Night of the Living Wage/Quotes
Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
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764
"Night of the Living Wage"
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- Veterinarian: Well, it was peck-and-go for a minute there, but Gwyneth Poultry is gonna be all right. Here's your astronomical bill.
- Homer: $16,000?! For a chicken? I just ate a whole bucket of them for 20 bucks.
- Homer: Prosthetic beak? Cluck-lear implant? Bawk therapy? We don't have the money for this.
- Marge: In order to save this family, I'm gonna have to do something I've never done before, get a job.
- Bart: Oh, you've had tons of jobs: cop, realtor, gym owner, erotic baker, weed sommelier.
- Marge: Those were for my own growth. This time, it's not personal.
- Marge: They're only hiring for evening shifts.
- Homer: Evenings? That's when you and the food make dinner happen. I don't know how to make pork chops. Where do you kill the pigs? In the sink?
- Marge: Mr. Largo? But you already have a job.
- Dewey Largo: I teach music in a public school, Marge. Do the math. I sure didn't.
- Finn Bon Idée: Together, me and you, and your shift manager...
- Computerized voice: Jill Junderson.
- Finn Bon Idée: ...are gonna revolutionize food delivery and feed all our friends here in...
- Computerized voice: Spring-feld.
- Marge: Cheeses. I need cheeses.
- Old Jewish man: Cheesus, Allah, Buddha, Hashem. We need 'em all, Chef.
- Mr. Largo: Hot stuff coming through, Chef.
- Julio Franco: For the last time, you're not my type, Chef.
- Mrs. Muntz: Please don't press charges. My parole officer's trying to three-strike me instead of breaking up with me like a man.
- Lisa: Guys, we've been ordering delivery for two months. I'm getting an ulcer from all the lying. Or all the chile rellenos.
- Marge: Gil, did you have a chance to ask payroll about our overtime?
- Gil Gunderson: You know, Marge, I did. Funny story. Turns out, since you work past midnight, those hours count as a new day, so you won't be getting overtime.
- Marge: That story's not funny at all.
- Fiscal Cliff: GimmeChow? More like "holy cow" 'cause their stock just went through the roof. Ever since the pivot to ghost kitchens, this app is on fire.
- Lisa: Mom, is everything okay?
- Marge: I'm fine, honey. Just watching the man who's been cheating me out of my overtime pay.It kind of shakes my faith in billionaires.
- Kirk Van Houten: Union? I don't know, Marge. The podcaster who tells me how to be a free-thinker says unions are for communists.
- Marge: Worst of all, my family lied to me.
- Gil: [over ankle monitor] No, worst of all is you're fired with cause! [laughs maniacally]
- Bart: And Mom's eating all the empanadas with the wrong sauces. Not the verde, use the roja. Roja!
- Carl Carlson: You could've fried every electronic device in Springfield.
- Homer: Mmm, fried electronic device. Aw, that one didn't even make sense. I'm losing it.
- Fiscal Cliff: I'm gonna be as impartial as possible here. Why are you starving America with your psychotic demands?
- Finn Bon Idée: Great work, Homer. Really, I could not have busted up this union without you. And stabbing your wife in the back? [chuckles] Nice.
- Homer: Gee, when you say it like that, it sounds like I stabbed my wife in the back.
- Marge: Homer, only you could make a mess this big.
- Homer: I did it for you, honey. All the food in the world means nothing to me if you're not there to keep me from choking on it.
