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Difference between revisions of "Simpsons Christmas Stories"

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'''"Simpsons Christmas Stories"''' is the ninth episode of ''[[The Simpsons]]<nowiki>'</nowiki>'' seventeenth season. It aired on [[December 18]], [[2005]]. It is the last episode of the year.
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{{Icons||FE}}
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{{Tab}}
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{{EpisodePrevNext|The Italian Bob|Homer's Paternity Coot}}
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{{Noncanon Episode|reason=[[Grampa]] has a brother who is never mentioned again}}
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{{quote|Okay, Christmas, Christmas... you know how your paper boy always sends you a Christmas card with his home address on it? What's up with that?|[[Homer]]}}
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{{Episode
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|image= Simpson Christmas Stories Promo.jpg
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|number= 365
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|season=17
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|snumber=9
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|prodcode= HABF01
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|airdate= December 18, [[2005]]
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|couchgag= A copy of ''[[The Springfield Shopper]]'' spins into frame with the headline COUCH GAG THRILLS NATION and a picture of the Simpsons on the couch.
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|showrunner1= Al Jean
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|writer= [[Don Payne]]
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|director= [[Steven Dean Moore]]
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}}
  
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==Synopsis==
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"'''Simpsons Christmas Stories'''" is the ninth episode of [[season 17]] of ''[[The Simpsons]]'' and the three-hundred and sixty-fifth episode overall. It originally aired on December 18, [[2005]]. The episode was written by [[Don Payne]] and directed by [[Steven Dean Moore]].
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{{spoiler}}
 
  
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===The First ([[D'oh!|Annoyed Grunt]])-El===
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== Synopsis ==
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When Reverend Lovejoy can't attend the Christmas sermon due to his train set catching on fire, Flanders immediately takes over. However, he gets a paper cut and faints. Homer decides to lead the sermon and tells the story of the first Christmas, with Marge as [[Mary, the Mother of Jesus|Mary]], Homer as [[Saint Joseph|Joseph]], Lisa as the angel [[Gabriel]], Mr. Burns as [[Herod the Great|King Herod]], and Bart as [[Jesus]].
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{{Desc|[[Homer]] tells the tale of the first Christmas ever, [[Grampa]] pursues his decade-old feud with Santa, and the people of Springfield perform The Nutcracker.}}
  
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Mary tells Joseph that she is pregnant, even though she's a virgin. The angel Gabriel appears to them and explains that Mary is going to give birth to the Son of God. The [[Biblical Magi|three wise men]] ([[Dr. Hibbert]], [[Principal Skinner]], and [[Professor Frink]]) tell King Herod that they are going to give [[gold]], [[frankincense]], and [[myrrh]] to the King of the Jews. When Herod thinks that the gifts are for him, the men explain to him that they're for the baby Jesus. Herod becomes angry and claims that he will [[Massacre of the Innocents|kill the baby]].
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== Plot ==
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[[File:Simpsons Christmas Stories promo 2.jpg|thumb|left|Alternate promo image]]
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=== Opening ===
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Everyone is at church for the [[Christmas]] service, but [[Reverend Lovejoy]] is unable to make it because there was a train wreck on his model train set. [[Ned Flanders]] decides to do the Christmas service but gets a paper cut and faints. Homer then takes over the service, telling the story of the first Christmas.
  
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At the Bethlehem Inn, the innkeeper (Moe) tells Mary and Joseph that he has plenty of rooms available with brand new carpeting. However, when Mary's water breaks, he forces them to stay in the barn. Mary successfully gives birth to the baby, and the three wise men, along with the two shepherds (Lenny and Carl) come to see Jesus. Joseph is upset because he isn't Jesus' father, and when he drinks some wine, the baby turns it into water.  
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=== The First D'oh-El ===
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[[Virgin Mary|Mary]] ([[Marge]]) tells [[Saint Joseph|Joseph]] (Homer) that she is pregnant, even though she's a virgin. The angel {{ap|Gabriel|Simpsons Christmas Stories}} ([[Lisa]]) appears to them and explains that Mary is going to give birth to the Son of [[God]]. The three wise men ([[Dr. Hibbert]], [[Principal Skinner]], and [[Professor Frink]]) tell King Herod that they are going to give {{W|gold}}, {{W|frankincense}}, and {{W|myrrh}} to the King of the Jews. When Herod thinks that the gifts are for him, the men explain to him that they're for the baby Jesus. Herod becomes angry and claims that he will {{W|Massacre of the Innocents|kill the baby}}.
  
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When Jesus keeps crying, Mary gives him to Joseph. He entertains him by hurting himself and one of the wise men (Skinner). When Jesus finally falls asleep, Herod and his troops find the manger that they're staying in. They escape and trick the soldiers by putting Jesus' halo on a duck. On top of the hill, Joseph cuts down a pine tree, and as it rolls down, the soldier gets caught in it. The soldiers, along with Herod, are arranged like ornaments on the tree, and the duck, still wearing the halo, stands on top of the tree. Mary calls it a Christmas tree, and Homer concludes his service.
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At the [[Bethlehem Inn]], the innkeeper ([[Moe]]) tells Mary and Joseph that he has plenty of rooms available with brand new carpeting. However, when Mary's water breaks, he forces them to stay in the barn. Mary successfully gives birth to the baby Jesus ([[Bart]]), and the three wise men, along with the two shepherds ([[Lenny]] and [[Carl]]) come to see Jesus. Joseph is upset because he isn't Jesus' father and goes to get drunk. However, baby Jesus turns the wine into water, performing his first miracle.
  
