The Color Yellow/Quotes
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< The Color Yellow
Revision as of 18:06, March 14, 2025 by Solar Dragon (talk | contribs)
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- Groundskeeper Willie: Ach. That stump is really eatin' into my tractor budget. I'll have to use me explosives.
- Bart: Explosives? Great! [pulls out a blueprint] If we put charges on the load-bearing walls, we can blow up detention hall while leaving the art room unharmed. Hey, I like art, okay?
- Willie: I'm blowin' up the stump, not the school.
- Ralph Wiggum: Miss Hoover, what's our lesson today? Is it school?
- Homer: Yeah, the Simpson family is a long line of horse thieves, deadbeats, horse beats, dead thieves, and even a few... [whispering] Alcoholics.
- Lisa: There must have been some good ancestors -- Grampa, don't you know any?
- Grampa: Not a one! Maybe the nicest was Abigail Simpson, who you know as the Pittsburgh Poisoner...
- Homer: I warn you: I don't know what's in there but if it's about a Simpson, you ain't gonna be proud.
- Grampa: Our ancestors were kicked out of Australia!
- Lisa: I can't believe we're descended from slave owners!
- Homer: Me neither. For once, the Simpsons were in management!
- Lisa: She wasn't a slave owner! Our family was on the Underground Railroad!
- Bart: We ran a subway station?
- Lisa: No, the "Underground Railroad" was a bunch of people who helped slaves escape to Canada. There were no actual trains, and it wasn't under ground.
- Bart: Then they should've called it the "Above-Ground Normal-Road."
- Homer: Good point, Bart.
- Marge: Absolutely right.
- Lisa: I never thought of that before.
- Marge: Very good, Bart.
- Marge: Bart, what are you doing for Black History Month?
- Homer: I got an idea: you can march to Selma -- and tell her she's ugly!
- Colonel Burns: I don't like this new Viennese dance craze -- "the waltz." One, two, three / one, two, three... Where's the "four?" All music needs a four!
- Smithers' ancestor: I'll have the orchestra adjust its time signature, Sir.
- Colonel Burns: See that you do.
- Virgil Simpson: You look like you could use a little help.
- Eliza Simpson: Actually, I'm here to help you. Follow me North to freedom!
- Virgil: I don't think so.
- Eliza: [defensive] Why? Because I'm young and I'm a woman?
- Virgil: No. Because you're pointing South.
- Eliza: [sheepish laugh] Oh right, right, sorry. It's my first time.
- Homer: The library? Bart, can you believe we're married to those nerds?
- Lisa: Wait. All that was in the recipe?
- Marge: It was a footnote. See?
- Ralph: Martin Luther King had a dream. Dreams are where Elmo and Toy Story had a party and I went there! Yay! My turn is over!
- Principal Skinner: One of your best, Ralph.
- Homer: Listen, Wrinkles! If you know something that'll cheer up my little girl, you'd better spill it. Or I can make things very uncomfortable for you.
- Grampa: Okay, I'll talk! D-Day is June 6th! Repeat: June 6th! Allied forces will land on the beaches of Normandy in the following order: Utah, Omaha, Gold, Juno... are you writing this down, Fritz?
- Virgil: You defied your husband for me? Man, this is the sixties.
- Abraham Lincoln: Perhaps this hat will help disguise your hair.
- Mabel Simpson: Thank you. How's it look?
- Abraham Lincoln: It makes you look like a potbellied stove.
- Mabel: [annoyed noise]
- Abraham Lincoln: Hey, hey, "Honest Abe." [chuckles] Oh, I'm a riot.
- Lisa: Grampa, why'd you try to keep us from finding this out?
- Grampa: Well, it's hard to explain this to a young person, but people of my generation are... you know...
- Lisa: Racists?
- Grampa: That's it.
