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Difference between revisions of "El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Jomer/Quotes"

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< El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Jomer
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{{TabQ}}
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|episode=El_Viaje_Misterioso_de_Nuestro_Jomer_(The_Mysterious_Voyage_of_Homer)
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{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Hurricane Neddy|The Springfield Files}}
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}}
 
  
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:''[In the Simpson house, Marge has been acting strangely all morning: Cutting things out of the newspaper, running the vacuum cleaner during Homer's phone conversation with Lenny (which keeps him from hearing about something big and annual), and now smoking a cigarette. Homer is suspicious when she doesn't want him to open the front door to let fresh air into the house.]''
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:''[In the Simpson house, [[Marge]] has been acting strangely all morning: Cutting things out of the newspaper, running the vacuum cleaner during [[Homer]]'s phone conversation with [[Lenny]] (which keeps him from hearing about something big and annual), and now smoking a cigarette. Homer is suspicious when she doesn't want him to open the front door to let fresh air into the house.]''
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{{qf|[[Homer]]}} What's wrong with you? What are you trying to hide from me? ''[opens the front door and sniffs]'' What's that smell? Onions... chili powder... cumin... juicy ground chuck? Oh, my God, I'm missing the Chili Cook-Off! ''[whining and fidgeting]'' I'm missing the Cook-Off, it's going on right now, and I'm missing it!
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:'''Homer''': "What's wrong with you? What are you trying to hide from me? ''[opens the front door and sniffs]'' What's that smell? Onions ... chili powder ... cumin ... juicy ground chuck? Oh, my God, I'm missing the Chili Cook-Off! ''[whining and fidgeting]'' I'm missing the Cook-Off, it's going on right now, and I'm missing it!"
+
{{qf|[[Marge]]}} All right! I '''was''' trying to keep it from you! But I had a good reason. Every time you go to that Cook-Off you get as drunk as a poet on payday!
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:'''Marge''': "All right! I '''was''' trying to keep it from you! But I had a good reason. Every time you go to that Cook-Off you get as drunk as a poet on payday!"
 
 
:''[Flashback to last year's Chili Cook-Off. People are shocked as a naked Homer is cavorting in the cotton candy machine.]''
 
:''[Flashback to last year's Chili Cook-Off. People are shocked as a naked Homer is cavorting in the cotton candy machine.]''
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:'''Homer''': ''[drunk, slurred speech]'' "Look at me! I'm a puffy pink cloud!"
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{{qf|Homer}} ''[drunk, slurred speech]'' Look at me! I'm a puffy pink cloud!
 
:''[Return to present.]''
 
