Kill Gil, Volumes I & II/Quotes

Quotes

Season 18 Episode Quotes

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386

"The Haw-Hawed Couple"

387
"Kill Gil, Volumes I & II"

"The Wife Aquatic"

388

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Patty Bouvier: Elvis Stojko is so handsome!

Selma Bouvier: He can lace up my skates any time.

Moe Szyslak: Don't you hags know that all male figure skaters are "twinkly in the lutz"?

Elvis Stojko: That's a common misconception! I have a girlfriend in Vancouver!

Moe: Made-up girlfriend, made-up city!

The Grumple: Grumply, grumply groo, I'll throw my net over you!

Marge: Come on, Homer, let's get the kids out of here. Homer?

Homer: [fighting The Grumple] Give back that Holiday Cheer, you bastard!

The Grumple: Never!

Gil Gunderson: Well, what can Ol' Santa bring you for Christmas, son?

Kearney Zzyzwicz: I want a dirt bike, one of those video game chairs that vibrate...

Kearney Zzyzwicz, Jr.: Dad, he's not the real Santa. We can't afford that stuff.

Kearney: Shut up, shut up, shut up!

Gil: Sir, I'm glad I have this chance to talk to you. I've been on the payroll here since May, and I'd really like to start working in Ladies Shoes—not literally of course, I couldn't walk very fast, though I'd learn if that's what it takes...

Marge: You can't go home tonight! It's cold, it's late...

Grampa: Yeah! Maybe I should spend the night here, too.

Homer: You're getting a cab, old man. In fact, I believe I see it now.

Grampa: But I haven't given you a present.

Homer: Your present is leaving.

The Grumple: Grumply, grumply groo, your blood will make my stew!

Homer: Why did you let that loser into our home?

Marge: I'll tell you why: Christian charity.

Homer: Christian Charity? What does a porn star have to do with this?

Marge: And that's why I have trouble saying "no" to people—even Gil!

Homer: Marge, I have no idea what you were just thinking about. Why would you think I did?

Bart: Gil's gone.

Lisa: Back to Scottsdale.

Bart: Problem solved.

Lisa: End of story.

Bart: Can we have pancakes for dinner?

Assistant: Here's a box for your stuff.

Gil: I can't live in this!

← Season 17 Season 18 Quotes Season 19 →
The Mook, the Chef, the Wife and Her Homer • Jazzy and the Pussycats • Please Homer, Don't Hammer 'Em • Treehouse of Horror XVII • G.I. (Annoyed Grunt) • Moe'N'a Lisa • Ice Cream of Margie (with the Light Blue Hair) • The Haw-Hawed Couple • Kill Gil, Volumes I & II • The Wife Aquatic • Revenge Is a Dish Best Served Three Times • Little Big Girl • Springfield Up • Yokel Chords • Rome-Old and Juli-Eh • Homerazzi • Marge Gamer • The Boys of Bummer • Crook and Ladder • Stop, or My Dog Will Shoot! • 24 Minutes • You Kent Always Say What You Want