- "They don't call me Colonel Homer because I'm some dumb-ass army guy."
- ―Homer Simpson
| Colonel Homer
| Episode Information
- "After a particularly bad movie experience, Homer drives to a bar where he discovers a singer named Lurleen Lumpkin. Homer becomes her manager (calling himself "Colonel Homer") and helps her launch her musical career. Lurleen's success causes problems in the Simpson household, however, when Homer's manager role causes him to spend large amounts of time away from home and when Marge realizes that Lurleen is attracted to Homer."
Homer and Marge go see The Stockholm Affair at the Springfield Googolplex Theatres after finding out that Look Who's Oinking is sold out. Homer keeps talking throughout the film and angers the audience by revealing the end of the movie. Meanwhile, Bart and Lisa go to watch Space Mutants and Lisa gets scared. After coming out of the theater, Homer is angry at the reaction from Marge and the audience and after dropping off the family, Homer goes for a drive to Spittle County.
After a long drive through Spittle County, Homer finds The Beer -N- Brawl redneck bar. He orders a Fudd Beer from here after finding that they do not serve Duff and then listens to Lurleen Lumpkin's song "Your Wife Don't Understand You". After her song, he speaks to her and introduces himself. Lurleen thanks Homer for complimenting her and they both leave. Back home, Homer is happier than ever because of Lurleen's song and is in a great mood.
Homer eventually goes back to see Lurleen in the Royal King Trailer Park. He then takes Lurleen to record her song at Lucky's Records where the employee, Wade, then asks them if they want to take her CD to KUDD Radio for them to play it. When KUDD plays the song, it is heard all over Springfield and has the same effect as it did on Homer. Fights and quarrels stop all over town and the participants are happy and make up with each other. The song even defuses a prison riot. At Moe's Tavern, Moe says that drinks are on the house. However, Moe's offer rings hollow when the bar proves to be empty except for Barney, who was in the toilets at the time and didn't even hear the offer.
After the success with KUDD, Lurleen asks Homer to be his manager and he accepts. After getting Homer a new outfit at The Corpulent Cowboy, Lurleen starts to record songs at Hicksville U.S.A. Recording Studio. However, Marge isn't happy with all the time Homer is spending with Lurleen, or with Homer's paying a huge amount of money to the recording studio. When the first song Lurleen records is "Bagged Me a Homer", Marge becomes even angrier and gnashes her teeth so loudly that the noise interferes with the recording. The session is still a success, as Lurleen becomes a hit and her record sells so well that Homer has the kids help with the production.
Homer informs Lurleen that she has gotten a deal to appear on the TV show Ya Hoo! and Lurleen states that she wants to sing new songs on it. She then sings "Bunk with Me Tonight", in a sly attempt to seduce Homer. When Homer doesn't get the meaning, she tells him to pay closer attention and re-sings the chorus, placing special emphasis on the lyrics. After he realizes what she is asking, he rejects Lurleen and drives off.
In spite of the seduction attempt, Homer and Lurleen go through with the TV appearance on Ya Hoo!. During the show, Lurleen gets Homer in her dressing room and makes a more blatant attempt, this time kissing him. During the kiss, Homer experiences an epiphany and realizes that if he takes Lurleen up on her offer, he'll lose his family. He then beats a hasty retreat from the dressing room, sells his ownership of Lurleen's contract to another agent for $50, and leaves the Ya Hoo! studio. He goes home to Marge, apologizes and gets into bed with her just in time to see the end of the show on TV. A tearful Lurleen sings a new song, "Stand By Your Manager", which she had just written on the spot. The song describes her attempt to seduce Homer and how he turned her down to return to his family. When she sings the closing lyric, "I hope that Marge knows just how lucky she is", Marge tells Homer that she does.
"Colonel Homer" was written by Matt Groening, the only individual writing credit he has received on the show. "Colonel Homer" was partly based on the 1980 film Coal Miner's Daughter, which tells the story of country music singer Loretta Lynn Groening said he had always wanted to write an episode in which Homer is offered a better life but then chooses his family over glamor at the end. He pitched the idea to the writers of the show, who suggested the parody of Coal Miner's Daughter and also that Homer should become a manager for a country singer.
The episode's director, Mark Kirkland, said he enjoyed directing the episode because the characters' emotions throughout it are "very human and real". He believed many viewers watching the episode would recognize the emotions from experiences in their own lives, and would feel sympathy for the characters.
American singer and actress Beverly D'Angelo guest starred in the episode as Lurleen Lumpkin. D'Angelo wrote two songs for the episode: "Your Wife Don't Understand You" and "Bagged Me a Homer". Unlike most other guest stars on The Simpsons who record their lines and then leave to accommodate their schedule, D'Angelo stayed with the production team all day and pitched several jokes for the episode.
In its original broadcast, "Colonel Homer" finished twenty-second in the ratings for the week of March 23–29, 1992, with a Nielsen rating of 14.8, equivalent to about 16.63 million viewers. It was the highest-rated show on the Fox network that week. The episode has received mainly positive reviews.