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===I Saw Grampa Cussing Santa Claus===
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When Jesus keeps crying, Mary gives him to Joseph. Joseph entertains him by hurting himself and one of the wise men ([[Principal Skinner]]). When Jesus finally falls asleep, Herod and his troops find the barn that they're staying in. They escape and trick the soldiers by putting Jesus' halo on a duck. On top of the hill, Joseph cuts down a pine tree, and as it rolls down, the soldier gets caught in it. The soldiers, along with Herod, are arranged like ornaments on the tree, and the duck, still wearing the halo, stands on top of the tree. Mary calls it a Christmas tree, as the soldiers in the tree die.
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When Bart and Lisa find Grampa trying to stick a bear trap on top of the chimney, Grampa tells them that he's trying to get his revenge on [[Santa Claus]]. Bart asks why, and to their dismay, Grampa tells them one of his many stories.
 
  
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Back in [[World War II]], Grampa and his brother Cyrus (never mentioned until now) were fighting off [[Japan|Japanese]] planes when Cyrus got shot down. Shortly after, Grampa, who was accompanied by Mr. Burns, also get shot down and are stranded on an island. After a few months, they see a plane in the sky, and Mr. Burns shoots it down. However, when they go over to investigate, they see that it is actually Santa Claus. They build him a new sleigh and gather up all the presents. When Santa is about to leave, Mr. Burns knocks him unconscious with a coconut and flies away in the sleigh and claims that he is going to keep all the presents. Grampa catches up to him on a reindeer and jumps onboard the sleigh. After he beats Mr. Burns with a tricycle, he gives the sleigh back to Santa. As Santa leaves, he tells Grampa that he'll be back in a few days. However, he never comes back, and Grampa has to get off using a [[jet ski]] he [[Gilligan's Island|made out of coconuts]].
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=== Wraparound ===
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The church service ends and everyone goes back home. At the Simpson house, Bart and Lisa watch the ''[[Energizer Bunny Christmas Special]]''. They then hear rustling coming from the chimney and assume it's [[Santa]].
  
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Bart and Lisa believe that it's just another one of Grampa's far-fetched tales, but when they hear a thump in the den, they find that Santa is there. He tells them that Cyrus didn't die, but instead crashed into [[Tahiti]]. Santa takes Grampa there, and they meet up with Cyrus and his [[polygamy|fifteen wives]]. Santa explains to Grampa that he didn't come back for him on the island due to his [[procrastination]] and eventually feeling embarrassed about it.
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=== I Saw Grampa Cussing Santa Claus ===
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[[File:Simpson Christmas Stories Santa.png|200px|right|thumb|Santa sees Mr. Burns has been tied up by Grampa.]]
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Bart and Lisa instead find Grampa in the chimney, who is trying to lay a trap for Santa. Grampa tells them that he's trying to get his revenge on Santa Claus. Bart asks why, and to their dismay, Grampa tells them one of his many stories.
  
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===The Nutcracker...Sweet===
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Back in [[World War II]], Grampa and his brother [[Cyrus Simpson|Cyrus]] were Navy pilots together. Cyrus showed Grampa his good luck charm, a pocket watch he stole off an enemy soldier. The pocket watch gets shot, but he reveals that he stole two. The enemy attacks so Grampa and Cyrus get in their planes and fly after them. Cyrus gets shot down after [[Mr. Burns]] refuses to use the radio to tell Cyrus to watch his back. Grampa and Burns then also crash into an island, but they both survive. Grampa attacks Burns to show him who's boss and then they live on the island together.
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After the children of Springfield Elementary perform ''[[The Nutcracker]]'', everyone begins to go along their day singing to the tune of the songs from the play. This is done after mentioning that the songs in ''The Nutcracker'' are in the [[public domain]] and thus can be and are played constantly for free. After the opening number (sung to the tune of "Marche"), Moe continues his holiday tradition and attempts [[suicide]] thrice, and naturally, fails (done to the tune of "Dance of the Flutes").
 
  
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That evening, Marge tells Homer that he'll like the present that she got him. Not wanting to upset her, Homer tells her that his present for her is outside and goes to buy her a present (sung to the tune of "Trepak"). Every store is closed, and all Apu has at the Kwik-E-Mart is some [[beef jerky|jerky]] made out of [[trout]]. Homer searches in garbage cans, gutters, trees, and he even chases down Milhouse, but he can't find anything.
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After a few months, they see a plane in the sky, and Mr. Burns shoots it down, wanting to shoot something down on Christmas. However, when they go over to investigate, they see that it is actually Santa Claus. They build him a new sleigh and gather up all the presents. When Santa is about to leave, Mr. Burns knocks him unconscious with a coconut and flies away in the sleigh and says that he is going to keep all the presents for himself. Grampa catches up to him on a reindeer that got left behind and jumps aboard the sleigh. After he beats Mr. Burns with a tricycle, he gives the sleigh back to Santa. As Santa leaves, he tells Grampa that he'll be back in a few days to rescue them. However, he never comes back, and Grampa has to get off the island using a jet ski he made out of coconuts.
  
