Difference between revisions of "Weekend at Burnsie's/Quotes"
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| − | {{EpisodePrevNextQuo | + | {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Blame It on Lisa|Gump Roast}} |
| − | :''' | + | :'''[[Marge]]:''' I've tried heckling them, I've tried jeckling them, it's time I made myself a scarecrow. |
| − | :''' | ||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | :'''Homer''' | + | :'''[[Homer]]:''' Say doctor, can you do something about my searing pain? |
| − | :''' | + | :'''[[Dr. Hibbert]]:''' Well, there is a medication, although it's a little... controversial. |
| − | :''' | + | :'''Homer:''' Does it go in the butt? |
| − | :''' | + | :'''Dr. Hibbert:''' I'm talkin' about medicinal marijuana. Prescription pot. Texas T-H-C. |
| − | + | :'''Homer:''' Look, man. I don't do drugs. | |
| + | :'''Dr. Hibbert:''' Homer, for your eyes, the best tonic is chronic. | ||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | :'''Homer | + | :'''Homer:''' For me, the sixties ended that day in nineteen seventy-eight. |
| − | :''' | ||
| − | |||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | :'''Homer | + | :'''Homer:''' Okay, let's see: "Toke as needed. Caution: objects may appear more edible than they actually are." |
| − | :''' | ||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | :'''Marge''' | + | :'''Marge:''' ''[on phone]'' Hello? |
| − | :'''Homer''' | + | :'''Homer:''' Marge, I just realized: I am the "ow" in the word "now". And if you tell anyone... |
| − | :'''Marge''' | + | :'''Marge:''' Honey, I like it when you call, but we just talked five minutes ago. Hang on, I've got call waiting. ''[click]'' Hello? |
| − | :'''Homer''' | + | :'''Homer:''' Hey, it's me. I got Marge on the other line and she is totally bumming me out. |
| + | :'''Marge:''' Hmmmm. | ||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | :'''Homer''': Oh | + | :'''[[Ned Flanders]]:''' Hidilly-hey, Homer! |
| + | :'''Homer:''' Oh my God, this dude does the best Flanders! You got the mustache and the didilly... Okay, now do [[Clancy Wiggum|Wiggum]]. | ||
| + | :'''Ned:''' ''[chuckles nervously]'' Homer, i-i-it's me, Ned. | ||
| + | :'''Homer:''' Oh-ho-ho-ho right, the God dude. Hey, I got a question for you. "Could Jesus microwave a burrito so hot, that He Himself could not eat it?" | ||
| + | :'''Ned:''' Well, sir, of course He could... but then again... Wow, as melon-scratchers go, that's a honey-doodle. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | :'''Homer:''' Oops! I thought this was the can, man. ''[giggles]'' | ||
| + | :'''[[Mr. Burns]]:''' Well, you're a Happy Homer. What's your name, young man? | ||
| + | :'''Homer:''' You just said it! ''[laughs hard]'' | ||
| + | :'''Mr. Burns:'' Well, if you liked that, listen to this: "Working hard... or hardly working?" | ||
| + | :'''Homer:''' ''[laughs uncontrollably]'' | ||
| + | :'''Mr. Burns:''' [[Waylon Smithers, Jr.|Smithers]], you could learn a thing or two from this braying moron. Young man, I'm making you my executive vice president. | ||
| + | :'''Smithers:''' Sir, I believe that position was informally promised to me... | ||
| + | :'''Mr. Burns:''' Oh Smithers, I would have said anything to get your stem cells. Now, welcome aboard. | ||
| + | :'''Homer:''' ''[touches Burns' face]'' You're covered with a very fine fuzz. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | :'''Marge:''' Homer, it's over. I want you to look at your children and promise them you will never do drugs again. | ||
| + | :'''Homer:''' All right. I'll do it for my kids. | ||
| + | :'''[[Bart]]:''' As long as you're doin' things for me, would you tie up your bathrobe when you walk around the house. | ||
| + | :'''Homer:''' Never! | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | :'''[[Moe]]:''' Look, I, I'm really glad you're off the wacky tobacky. | ||
| + | :'''[[Lenny]]:''' Yeah, you were gettin' all spacey and everything. We were gonna have an intervention. | ||
| + | :'''[[Carl]]:''' Yeah, but at the planning party I got alcohol poisoning. Heh. I nearly died. | ||
| + | :''[Moe, Carl and Lenny laugh]'' | ||
| + | :'''Moe:''' I was already makin' excuses not to go to your funeral. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | :'''Homer:''' It's been three days. And my mind is clearer, my sperm count is up, and I'm able to recognize simple shapes and patterns. | ||
| + | :'''[[Lisa]]:''' Dad, you just said that three minutes ago. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | :'''Homer:''' Oh, man. Oh, man. We killed Mr. Burns. Mr. Burns is gonna be so mad. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | :'''[[Bill Clinton]]:''' So when somebody says I was an embarrassment to the country, I say it depends on what the meaning of "was" is, jerk. You owe me two hundred thousand dollars. Goodnight, everybody! | ||
| + | :'''Homer:''' Bill Clinton, everyone! He's [[Jimmy Carter]] with a Fox attitude. | ||
{{Season 13|Q}} | {{Season 13|Q}} | ||
Revision as of 10:41, September 4, 2018
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- Marge: I've tried heckling them, I've tried jeckling them, it's time I made myself a scarecrow.
