Difference between revisions of "Brother from the Same Planet/Quotes"

Latest revision as of 10:16, April 26, 2024

Milhouse Van Houten: Trab pu kcip. Trab pu kcip.

Kirk Van Houten: What have we told you about writing on the walls? Go to your room.

Homer: Hmm, I keep thinking I'm forgetting something.

Crowd: [on television] Bart! Bart! Bart! Bart!

Santa's Little Helper: [barking] Bart Bart! Bart Bart Bart! Bart!

Maggie: [burping] Bart!

Homer: I can't think with all this noise!

Homer's brain: Pick up Bart! Pick up Bart!

Homer: Pigabar? What the hell is pigabar?

Homer: I know you're mad at me right now, and I'm kinda mad too... I mean, we could sit here and try to figure out "who forgot to pick up who" till the cows come home. But let's just say we're both wrong and that'll be that.

Bigger Brothers Agency employee: So the last time you saw your father was six years ago.

Bart: Yeah... he left me out on the curb for the ashman. What a revoltin' development.

Bigger Brothers Agency employee: You brave little soldier. I've been saving someone special for a case like yours.

Homer: Bart's not mad at me.

Marge: He called you a bad father.

Homer: Marge, when kids these days say bad, they mean good. And to shake your booty means to wiggle one's butt. Permit me to demonstrate.

Tom: Your dad ever take you to baseball games?

Bart: Nah, his game was blackjack. He bet our life savings on a single hand.

[flashback]

Dealer: Nineteen.

Homer: Hit me.

Dealer: Twenty.

Homer: Hit me.

Dealer: Twenty-one.

Homer: Hit me.

Dealer: Twenty-two.

Homer: D'oh!

Corey Masterson: [on phone] Hi, you've reached the Corey hotline. $4.95 a minute. Here are some words that rhyme with Corey: Glory. Story. Allegory. Montessori...

Bart: Well... I've been thinking. You've been really great to me... but there's probably some other kid who needs you even more.

Tom: Bart, I could kiss you, if the Bigger Brothers hadn't made me sign a form promising I wouldn't.

Homer: Hello, son. Where have you been?

Bart: Playing with Milhouse.

Homer: No, you haven't! You've been out gallivanting around with that floozy of a bigger brother of yours! Haven't you, haven't you. Look at me.

Bart: Dad, it just kinda happened. You're taking this too hard.

Homer: How would you like me to take it? "Go ahead, Bart, have your fun, I'll be waiting for you?" I'm sorry, I can't do it.

Bigger Brothers Agency employee: And what are your reasons for wanting a little brother?

Homer's brain: Don't say revenge. Don't say revenge.

Homer: Uh... Revenge.

Homer's brain: That's it, I'm getting outta here.

Principal Skinner: Listen to your mother, Lisa. I owe everything I have to my mother's watchful eye... and swift hand. Oh, there's mother now. Watching me. What's that, mother? They have a right to be here. It's school business. I... Mother, that sailor suit doesn't fit anymore!

Marge: I think we should go.

Homer: Come on, Bart. We had our fun. Remember when I used to push you on the swing?

Bart: I was faking it.

Homer: [gasps] Liar!

Bart: Oh yeah? Remember this? "Higher, Dad, higher!... Whee, whee... Push harder, Dad!..."

Homer: Stop it. Stop it. Stop it!

Tom: Come on, Bart. You know better than to talk to strangers.

Homer: For your information, I'm his father!

Tom: His father? The drunk and gambler?

Homer: That's right.

Lou: There's a couple of guys fighting at the Aquarium, Chief.

Chief Wiggum: They still sell those frozen bananas?

Lou: I think so.

Chief Wiggum: Let's roll.

Kent Brockman: This just in, a fist fight is in progress in downtown Springfield. Early reports indicate—and these are very preliminary—that one of the fighters is a giant lizard. [talking to someone off-screen] Do we have a source on this? Uh-huh. A bunch of drunken frat boys? All right. I could use some names. I.P. Freely? [angry noise]