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When he gets home, Marge gives Homer his present (done to "Pas De Deux"). He opens it and sees that it is another present with a tag that reads, "To Marge, From Homer." Marge tells him that she knew that he would forget to give her a present, so she gave him one to give to her. He gives it to her and she unwraps it, and Homer sees that it is a picture of him dressed up as Santa with Marge on his lap. They hug and kiss, and Moe, for the fourth time, attempts suicide by riding on a sleigh in the road, and missing an eighteen-wheel semi.
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Bart and Lisa believe that it's just another one of Grampa's far-fetched tales, but when they hear a thump in the den, they find that Santa is there. He tells them that Cyrus didn't die, but instead crashed into [[Tahiti]]. Santa takes Grampa there, and they meet up with Cyrus and his [[Cyrus's 15 wives|fifteen wives]]. Cyrus tells Grampa that he didn't want to leave Tahiti after landing there. Santa then explains to Grampa that he didn't come back for him on the island due to putting it off and eventually feeling embarrassed about it.
  
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==Trivia==
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=== The Nutcracker...Sweeeeet ===
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*In Tahiti, there is a girl resembling "Lisa Jr." from ''[[Missionary: Impossible]]''.
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[[File:Grampa's Christmas with Racoons.png|200px|left|thumb]]
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[[File:Simpson Christmas Stories Homer and Marge.png|200px|right|thumb|Homer and Marge in front of the fire.]]
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The children of [[Springfield Elementary School]] are performing ''The Nutcracker'', which bores the audience. When they finish, Homer declares that it's time to leave, but [[Mr. Largo]] says that it's only intermission. Everyone leaves anyway, leaving the children to play to an empty audience. After the play, Homer says that he doesn't want to hear the music again, and Lisa tells him that it's around all the time because it's free to use. The people of Springfield then sing "[[The Simpson's Public Domain Christmas Song]]", set to the tune of "Marche". At the end of the song, the family pretends that they're away from home so Grampa goes to spend Christmas with the raccoons.
  
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*The voice of Santa Claus in Grampa's story greatly resembles the voice of [[List of recurring robot characters from Futurama#Robot Santa|Robot Santa]] from Matt Groening's other animated show ''[[Futurama]]''.
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On {{Krusty show}}, [[Krusty]] shows off a clip from a 1964 Christmas episode where he gets pelted by snowballs from the audience. [[Moe]] was watching the episode and then goes to do his Christmas tradition, trying to kill himself. However, Moe is unsuccessful in all his attempts. Moe then cooks dinner for him and Barney and asks Barney to kill him as a special gift for him. Barney then tells Moe that he got him a wool hat, and Moe decides that maybe he'll try again next year.
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*This marks the 365th episode, making it able for a different episode to air every day of the year (except in [[leap years]]).
 
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*When we see [[Reverend Lovejoy]] talk about "so many plastic Christmases ruined", one of the figures lying on the table is [[Mr. Burns]].
 
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*This is one of the few episodes where there are three mini-stories, the most common ones being the "[[Treehouse of Horror]]" episodes.
 
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*The fourth episode of The Simpsons to date to air with a parental advisory warning before the episode in [[Australia]] for "adult themes". (Originally scheduled to air May 9th 2006 on [[Network Ten]], but was pre-empted and replaced with "[[How I Spent My Strummer Vacation]]")
 
  
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==Cultural Refrences==
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At the Simpsons house, Marge goes to give Homer her gift to him. Homer tells Marge that his gift to her is outside, then panics, trying to get Marge a last minute gift. However, everywhere is closed or sold out. Homer then returns home, feeling sad. Marge gives her gift to Homer and he opens it, revealing another gift inside. Homer reads the tag and finds that it's a gift from Homer to Marge. Marge explains that she knew Homer would forget, so her gift to Homer was a gift for Homer to give to her. Marge opens the present to reveal a picture of Homer dressed as Santa with Marge in his lap, which she loves. Moe then sleds by towards an 18-wheel truck, and all the wheels miss him.
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*Homer amuses Bart with [[Three Stooges]] gags.
 
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*Homer ends his [[Christmas]] sermon with a terrible imitation of [[The Rest of the Story|Paul Harvey]].
 
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*Krusty's sidekick in [[1964]] bears a striking resemblance to [[Woody Allen]], though his hairdo is very much like [[Sideshow Mel]]'s.
 
