Margical History Tour
| Margical History Tour
| Episode Information
"Margical History Tour" is the eleventh episode of The Simpsons season 15. The episode aired on February 8, 2004. This is one of several Simpsons episodes which are considered anthology episodes that features mini-stories.
Marge, the kids and Milhouse go to the library where they find there are no longer any books on the shelves. With no books for reference, the kids are in danger of not being able to write their reports. Fortunately, Marge knows some history and relates to the children the following tales:
- Henry VIII (Homer) tries to find a wife that will bear him a son.
- Lewis and Clark (Lenny and Carl) get assistance from Sacagawea (Lisa) in their quest to explore the western territories.
- Mozart (Bart) the musical child prodigy wows them in 18th century Austria, while his sister (Lisa) fights for her own musical identity.
Marge takes Bart, Lisa, and Milhouse to the library to study. The librarian tells Lisa that there are no more books, the library is now a 'multi-media learning center for children of all ages, but mostly bums'. The only items they find in the children's center is "Everybody Poops" the video and Yu-Gi-Oh! price guides. When Milhouse complains about needing a pumpkin sticker or better on a paper about Henry VIII Marge makes the best of the situation by telling stories about history.
King Henry VIII (Homer) is unhappy that his wife, Catherine of Aragon (Marge, spelled as Margerine of Aragon) has borne him a daughter, Mary I (Lisa). Unable to execute Margerine because her father is the king of Spain, Henry attempts marriage counseling. Henry wants a divorce but cannot due to catholic law. He starts the Church of England to make divorce legal, but forgets to invent the prenup. Forcing Henry to split his kingdom. Wanting a son to inherit the throne, Henry marries Anne Boleyn (Lindsey Naegle); nine months later, Anne tearfully apologizes to Henry for having borne him another daughter, Elizabeth I and is summarily executed. Henry goes through many wives, resulting in more and more daughters. Finally, after many years and executions, Henry is old and sick, lying on his bed, with Margerine by his side. He asks for her forgiveness for having locked her up in a dungeon and asks her to be his queen again. She accepts tenderly and then smothers him to death with his pillow.
After the story, Milhouse leaves eagerly to start his report on Henry VIII, only to be tripped by Nelson, who steals Milhouse's notes from Marge's story to use for his own report.
Lewis and Clark and Sacagawea
Meriwether Lewis (Lenny) and William Clark (Carl) are assigned to explore the West by President Thomas Jefferson (Mayor Quimby). They meet a tribe of Native Americans led by Homer as the tribal chief, who offers them the guidance of his daughter, Sacagawea (Lisa). Sacagawea gives them many tips on how to survive the land, including how to scare a cougar, but quickly becomes fed up with Lewis and Clark's antics and stupidity. Finally, she leaves them and sets off back home. She encounters a cougar, but before it can attack, Lewis and Clark save her using the advice she gave them. The party arrives at the Pacific Ocean and a heavy downpour begins, prompting Lewis and Clark to name the rain-soaked place Eugene, Oregon. The two explorers reward Sacagawea by creating the Sacagawea dollar which - Marge explains - can be exchanged at the bank for a real dollar.
Mozart and Salieri
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart (Bart) is a big hit in Vienna, playing sonatas on the grand piano as if he were at a rock concert. Sally Salieri (Lisa) is resentful of Mozart's good fortune, asking why such a fool could have such talent while she who works hard is cast aside. She is especially jealous when Mozart wins the best composer award. Their father (Homer) considers Salieri untalented and their mother (Marge) while not beliving the same as her husband, trusts Mozart more to keep them in luxury. At Mozart's next opera, Salieri serves the Emperor (Charles Montgomery Burns) wine spiked with a sleeping potion. The opera is a success until the crowd hears the Emperor snoring in the balcony which since the otther antendees mindlessly follow the emperor they begin sleeping too. The failure of his opera leads to Mozart's fall from popularity, after which he develops a high fever and becomes deathly ill. At Mozart's deathbed, Salieri tells him she wanted to ruin his life, not kill him. Mozart confesses that he thought highly of Salieri's work, believing that it would be remembered more than his - but his youthful death ensures he and his music will be immortalized forever. He then dies, but not before saying "Eat my pantaloons." The next day, Salieri visits the Emperor's court to submit her musical work, but the court is already focused on Ludwig van Beethoven (Nelson). Befuddled, Salieri hails a carriage to the mental asylum, gets in, and laughs hysterically as the carriage draws away.
Lisa realizes that Marge's telling of the lives of Mozart and Salieri is not the real version, noting that Mozart worked hard on his music and that he and Salieri had better relations in their time, and says that the story is based on the movie Amadeus. Homer says that the person who played Mozart also starred in the film Animal House, which he sings the theme of over the credits.
At the end, Homer says that the guy who played Mozart was also in Animal House and starts singing about how Animal House was a great movie which ended like American Graffiti where it shows pictures of everyone and says what happened to them.
Henry VIII still holds the world turkey-leg-eating record.
Sacagawea went on to great riches posing for butter boxes.
Mozart's burial site is now the most popular gas station in Vienna.
That night, Homer watched Animal House again. He went to work the next day in a toga.