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Treehouse of Horror XXIII/Quotes

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Season 24 Episode Quotes
509 "Moonshine River"
510
"Treehouse of Horror XXIII"
"Adventures in Baby-Getting" 511


Mayan Wiggum: Don't worry. We got a guy here we really been fattening up.
Mayan Quimby: Is it you?

Mayan Marge: Oh, my brave, brave glutton. I'll be so lonely when they sacrifice you to the gods.
Mayan Homer: What?! No one said anything about a sacrifice! Although I... I did kind of space out during orientation.

Professor Frink: Oh my god particle!
Mayor Quimby: What is it, Professor?
Professor Frink: You can tell your grandchildren you were here when humanity finally learned that this accelerator is much too small to tell us anything important.

Homer: Lisa! Do you have a stray dog down there?
Lisa: Um, it's a lot worse than a stray dog.
Homer: Two stray dogs?
Lisa: It's a black hole!
Homer: That was gonna be my next guess!
Lisa: Are you sure your next guess wasn't "three stray dogs?"
Homer: Maybe.

Homer: Okay, it's possible that someone may have started a business called "Magic Craphole Waste Removal," but it wasn't me.

Homer: We've bought this camera because strange things have been going on at our house in the dead of night. And if anyone finds this footage after we're all missing or dead, remember me as a hero.
Bart: Dad, you forgot to pick me up after Little League!
Lisa: You tossed your car keys in my bean plant!
Homer: A hero!
Ned Flanders: [off-screen] Homer! Is that my camera?
Homer: Hero away!

Homer: Wanna snuggle?
Marge: Not with the camera on.
Homer: I turned it off.
Marge: Looks like the red light's on.
Homer: I swear, I am not filming. [loud whisper] Note to self: edit out my lies.

Lisa: Why is this happening to us?
Marge: I don't know, I don't know! I'm sure I don't know!
Homer: Oh, sweetie, sometimes a mysterious, invisible being from hell waits for a family to go to sleep then kills them. Now go to bed.

Young Marge: What are you doing?
Teenage Patty: Trying to summon the devil.
Young Marge: Why?
Teenage Patty: Nothing good on TV.
Teenage Selma: We have no boyfriends.
Teenage Patty: We're bored.
Teenage Selma: Something to do.

Homer: Now, before we start what's the safe word?
Moe-looking Satan: Cinnamon.
Homer: Oo! I like that. Now, I'd like to try something new if you don't mind.
Moe-looking Satan: Cinnamon! Cinnamon! Cinnamon!

Bart: Now to get my comic book and explore a world where no one's mad at George Lucas.

Teenage Homer: Who are you?
Bart: I'm your unwanted son from the future, who killed all your fun!

Bart: Now to return to a future where I'm either rich or allowed to stand in front of a rich guy's house. Either way, better than now.

Barty Ziff: My Dad is Artie Ziff?
Artie Ziff: Indeed! Which makes you Barty Ziff!
Barty Ziff: Oy carumba!

Marge Ziff: Lemme get this straight. None of you had time to take out the garbage?
Fop Homer: Make Egyptian Slave Homer do it.
Egyptian Slave Homer: It's always me.
Season 24 Quotes
Moonshine River Treehouse of Horror XXIII Adventures in Baby-Getting Gone Abie Gone Penny-Wiseguys A Tree Grows in Springfield The Day the Earth Stood Cool To Cur, with Love Homer Goes to Prep School A Test Before Trying The Changing of the Guardian Love Is a Many-Splintered Thing Hardly Kirk-ing Gorgeous Grampa Black-Eyed, Please Dark Knight Court What Animated Women Want Pulpit Friction Whiskey Business The Fabulous Faker Boy The Saga of Carl Dangers on a Train