  
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==Quotes==
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== Production ==
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===The First (Annoyed Grunt)-El===
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Episode writer [[Don Payne]] came up with the idea to use the Simpsons in the roles of the Bible characters for "The First D'oh-El".<ref name="Jean">{{Com|Jean, Al|Simpsons Christmas Stories|Seventeenth|(2014).}}</ref> [[Kevin Curran]] pitched the joke where Joseph (Homer) was watching the Orange Bowl.<ref name="Curran">{{Com|Curran, Kevin|Simpsons Christmas Stories|Seventeenth|(2014).}}</ref> The scene with the fir tree rolling down the hill at the soldiers had to be given to an experienced animator to do because it required so many different talents to get right.<ref name="Moore">{{Com|Moore, Steven Dean|Simpsons Christmas Stories|Seventeenth|(2014).}}</ref>
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*'''Flanders:''' ''(answering his cell phone)'' Christ is born, who's in my horn?<br/>'''Reverend Lovejoy:''' Bad news, Ned. There's been a horrible train wreck. ''(the camera zooms out and it's seen that his toy train has caught on fire due to a miniature Christmas tree falling on it)'' ''(puts down his cell phone)'' So many little plastic Christmases ruined.<br/>'''Flanders:''' ''(gasps)'' You want ''me'' to deliver the Christmas sermon? ''(puts down his cell phone)'' Oh, I feel like I'm [[born again]] again! ''(runs up to the front of the church and rips off his suit, revealing that he's wearing a minister's outfit underneath)'' ''(he runs up to the altar and takes out some paper)'' Now don't be nervous, Ned. You've practiced this so many times in the shower. ''(grabs one of the papers and cuts his finger)'' Aah, paper cut! ''(he faints)''
 
  
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*'''Marge:''' Joseph, you know I have never lain with a man. <br/> '''Homer (sarcastically):''' Tell me about it.
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The plane fight scene was animated as two separate shots which were then composited together. It's easier to do them as two separate shots, with the background and foreground (Abe and Burns' plane) shots done separately, and then later composited together. The reindeer and sleigh chase scene was also challenging to animate as there were a lot of different moving objects in the scene.<ref name="Moore"/> Al Jean regrets that they had Grampa meet Santa and Cyrus again in the present, feeling that the segment should have ended after Grampa found the watch. Jean and the other writers have said that the episode is non-canonical.<ref name="Jean"/>
  
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*'''Homer as Joseph:''' A pregnant virgin? That's every man's worst nightmare!
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<gallery>
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File:HABF01 Script.jpg
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</gallery>
  
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*'''Lisa:''' Hail Mary, full of grace. <br/> '''Homer (under his breath):''' That's not all she's full of. <br/> '''Lisa:''' ''(to Homer)'' Quiet, you! ''(to both)'' Mary, you carry in your womb the son of God, who will grow up to become [[King of the Jews]]. <br/> '''Marge:''' ''(disappointed)'' So, not a [[Physician|doctor]]. <br/> '''Lisa:''' Well, he will be able to heal the sick. <br/> '''Marge:''' But nothing to hang on the wall?
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== Reception ==
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It was watched by 9.8 million viewers on its premiere in the US.<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20090321221542/http://www.simpsonschannel.com/2005/12/ratings-simpsons-Christmas-stories/ Simpsons Channel - "Ratings: Simpsons Christmas Stories"] (archived on {{W|Wayback Machine}})</ref>
  
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*'''Hibbert:''' King Herod, we three wise men come bearing gifts for the King of the Jews. We bring gold... <br/> '''Skinner:''' ...frankincense... <br/> '''Frink:''' ...and myrrh, which I am re-gifting, 'cause who needs myrrh? Here's the tag. ''(close-up of the gift card, which has Frink's name crossed out and instead has "King of the Jews")''<br/>'''Mr. Burns as King Herod:''' Which one should I open first? <br/> '''Skinner (pause):''' Well, this is awkward. Uh, the King of the Jews we seek is a new born child. <br/> '''Burns:''' Find this pretender to my throne and bring him to me! <br/> '''Frink:''' Now, you wouldn't hurt the little boy-chick, would you? <br/> '''Burns:''' Gentlemen, kings don't hurt babies. Giant pointy swords hurt babies!
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"Simpsons Christmas Stories" was nominated for a [[2007]] Writers Guild of America award in Animation, but it lost to "[[The Italian Bob]]".<ref>[https://www.imdb.com/event/ev0000710/2007/1/ IMDb - "Writers Guild of America, USA 2007 Awards"]</ref>
  
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*'''[[Bethlehem]] Inn sign:''' Welcome class of 20 B.C.
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As of November 2020, the episode has a 6.8 rating on {{W|IMDb}}<ref>[https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0782576/ IMDb - "Simpsons Christmas Stories"]</ref> and a 8.0 rating on {{W|TV.com}}.<ref>[http://www.tv.com/shows/the-simpsons/simpsons-christmas-stories-530745/ TV.com - "Simpsons Christmas Stories"]</ref>
  
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*'''Moe as the innkeeper:''' Now don't you worry, I've got plenty of rooms in my inn. ''(gives Joseph a key)'' All with brand new carpeting.<br/>'''Marge as Mary:''' I think my water just broke!<br/>'''Innkeeper:''' ''(takes their key and gestures outside)'' You can have the barn. Now feel free to come by the mainhouse for breakfast. ''(frowning)'' There won't be any.
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== References ==
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{{Reflist}}
  
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*'''Dr. Nick:''' [[Shalom]], everybody! <br/> '''Animals (translated):''' Shalom, Dr. Nick!
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{{Images|ep=yes}}
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{{season 17}}
  