:''[Return to present.]''
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:'''[[Homer]]''': "Well, of course everything looks bad when you '''remember''' it!"
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{{qf|Homer}} Well, of course everything looks bad when you '''remember''' it!
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----
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<hr width="50%" />
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:''[Homer interrupts Marge while she's looking at Lenny's crafts booth.]''
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:''[Homer interrupts [[Marge]] while she's looking at [[Lenny]]'s crafts booth.]''
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{{qf|Homer}} Maaaaaarrge! We're missing the chili! Less artsy, more fartsy!
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:'''Homer''': "Maaaaaarrge! We're missing the chili! Less artsy, more fartsy!"
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{{qf|Marge}} Homer, I happen to like handicrafts much more than stuffing my face.
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:'''Marge''': "Homer, I happen to like handicrafts much more than stuffing my face."
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{{qf|Homer}} Fine, I'll come find you when I'm ready to stop having fun.
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:'''Homer''': "Fine, I'll come find you when I'm ready to stop having fun."
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----
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:''[While Homer goes to the chili, Marge takes in the square dancing. Smithers approaches her.]''
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<hr width="50%" />
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{{qf|[[Smithers]]}} Evenin', little lady. Ya reckon a square could get a dance?
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:'''[[Smithers]]''': "Evenin', little lady. Ya reckon a square could get a dance?"
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{{qf|Marge}} It looks so complicated. Do you know how?
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:'''Marge''': "It looks so complicated. Do you know how?"
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{{qf|Smithers}} Ma'am, I wouldn't honk the honk if I couldn't tonk the tonk.
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:'''Smithers''': "Ma'am, I wouldn't honk the honk if I couldn't tonk the tonk."
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----
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{{qf|[[Chief Wiggum]]}} That Homer Simpson! He thinks he is the Pope of Chilitown!
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<hr width="50%" />
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----
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:'''[[Chief Wiggum]]''': "That Homer Simpson! He thinks he is the Pope of Chilitown!"
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:''[Homer's first taste of Chief Wiggum's chili burns his mouth due to Wiggum's including a bunch of [[Guatemalan Insanity Pepper]]s in his recipe. Homer returns with his mouth protected by candle wax, then casually gulps down several of the peppers while a shocked crowd watches.]''
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{{qf|[[Mayor Quimby]]}} Good Lord, this can't be happening!
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<hr width="50%" />
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{{qf|[[Dr. Hibbert]]}} By all medical logic, steam should be shooting out of his ears.
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:''[His mouth protected by candle wax, Homer eats several [[Guatemalan Insanity Pepper]]s while a shocked crowd watches.]''
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{{qf|[[Krusty]]}} His ears if we're lucky!
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:'''[[Mayor Quimby]]''': "Good Lord, this can't be happening!"
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----
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:'''[[Dr. Hibbert]]''': "By all medical logic, steam should be shooting out of his ears."
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{{qf|Homer}} ''[hallucinating due to the peppers]'' I hope I didn't brain my damage.
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:'''[[Krusty]]''': "His ears if we're lucky!"
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----
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{{qf|[[Spirit Guide|Coyote]]}} There is a lesson you must learn.
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<hr width="50%" />
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{{qf|Homer}} If it's about laying off the insanity peppers, I'm way ahead of you.
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:'''Homer''': ''[hallucinating]'' "I hope I didn't brain my damage."
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----
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:''[The next morning, Homer wakes up on a golf course and attempts to rationalize his chili hallucination.]''
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<hr width="50%" />
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{{qf|Homer}} Huh? Golf course? Did I dream that whole thing? Maybe the desert was just this sand trap. Oh, and I bet that crazy pyramid was just the pro shop. ''[the pro shop is shaped like a giant pyramid]'' And that talking coyote was really just a talking dog.
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:'''[[Spirit Guide|Coyote]]''': "There is a lesson you must learn."
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{{qf|Dog}} Hi, Homer. Find your soulmate!
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:'''Homer''': "If it's about laying off the [[Guatemalan Insanity Pepper|insanity peppers]], I'm way ahead of you."
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{{qf|Homer}} Hey, wait a minute! There's no such thing as a talking dog.
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{{qf|Dog}} ''[barks]''
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<hr width="50%" />
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{{qf|Homer}} Damn straight!
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:''[The next morning, [[Homer]] wakes up on a golf course and attempts to rationalize his chili hallucianation.]''
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----
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:'''Homer''': "Huh? Golf course? Did I dream that whole thing? Maybe the desert was just this sand trap. Oh, and I bet that crazy pyramid was just the pro shop. ''[The pro shop is shaped like a giant pyramid.]'' And that talking coyote was really just a talking dog."
 
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:'''Dog''': "Hi, Homer. Find your soulmate!"
 
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:'''Homer''': "Hey, wait a minute! There's no such thing as a talking dog."
 
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:'''Dog''': ''[barks]''
 
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:'''Homer''': "Damn straight!"
 
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<hr width="50%" />
 
 
:''[In search for his soul mate, Homer calls a Personals ad.]''
 
:''[In search for his soul mate, Homer calls a Personals ad.]''
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:'''Homer''': "Hello? Is this ..uh... G B M? Uh, yeah. I read in the personals you were seeking a soulmate. Well, I also like rainy days and movies. Uh-huh ... ''[apprehensively]'' uh, no, I don't like that ... or that ... No, it's not that I'm afraid. ''[now speaking very quickly]'' I'm gonna hang up now, bye-bye!"
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{{qf|Homer}} Hello? Is this ..uh... G B M? Uh, yeah. I read in the personals you were seeking a soulmate. Well, I also like rainy days and movies. Uh-huh... ''[apprehensively]'' uh, no, I don't like that... or that... No, it's not that I'm afraid. ''[now speaking very quickly]'' I'm gonna hang up now, bye-bye!
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----
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<hr width="50%" />
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:''[In the lighthouse, Marge catches up to Homer and they patch up their differences.]''
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:''[Homer is in the lighthouse, and his silhouette is being projected into the sky by the lighthouse's lamp.]''
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{{qf|Homer}} Wow, Marge, you really do understand me. See, I thought we weren't soulmates because...
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:'''[[Bart]]''': ''[looking out a window and seeing the silhouette]'' "Hey, look! Is that Dad?"
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{{qf|Marge}} ''[completing Homer's sentence]'' We had a fight?
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:'''[[Lisa]]''': "Either that, or Batman's really let himself go!"
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{{qf|Homer}} Right, and we don't like the same things. It's like you're from Venus...
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{{qf|Marge}} And you're from Mars.
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<hr width="50%" />
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{{qf|Homer}} Oh, sure, give me the one with all the monsters.
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:''[In the lighthouse, [[Marge]] catches up to [[Homer]] and they patch up their differences.]''
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----
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:'''Homer''': "Wow, Marge, you really do understand me. See, I thought we weren't soulmates because ..."
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{{qf|Homer}} Hey Barney, soulmate! Let me buy you a beer.
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:'''Marge''': ''[completing Homer's sentence]'' "We had a fight?"
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{{qf|[[Barney]]}} Okay, but I'm not your soulmate. I'm really more of a chum.
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:'''Homer''': "Right, and we don't like the same things. It's like you're from Venus ..."
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{{qf|Homer}} What about you, Lenny?
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:'''Marge''': "And you're from Mars."
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{{qf|[[Lenny]]}} I'm a crony.
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:'''Homer''': "Oh, sure, give me the one with all the monsters."
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{{qf|Homer}} Carl?
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{{qf|[[Carl]]}} I'd say acquaintance.
 +
{{qf|[[Larry]]}} Colleague.
 +
{{qf|[[Sam]]}} Sympathizer.
 +
{{qf|[[Bumblebee Man]]}} Compadre.
 +
{{qf|[[Kearney]]}} Associate.
 +
{{qf|Dr. Hibbert}} Contemporary.
 +
{{qf|[[Moe]]}} I'm a well-wisher, in that I don't wish you any specific harm.
 +
----
 +
:''[Homer is in the [[E.A.R.L.|lighthouse]], and his silhouette is being projected into the sky by the lighthouse's lamp.]''
 +
{{qf|[[Bart]]}} ''[looking out a window and seeing the silhouette]'' Hey, look! Is that Dad?
 +
{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Either that, or Batman's really let himself go!
  