- Homer: Say doctor, can you do something about my searing pain?
- Dr. Hibbert: Well, there is a medication, although it's a little... controversial.
- Homer: Does it go in the butt?
- Dr. Hibbert: I'm talkin' about medicinal marijuana. Prescription pot. Texas T-H-C.
- Homer: Look, man. I don't do drugs.
- Dr. Hibbert: Homer, for your eyes, the best tonic is chronic.
- Homer: For me, the sixties ended that day in nineteen seventy-eight.
- Homer: Okay, let's see: "Toke as needed. Caution: objects may appear more edible than they actually are."
- Marge: [on phone] Hello?
- Homer: Marge, I just realized: I am the "ow" in the word "now". And if you tell anyone...
- Marge: Honey, I like it when you call, but we just talked five minutes ago. Hang on, I've got call waiting. [click] Hello?
- Homer: Hey, it's me. I got Marge on the other line and she is totally bumming me out.
- Marge: Hmmmm.
- Ned Flanders: Hidilly-hey, Homer!
- Homer: Oh my God, this dude does the best Flanders! You got the mustache and the didilly... Okay, now do Wiggum.
- Ned: [chuckles nervously] Homer, i-i-it's me, Ned.
- Homer: Oh-ho-ho-ho right, the God dude. Hey, I got a question for you. "Could Jesus microwave a burrito so hot, that He Himself could not eat it?"
- Ned: Well, sir, of course He could... but then again... Wow, as melon-scratchers go, that's a honey-doodle.
- Homer: Oops! I thought this was the can, man. [giggles]
- Mr. Burns: Well, you're a Happy Homer. What's your name, young man?
- Homer: You just said it! [laughs hard]
- 'Mr. Burns: Well, if you liked that, listen to this: "Working hard... or hardly working?"
- Homer: [laughs uncontrollably]
- Mr. Burns: Smithers, you could learn a thing or two from this braying moron. Young man, I'm making you my executive vice president.
- Smithers: Sir, I believe that position was informally promised to me...
- Mr. Burns: Oh Smithers, I would have said anything to get your stem cells. Now, welcome aboard.
- Homer: [touches Burns' face] You're covered with a very fine fuzz.
- Marge: Homer, it's over. I want you to look at your children and promise them you will never do drugs again.
- Homer: All right. I'll do it for my kids.
- Bart: As long as you're doin' things for me, would you tie up your bathrobe when you walk around the house.
- Homer: Never!
- Moe: Look, I, I'm really glad you're off the wacky tobacky.
- Lenny: Yeah, you were gettin' all spacey and everything. We were gonna have an intervention.
- Carl: Yeah, but at the planning party I got alcohol poisoning. Heh. I nearly died.
- [Moe, Carl and Lenny laugh]
- Moe: I was already makin' excuses not to go to your funeral.
- Homer: It's been three days. And my mind is clearer, my sperm count is up, and I'm able to recognize simple shapes and patterns.
- Lisa: Dad, you just said that three minutes ago.
- Homer: Oh, man. Oh, man. We killed Mr. Burns. Mr. Burns is gonna be so mad.
- Bill Clinton: So when somebody says I was an embarrassment to the country, I say it depends on what the meaning of "was" is, jerk. You owe me two hundred thousand dollars. Goodnight, everybody!
- Homer: Bill Clinton, everyone! He's Jimmy Carter with a Fox attitude.