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*'''Lenny as a shepherd:''' ''(holding Jesus' nose)'' ''(playfully)'' I've got the Messiah's nose! I've got the Messiah's nose! ''(takes his hand away)''<br/>'''Carl as a shepherd:''' Give it back, give it back, you'll kill us all!
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[[Category:2005]]
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[[Category:Anthology episodes]]
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[[Category:Christmas episodes]]
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[[Category:Religion-themed episodes]]
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[[Category:Flashback episodes]]
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[[Category:WGA Award nominated episodes]]
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[[Category:Episodes written by Don Payne]]
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[[Category:Episodes directed by Steven Dean Moore]]
  
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*'''Homer as Joseph:''' Oh, this is the worst Christmas ever!
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[[sv:Simpson Christmas Stories]]
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*'''Lisa as the Angel:''' ''(as Homer moves in to strangle Bart)'' Joseph, no! He has to stay alive till he's thirty-three when he'll be renounced by his friends and [[Crucifixion|crucified]]!<br/>'''Bart as Baby Jesus:''' Huh?<br/>'''Lisa as the Angel:''' Hey, sorry, kid.
 
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*'''Homer:''' Oh, a wise man, eh? Pick two. ''(holds up hand. Skinner picks two of his fingers and Homer jabs them into his eyes)''
 
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*'''Frink:''' King Herod has come for the child! Manger danger! Manger danger!
 
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*'''Caligatus Lou:''' Gee, chief, I feel pretty bad trying to take out a baby. <br/> '''[[Centurion]] Wiggum:''' Ah, don't worry, boys. [[Gospel|No one will ever speak or write of this again]]. <br/> ''(we then see [[Matthew the Evangelist]], with a [[Scroll (parchment)|scroll]] entitled "[[Gospel of Matthew|The Gospel According to Matthew]]")'' <br/> '''Matthew (begins writing):''' What a boffo beginning for my [[book]]!
 
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*''(Homer/Joseph cuts down a large tree, which rolls over the Romans and Herod. The duck flies to the top of the tree)'' <br/> '''Homer:''' What a lovely [[Hanukkah bush]]! <br/> '''Marge:''' Let's call it a "Christmas tree". ''(the Roman troops go "ahhhh")'' <br/> '''Wiggum:''' Christmas tree. Such a great name. Makes ya feel all warm and fuzzy. ''(dies)''
 
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*'''Homer:''' And did you know...that little baby Jesus grew up to be...Jesus? ''(everyone gasps)'' I know, it's weird, isn't it?
 
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===I saw Grampa Cussing Santa Claus===
 
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*'''Lisa (just before Grampa goes into a story):''' Oh, Bart, why'd you ask him a follow-up question? <br/> '''Bart:''' It just slipped out!
 
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*'''Cyrus:''' Now lets win this war quick, Abe, so we can go home and slowly give black folks some [[Civil Rights Movement|more rights]].
 
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*'''Cyrus:''' [[Kamikaze]]s at two o'clock! <br/> '''Young Grampa:''' ''(looking at his watch)'' Well, I don't usually drink after lunch, but... ''(looks up)'' Oh my God, the sky is full of that kind of plane that crashes into the boat!
 
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*'''Grampa:''' Cyrus, you be careful up there. <br/> '''Cyrus:''' I'm not worried. Not as long as I have my [[good luck]] charm. ''(holds out his charm, a [[pocketwatch]] that plays music. It is then smashed by [[machine gun]] fire. Cyrus gets another watch out.)'' Good thing I stole two of these off dead soldiers.
 
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*'''Grampa (voice-over):''' Days turned to weeks. Weeks turned to months. Months turned back to days.
 
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*'''Young Grampa:''' What in the name of the [[Tennessee Valley Authority]]!
 
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*'''Young Grampa:''' Is it one of ours? <br/> '''Burns:''' Who cares, it's Christmas. I wanna shoot something!
 
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*'''Santa:''' Donder! Blitzen! <br/> '''Burns (gets out a [[pistol]]):''' He's [[Germany|German]]. That's good eatin'. ''(aims his gun)''  <br/> '''Young Grampa (pushes down the gun):''' You moron! That ain't no [[kraut]]! We just shot down Santie Claus!
 
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*'''Santa:''' Sorry boys. I must have hit some bad weather. <br/> '''Burns (sarcastically):''' Sure, everything bad happens to ''you''!
 
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*'''Santa:''' My sleigh! It's ruined!<br/>'''Grandpa: '''Don't worry. We'll help you get it up and running, or my name ain't Young Grandpa Simpson.
 
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*'''Santa:''' Thanks for your help, Abe. And now I'm off. I'll be back in a few days to take you ho-ho-home! ''(flies off)'' <br/> '''Young Grampa:''' Well, that's the craziest thing I'll ever see. ''(sees an [[atomic bomb]] explode in the distance)'' Wooh, except for that!
 
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*'''Grampa:''' I waited and waited, but Santa never returned. If I hadn't invented a jet ski made out of [[coconut]]s, I would never have gotten off that island. And when I did, the war was over and the [[nurse]]s were all kissed out.
 
