Treehouse of Horror XX/Quotes
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< Treehouse of Horror XX
Revision as of 10:50, October 13, 2023 by SolarBot (talk | contribs) (→Opening: replaced: Count Dracula → {{ap|Count Dracula|monster}})
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Opening
- Count Dracula: Ah, Halloween. The one night when we can walk the streets undetected.
- Boys: Hey, lame-os. Turner Classic Movies called. They want their costumes back.
- Frankenstein: We lame-os?
- Dracula: I have a remedy for our predicament. Into this costumery.
Don't Have a Cow, Mankind
- Kent Brockman: I'm here at Krusty Burger for the launch of the highly anticipated "Burger Squared." Krusty, what can you tell us about this fantastic new sandwich?
- Krusty the Clown: I'm glad you asked, Kent. We start with Grade A beef, feed that to other cows, then kill them and serve the unholy results on a seven-grain bun. Burger Squared!
- Homer: The math checks out!
- Lisa: Cows eating cows?! That's an abomination!
- Marge: Now, Lisa, you're a vegetarian, but these cows have made a different choice.
- Kent Brockman: And now, this lucky reporter will be the first human to sample this delicious crime-against-nature. Mmm. Juicy, flavorful, with just a hint of... [changes into a Muncher and takes a bite out of Krusty's elbow]
- Krusty: Hey! That's my check-cashing arm, you stupid... [Krusty also becomes a Muncher. Kent kills Squeaky-voiced teen and then kills the camera man]
- Moe Szyslak: A little tip... you might want to wash me before you eat me.
- Barney Gumble: All right!
- Carl Carlson: Yeah, you better!
- Lenny Leonard: Thank you.
- Rainier Wolfcastle: Come with me if you want to live.
- [Zombies burst in and attack Wolfcastle]
- Homer: Another politician who can't keep his promises.
- Soldier: Welcome, son. To survive, all we must do is eat your flesh.
- Marge: Hold it right there, bub. What kind of civilized people eat the body and blood of their savior? There must be another way.
- Lisa: Apu, how do you survive?
- Apu: Well, as a vegetarian, I did not consume any tainted burgers. As a convenience store owner, I am armed to the teeth. [He shows the weapons on the roof inside the SUV]
- Lisa: Time has passed. Children play in the streets. At night, there is music and laughter. And all we had to do was let Bart take a bath in our food.
