Difference between revisions of "Lisa the Skeptic/Quotes"
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{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|The Two Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilons|Realty Bites}} | {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|The Two Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilons|Realty Bites}} | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Eddie]]}} So, the hook is baited, huh? | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Lou]]}} Heh. Nice metaphor, Eddie. | |
| + | {{qf|[[Chief Wiggum]]}} Yeah, good work, Eddie. | ||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Bart]]}} Dad? Why aren't you saying anything? Where's our motorboat? | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Homer]]}} I didn't like it. The mast had termites. | |
| + | {{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Why would a motorboat have a mast? | ||
| + | {{qf|Homer}} Because! The thing, it was... shut up. | ||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Marge]]}} Whoo! There's that new mega-mall they're building. They say the air conditioner will be more powerful than a million hydrogen bombs. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Lisa}} Principal Skinner, remember how I didn't sue when I found that scorpion in my applesauce? Well, I'm calling in a favor. | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Principal Skinner]]}} Hmm. I knew this day would come. | |
| − | |||
| − | |||
| − | |||
| − | |||
| − | |||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Ralph Wiggum]]}} Princeskipper Skipple! Prinnipple Skimsker! I found something! It's a spearhead! | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Miss Hoover]]}} That's your trowel blade, Ralph. It fell off the handle. | |
| + | {{qf|Ralph}} And I found it! | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Lisa}} It could be anything. It could be a mutant from the nuclear plant. | ||
| + | {{qf|[[Mr. Burns]]}} Oh, fiddle-faddle. Everyone knows our mutants have flippers. Oops. I've said too much. Smithers, use the amnesia ray. | ||
| + | {{qf|[[Waylon Smithers]]}} You mean the revolver, sir? | ||
| + | {{qf|Mr. Burns}} Precisely. And be sure to wipe your own memory clear when you're finished. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Lisa}} Dad, it's not fair to claim this thing is an angel. There's no proof of that. | ||
| + | {{qf|Homer}} No one's calling it an angel, Lisa. If you'll look carefully, you'll notice I never once used the word "angel". | ||
| + | {{qf|Lisa}} What about that sign right there? | ||
| + | {{qf|Homer}} That's a typo. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Lisa}} Oh, thank you so much! Uhm... you know I can't afford to pay you. | ||
| + | {{qf|{{Ch|Stephen Jay Gould}}}} I didn't become a scientist for financial gain. Whatever little money you have will be just fine. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|[[Carl Carlson]]}} I say it's the Angel of Peace, ya idiot! | ||
| + | {{qf|[[Lenny Leonard]]}} And I say it's the Angel of Mercy, you jerk! | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|[[Kent Brockman]]}} Miss Simpson, how can you maintain your skepticism in spite of the fact that this thing really, really looks like an angel? | ||
| + | {{qf|Lisa}} I just think it's a fantasy. If you believe in angels, then why not unicorns, or sea monsters, or leprechauns? | ||
| + | {{qf|Kent Brockman}} Oh, that's a bunch of baloney, Lisa. Everyone knows leprechauns are extinct. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Homer}} Oh, no! This can't be happening! What the hell are we gonna do with ten thousand angel ashtrays? | ||
| + | {{qf|Bart}} I could take up smoking. | ||
| + | {{qf|Homer}} You damn well better! | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Ralph}} I'm scared, Daddy. Too scared to even wet my pants. | ||
| + | {{qf|Chief Wiggum}} It's okay, son. Just relax and it'll come. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Lisa}} Wait a second! You planted a phony skeleton for me to find! This was all a big hoax. | ||
| + | {{qf|{{ap|Sid|Lisa the Skeptic}}}} Not a hoax. A publicity stunt! | ||
| + | {{qf|Lisa}} You exploited people's deepest beliefs just to hawk your cheesy wares?! Well, we are outraged! Aren't we?! | ||
| + | {{qf|Chief Wiggum}} Oh, oh yeah, yeah, we're outraged. Very, uh... Very much so... But look at all the stores! A Pottery Barn! | ||
{{Season 9|Q}} | {{Season 9|Q}} | ||
Latest revision as of 17:52, April 26, 2024
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- Eddie: So, the hook is baited, huh?
- Lou: Heh. Nice metaphor, Eddie.
- Chief Wiggum: Yeah, good work, Eddie.
- Bart: Dad? Why aren't you saying anything? Where's our motorboat?
- Homer: I didn't like it. The mast had termites.
- Lisa: Why would a motorboat have a mast?
- Homer: Because! The thing, it was... shut up.
- Marge: Whoo! There's that new mega-mall they're building. They say the air conditioner will be more powerful than a million hydrogen bombs.
- Lisa: Principal Skinner, remember how I didn't sue when I found that scorpion in my applesauce? Well, I'm calling in a favor.
- Principal Skinner: Hmm. I knew this day would come.
- Ralph Wiggum: Princeskipper Skipple! Prinnipple Skimsker! I found something! It's a spearhead!
- Miss Hoover: That's your trowel blade, Ralph. It fell off the handle.
- Ralph: And I found it!
- Lisa: It could be anything. It could be a mutant from the nuclear plant.
- Mr. Burns: Oh, fiddle-faddle. Everyone knows our mutants have flippers. Oops. I've said too much. Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
- Waylon Smithers: You mean the revolver, sir?
- Mr. Burns: Precisely. And be sure to wipe your own memory clear when you're finished.
- Lisa: Dad, it's not fair to claim this thing is an angel. There's no proof of that.
- Homer: No one's calling it an angel, Lisa. If you'll look carefully, you'll notice I never once used the word "angel".
- Lisa: What about that sign right there?
- Homer: That's a typo.
- Lisa: Oh, thank you so much! Uhm... you know I can't afford to pay you.
- Stephen Jay Gould: I didn't become a scientist for financial gain. Whatever little money you have will be just fine.
- Carl Carlson: I say it's the Angel of Peace, ya idiot!
- Lenny Leonard: And I say it's the Angel of Mercy, you jerk!
- Kent Brockman: Miss Simpson, how can you maintain your skepticism in spite of the fact that this thing really, really looks like an angel?
- Lisa: I just think it's a fantasy. If you believe in angels, then why not unicorns, or sea monsters, or leprechauns?
- Kent Brockman: Oh, that's a bunch of baloney, Lisa. Everyone knows leprechauns are extinct.
- Homer: Oh, no! This can't be happening! What the hell are we gonna do with ten thousand angel ashtrays?
- Bart: I could take up smoking.
- Homer: You damn well better!
- Ralph: I'm scared, Daddy. Too scared to even wet my pants.
- Chief Wiggum: It's okay, son. Just relax and it'll come.
- Lisa: Wait a second! You planted a phony skeleton for me to find! This was all a big hoax.
- Sid: Not a hoax. A publicity stunt!
- Lisa: You exploited people's deepest beliefs just to hawk your cheesy wares?! Well, we are outraged! Aren't we?!
- Chief Wiggum: Oh, oh yeah, yeah, we're outraged. Very, uh... Very much so... But look at all the stores! A Pottery Barn!