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*'''Santa:''' If you like, I can take you to see your brother now. <br/> '''Grampa:''' Will we be back in time for the [[Tournament of Roses Parade]]? <br/> '''Santa:''' Probably not. <br/> '''Grampa:''' Good, I hate that crap. <br/> '''Santa:''' Yeah, me too.
 
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*'''Cyrus:''' Sorry I never called, Abe. I've been too busy with my fifteen native [[wife|wives]]. ''(Cyrus' fifteen wives walk over and start giggling)'' <br/> '''Grampa:''' Fifteen? Boy, that sounds like a lot of [[sexual intercourse|sex]]! <br/> '''Cyrus:''' I said wives, not [[girlfriend]]s.
 
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===The Nutcracker...Sweet===
 
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*'''Springfield Elementary School sign:''' ''The Nutcracker<br/>"Perhaps the worst version ever" - Superintendent Chalmers<br/>No leaving after your kid's part is done''
 
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*'''Homer:''' Oh my God, it's over! We're free!<br/> '''Mr. Largo:''' It's not over. It's just intermisson.<br/> '''Homer:''' I said we're free! ''(the parents quickly left)''<br/> '''Mr. Largo:''' We're still doing Act Two. I'll be the audience. ''(they started Act Two)'' Boo! This is terrible!
 
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*'''Krusty (in old episode):''' It's the most wonderful time of the year... ''(gets hit in the crotch several times by snowballs)'' Take some snowballs to the groin, she said! It'll be funny, she said! ''(his special guests, [[John Glenn]] and [[Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.]] laugh)''
 
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*''(at Christmas Eve, Moe tries to kill himself with a pistol to his head. Instead, a pole goes through his head and a flag comes down with "And to all a good night" written on it)'' <br/> '''Moe:''' What's it say?
 
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*'''Moe:''' Hey, Barn, as a special gift to me this year, will you kill me? <br/> '''Barney:''' But I already got you a wool hat. ''(hold up a hat with "Moe" on the front)'' <br/> '''Moe:''' ''(puts on hat)'' ''(happily)'' Maybe next year, huh?
 
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*'''Moe:''' Eighteen wheels, and they all miss me!
 
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==Songs from "The Nutcracker...Sweet"==
 
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*'''(tune of the Nutcracker)'''<br/> '''Marge:'''<br/> I've still gotta bake my Christmas pie<br/> '''Bart:'''<br/> I've gotta Dad get a lousy tie<br/> '''Cletus:'''<br/> Christmas crowds is what I hate<br/> '''Sideshow Mel:'''<br/> No time left to procrastinate<br/> '''Lenny:'''<br/> So move your ass<br/> '''Carl:'''<br/> And let me pass<br/> '''Lenny & Carl:'''<br/> 'Cause Christmas Eve is here <br/> '''Mayor Quimby:'''<br/> Er, why is this Santa suit so snug?<br/> '''Mr. Burns'''<br/> Grr, why should I care? It's all humbug<br/> '''Apu:'''<br/> I jacked my prices up so high,<br/> But there's no junk these saps wouldn't buy,<br/> Last year egg nog, a green hot dog<br/> '''Apu, Principal Skinner, Agnes Skinner, Jimbo, Kearney, Dolph, Barney:'''<br/> 'Cause Chirstmas Eve is here<br/>============================ <br/> '''Comic Book Guy:'''<br/> These holiday cookies swell my fat<br/> '''Crazy Cat Woman:'''<br/> (singing in gibberish) Cat<br/> '''Krusty:'''<br/> Even though we're not Gentile,<br/> We'll get together for a while<br/> '''Old Jewish Man:'''<br/> To shoot the breeze<br/> '''Krusty's Father:'''<br/> And eat Chinese<br/> '''Jewish People and Chinese waiter:'''<br/> 'Cause Christmas Eve is here, oy!<br/> '''Marge:'''<br/> Christmas is a family day<br/> '''Homer:'''<br/> I told Grampa we'd be away<br/> '''Lisa:'''<br/> He's at the door<br/> '''Bart:'''<br/> Let's hit the floor<br/> '''Simpson Family (whispering):'''<br/> 'Cause Christmas Eve is here
 
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*'''(tune to the Russican Dance)'''<br/> '''Homer:'''<br/> I need a present for wife,<br/> Or I'll have no sex for life<br/> Diamond ring, a vase by Ming,<br/> Some kind of useful kitchen thing<br/> I need a store that I can break into,<br/> Or a place run by a Hindu<br/> '''Apu:'''<br/> The Christmas rush has cleaned me out,<br/> I just have jerky made of trout
 
−
 
 
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==Broadcasting Information==
 
−
'''[[United States|USA]]/[[Canada]]'''
 
−
*'''1st Airdate:''' Sunday, [[December 18]], [[2005]]
 
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*'''2nd Airdate:''' Sunday, [[February 5]], [[2006]]
 
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'''[[United Kingdom|UK]]'''
 
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*'''1st Airdate:''' Sunday, [[December 25]], [[2005]]
 
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*'''2nd Airdate:''' Wednesday, [[December 28]], [[2005]] (Encore Screening)
 
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*'''3rd Airdate:''' Friday, [[December 30]], [[2005]]
 
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*'''4th Airdate:''' Saturday, [[June 24]], [[2006]]
 
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*'''5th Airdate:''' Friday, [[August 11]], [[2006]]
 
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'''[[Australia]]'''
 
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*'''1st Airdate:''' Tuesday, [[June 6]], [[2006]]
 

Latest revision as of 12:23, April 14, 2024

Season 17 Episode
← 364 "The Italian Bob"
365
"Simpsons Christmas Stories"
"Homer's Paternity Coot" 366 →
Donut Homer.png This episode is considered non-canon and the events featured do not relate to the series and therefore may not have actually happened/existed.

