book Guy]]}} What happened to Butch Cassidy? |
{{qf|Sundance Kid}} "What happened to Butch Cassidy?" We're not joined at the hip, ya know! | {{qf|Sundance Kid}} "What happened to Butch Cassidy?" We're not joined at the hip, ya know! | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | {{qf|Sideshow Mel}} Another tragedy prevented by gun violence! | + | {{qf|[[Sideshow Mel]]}} Another tragedy prevented by gun violence! |
− | == The Island of Dr. Hibbert == | + | === The Island of [[Dr. Hibbert]] === |
{{qf|Marge}} The House of Pain? I guess this is where you pay the bill. ''[laughs]'' Why am I always funny when no one's around? | {{qf|Marge}} The House of Pain? I guess this is where you pay the bill. ''[laughs]'' Why am I always funny when no one's around? | ||
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Revision as of 02:08, May 12, 2019
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Opening Sequence
- Maude's Ghost: Are you ready for tales that will shatter your spine and boil your blood?!
- Lisa: Well, duh.
Send in the Clones
- Ned: [looking through kitchen window] Hey, Homer, I was wondering if I could borrow that chainsaw you, ahh... stole from me?
- Homer: Yeah, but you'll have to leave a credit card.
- Ned: No problem.[takes out card] Discover okay?
- Homer: [reproachfully] Ned.
- Ned: Okay, here's my Amex.
- Moe: All right, who's paying the tab?
- Homer's clones: LENNY!
- Lenny: Anything for Homers.
- Marge: No belly button? You're a clone! Then the real Homer--
- Homer clone: First over cliff.
- Homer: [just created two clones of himself] Now there's four of me. I think this might be a magic hammock.
The Fright to Creep and Scare Harms
- Lisa: I dream of a world without guns. Don't we all, William?
- Bart: Lisa has a dead boyfriend!
- Lisa: He's not my dead boyfriend! He's a dead boy that happens to be my friend.
- Lou: [handing in his gun] This always made me feel like a man, you know? Now all I got is my enormous genitals.
- William "Billy the Kid" Bonney: [introducing his gang] The Sundance Kid!
- Comic Book Guy: What happened to Butch Cassidy?
- Sundance Kid: "What happened to Butch Cassidy?" We're not joined at the hip, ya know!
- Sideshow Mel: Another tragedy prevented by gun violence!
The Island of Dr. Hibbert
- Marge: The House of Pain? I guess this is where you pay the bill. [laughs] Why am I always funny when no one's around?
- Homer: Oh my God! She's become a monster! Which I have to admit, I sorta suspected during the sex.
- Comic Book Guy (Half-goat): Hear me, accursed brethren! I understand some of you are still wearing tattered pants. Please throw them on the bonfire, and embrace your animal essence.
- Chief Wiggum (Half-pig): Okay, but I'm keeping my tattered vest. I still have my dignity. Hey, slops! [eats slops] Ooohh, a toenail! Heh, Heh! [eats the toenail]
- Homer: You guys are nuts! All you can do is eat and sleep and mate and roll around in your own filth and mate and eat -- [abruptly breaks off] Where do I sign up?
- Lisa: How do you like being a walrus, Dad?
- Homer: It's great! I haven't been this skinny since high school!