Pulpit Friction/Quotes
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- Marge: Are there any two wordsmore exciting than "couch shopping"?
- Homer: No need. Already went online and ordered a new couch just like the old one. :Homer: And, you know, Marge, those salespeople weren't really our friends.
- Marge: But they let me take fabric samples.
- Homer: They charged a deposit.
- Marge: They had to. It came from corporate.
- Homer: That's right, sweetie, it always comes from corporate.
- Marge: How did we get bedbugs?
- Homer: Probably one of Bart's dirty friends. Boy, why are your friends so dirty?
- Bart: Don't know. Why are your friends such drunks?
- Homer: Touché.
- Lisa: You never know, Mom. I'm only eight. I might get married someday, even if it's only a green card marriage to keep a Chinese dissident from being deported.
- Marge: We can have the reception at Wong Lee's.
- Ned: I don't think this is what Martin Presbyluther had in mind when he founded our religion by sticking his Three Suggestions under the Pope's windshield wiper.
- Bart: Mr. Flanders, this new reverend has thrown tar in your half-pipe, too?
- Ned: I don't understand that on any level, but yes.
- Bart: Well, let's get Lovejoy back. Do you know where he is?
- Ned: He's in a place full of brimstone and exposed flesh.
- Bart: You mean he's selling hot tubs?
- Ned: Yes.
- Lisa: Mom, I found your wedding dress.
- Marge: How?
- Lisa: Using something this town has never, ever seen good, honest police work. I staked out the alley and befriended the garbage man who took it. Then he gave it to a local theater company, who used it in the first unsuccessful version of Mamma Mia. In a bankruptcy sale, it was bought by a young couple.