The reason behind this decision is: Grampa has a brother who is never mentioned again.

If you dispute this, please bring it up on the episode's talk page.

"Okay, Christmas, Christmas... you know how your paper boy always sends you a Christmas card with his home address on it? What's up with that?"
―Homer
"Simpsons Christmas Stories"
Simpson Christmas Stories Promo.jpg
Episode Information
Episode number: 365
Season number: S17 E9
Production code: HABF01
Original airdate: December 18, 2005
Couch gag: A copy of The Springfield Shopper spins into frame with the headline COUCH GAG THRILLS NATION and a picture of the Simpsons on the couch.
Showrunner: Al Jean
Written by: Don Payne
Directed by: Steven Dean Moore


"Simpsons Christmas Stories" is the ninth episode of season 17 of The Simpsons and the three-hundred and sixty-fifth episode overall. It originally aired on December 18, 2005. The episode was written by Don Payne and directed by Steven Dean Moore.

Synopsis[edit]

"Homer tells the tale of the first Christmas ever, Grampa pursues his decade-old feud with Santa, and the people of Springfield perform The Nutcracker."


Plot[edit]

Alternate promo image

Opening[edit]

Everyone is at church for the Christmas service, but Reverend Lovejoy is unable to make it because there was a train wreck on his model train set. Ned Flanders decides to do the Christmas service but gets a paper cut and faints. Homer then takes over the service, telling the story of the first Christmas.

The First D'oh-El[edit]

Mary (Marge) tells Joseph (Homer) that she is pregnant, even though she's a virgin. The angel Gabriel (Lisa) appears to them and explains that Mary is going to give birth to the Son of God. The three wise men (Dr. Hibbert, Principal Skinner, and Professor Frink) tell King Herod that they are going to give gold, frankincense, and myrrh to the King of the Jews. When Herod thinks that the gifts are for him, the men explain to him that they're for the baby Jesus. Herod becomes angry and claims that he will kill the baby.

At the Bethlehem Inn, the innkeeper (Moe) tells Mary and Joseph that he has plenty of rooms available with brand new carpeting. However, when Mary's water breaks, he forces them to stay in the barn. Mary successfully gives birth to the baby Jesus (Bart), and the three wise men, along with the two shepherds (Lenny and Carl) come to see Jesus. Joseph is upset because he isn't Jesus' father and goes to get drunk. However, baby Jesus turns the wine into water, performing his first miracle.

When Jesus keeps crying, Mary gives him to Joseph. Joseph entertains him by hurting himself and one of the wise men (Principal Skinner). When Jesus finally falls asleep, Herod and his troops find the barn that they're staying in. They escape and trick the soldiers by putting Jesus' halo on a duck. On top of the hill, Joseph cuts down a pine tree, and as it rolls down, the soldier gets caught in it. The soldiers, along with Herod, are arranged like ornaments on the tree, and the duck, still wearing the halo, stands on top of the tree. Mary calls it a Christmas tree, as the soldiers in the tree die.

Wraparound[edit]

The church service ends and everyone goes back home. At the Simpson house, Bart and Lisa watch the Energizer Bunny Christmas Special. They then hear rustling coming from the chimney and assume it's Santa.

I Saw Grampa Cussing Santa Claus[edit]

Santa sees Mr. Burns has been tied up by Grampa.

Bart and Lisa instead find Grampa in the chimney, who is trying to lay a trap for Santa. Grampa tells them that he's trying to get his revenge on Santa Claus. Bart asks why, and to their dismay, Grampa tells them one of his many stories.

Back in World War II, Grampa and his brother Cyrus were Navy pilots together. Cyrus showed Grampa his good luck charm, a pocket watch he stole off an enemy soldier. The pocket watch gets shot, but he reveals that he stole two. The enemy attacks so Grampa and Cyrus get in their planes and fly after them. Cyrus gets shot down after Mr. Burns refuses to use the radio to tell Cyrus to watch his back. Grampa and Burns then also crash into an island, but they both survive. Grampa attacks Burns to show him who's boss and then they live on the island together.

After a few months, they see a plane in the sky, and Mr. Burns shoots it down, wanting to shoot something down on Christmas. However, when they go over to investigate, they see that it is actually Santa Claus. They build him a new sleigh and gather up all the presents. When Santa is about to leave, Mr. Burns knocks him unconscious with a coconut and flies away in the sleigh and says that he is going to keep all the presents for himself. Grampa catches up to him on a reindeer that got left behind and jumps aboard the sleigh. After he beats Mr. Burns with a tricycle, he gives the sleigh back to Santa. As Santa leaves, he tells Grampa that he'll be back in a few days to rescue them. However, he never comes back, and Grampa has to get off the island using a jet ski he made out of coconuts.

Bart and Lisa believe that it's just another one of Grampa's far-fetched tales, but when they hear a thump in the den, they find that Santa is there. He tells them that Cyrus didn't die, but instead crashed into Tahiti. Santa takes Grampa there, and they meet up with Cyrus and his fifteen wives. Cyrus tells Grampa that he didn't want to leave Tahiti after landing there. Santa then explains to Grampa that he didn't come back for him on the island due to putting it off and eventually feeling embarrassed about it.

The Nutcracker...Sweeeeet[edit]

Grampa's Christmas with Racoons.png
Homer and Marge in front of the fire.

The children of Springfield Elementary School are performing The Nutcracker, which bores the audience. When they finish, Homer declares that it's time to leave, but Mr. Largo says that it's only intermission. Everyone leaves anyway, leaving the children to play to an empty audience. After the play, Homer says that he doesn't want to hear the music again, and Lisa tells him that it's around all the time because it's free to use. The people of Springfield then sing "The Simpson's Public Domain Christmas Song", set to the tune of "Marche". At the end of the song, the family pretends that they're away from home so Grampa goes to spend Christmas with the raccoons.

On The Krusty the Clown Show, Krusty shows off a clip from a 1964 Christmas episode where he gets pelted by snowballs from the audience. Moe was watching the episode and then goes to do his Christmas tradition, trying to kill himself. However, Moe is unsuccessful in all his attempts. Moe then cooks dinner for him and Barney and asks Barney to kill him as a special gift for him. Barney then tells Moe that he got him a wool hat, and Moe decides that maybe he'll try again next year.

At the Simpsons house, Marge goes to give Homer her gift to him. Homer tells Marge that his gift to her is outside, then panics, trying to get Marge a last minute gift. However, everywhere is closed or sold out. Homer then returns home, feeling sad. Marge gives her gift to Homer and he opens it, revealing another gift inside. Homer reads the tag and finds that it's a gift from Homer to Marge. Marge explains that she knew Homer would forget, so her gift to Homer was a gift for Homer to give to her. Marge opens the present to reveal a picture of Homer dressed as Santa with Marge in his lap, which she loves. Moe then sleds by towards an 18-wheel truck, and all the wheels miss him.

Production[edit]

Episode writer Don Payne came up with the idea to use the Simpsons in the roles of the Bible characters for "The First D'oh-El".[1] Kevin Curran pitched the joke where Joseph (Homer) was watching the Orange Bowl.[2] The scene with the fir tree rolling down the hill at the soldiers had to be given to an experienced animator to do because it required so many different talents to get right.[3]

The plane fight scene was animated as two separate shots which were then composited together. It's easier to do them as two separate shots, with the background and foreground (Abe and Burns' plane) shots done separately, and then later composited together. The reindeer and sleigh chase scene was also challenging to animate as there were a lot of different moving objects in the scene.[3] Al Jean regrets that they had Grampa meet Santa and Cyrus again in the present, feeling that the segment should have ended after Grampa found the watch. Jean and the other writers have said that the episode is non-canonical.[1]

  • HABF01 Script.jpg

Reception[edit]

It was watched by 9.8 million viewers on its premiere in the US.[4]

"Simpsons Christmas Stories" was nominated for a 2007 Writers Guild of America award in Animation, but it lost to "The Italian Bob".[5]

As of November 2020, the episode has a 6.8 rating on IMDb[6] and a 8.0 rating on TV.com.[7]

References[edit]

  1. ↑ 1.0 1.1 Jean, Al (2014). Commentary for "Simpsons Christmas Stories", in The Simpsons: The Complete Seventeenth Season.
  2. ↑ Curran, Kevin (2014). Commentary for "Simpsons Christmas Stories", in The Simpsons: The Complete Seventeenth Season.
  3. ↑ 3.0 3.1 Moore, Steven Dean (2014). Commentary for "Simpsons Christmas Stories", in The Simpsons: The Complete Seventeenth Season.
  4. ↑ Simpsons Channel - "Ratings: Simpsons Christmas Stories" (archived on Wayback Machine)
  5. ↑ IMDb - "Writers Guild of America, USA 2007 Awards"
  6. ↑ IMDb - "Simpsons Christmas Stories"
  7. ↑ TV.com - "Simpsons Christmas Stories"


The Saga of Carl - title screen.png Wikisimpsons has a collection of images related to "Simpsons Christmas Stories".
Season 17 Episodes
The Bonfire of the Manatees • The Girl Who Slept Too Little • Milhouse of Sand and Fog • Treehouse of Horror XVI • Marge's Son Poisoning • See Homer Run • The Last of the Red Hat Mamas • The Italian Bob • Simpsons Christmas Stories • Homer's Paternity Coot • We're on the Road to D'ohwhere • My Fair Laddy • The Seemingly Never-Ending Story • Bart Has Two Mommies • Homer Simpson, This Is Your Wife • Million-Dollar Abie • Kiss Kiss Bang Bangalore • The Wettest Stories Ever Told • Girls Just Want to Have Sums • Regarding Margie • The Monkey Suit • Marge and Homer Turn a Couple Play
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