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{{Season 8 Q}}
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{{Season 8|Q}}
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[[Category:Quotes]]
 

Latest revision as of 07:02, December 29, 2018


Season 8 Episode Quotes
← 161 "Hurricane Neddy"
162
"El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Jomer"
"The Springfield Files" 163 →


[In the Simpson house, Marge has been acting strangely all morning: Cutting things out of the newspaper, running the vacuum cleaner during Homer's phone conversation with Lenny (which keeps him from hearing about something big and annual), and now smoking a cigarette. Homer is suspicious when she doesn't want him to open the front door to let fresh air into the house.]
Homer: What's wrong with you? What are you trying to hide from me? [opens the front door and sniffs] What's that smell? Onions... chili powder... cumin... juicy ground chuck? Oh, my God, I'm missing the Chili Cook-Off! [whining and fidgeting] I'm missing the Cook-Off, it's going on right now, and I'm missing it!
Marge: All right! I was trying to keep it from you! But I had a good reason. Every time you go to that Cook-Off you get as drunk as a poet on payday!
[Flashback to last year's Chili Cook-Off. People are shocked as a naked Homer is cavorting in the cotton candy machine.]
Homer: [drunk, slurred speech] Look at me! I'm a puffy pink cloud!
[Return to present.]
Homer: Well, of course everything looks bad when you remember it!
[Homer interrupts Marge while she's looking at Lenny's crafts booth.]
Homer: Maaaaaarrge! We're missing the chili! Less artsy, more fartsy!
Marge: Homer, I happen to like handicrafts much more than stuffing my face.
Homer: Fine, I'll come find you when I'm ready to stop having fun.
[While Homer goes to the chili, Marge takes in the square dancing. Smithers approaches her.]
Smithers: Evenin', little lady. Ya reckon a square could get a dance?
Marge: It looks so complicated. Do you know how?
Smithers: Ma'am, I wouldn't honk the honk if I couldn't tonk the tonk.
Chief Wiggum: That Homer Simpson! He thinks he is the Pope of Chilitown!
[Homer's first taste of Chief Wiggum's chili burns his mouth due to Wiggum's including a bunch of Guatemalan Insanity Peppers in his recipe. Homer returns with his mouth protected by candle wax, then casually gulps down several of the peppers while a shocked crowd watches.]
Mayor Quimby: Good Lord, this can't be happening!
Dr. Hibbert: By all medical logic, steam should be shooting out of his ears.
Krusty: His ears if we're lucky!
Homer: [hallucinating due to the peppers] I hope I didn't brain my damage.
Coyote: There is a lesson you must learn.
Homer: If it's about laying off the insanity peppers, I'm way ahead of you.
[The next morning, Homer wakes up on a golf course and attempts to rationalize his chili hallucination.]
Homer: Huh? Golf course? Did I dream that whole thing? Maybe the desert was just this sand trap. Oh, and I bet that crazy pyramid was just the pro shop. [the pro shop is shaped like a giant pyramid] And that talking coyote was really just a talking dog.
Dog: Hi, Homer. Find your soulmate!
Homer: Hey, wait a minute! There's no such thing as a talking dog.
Dog: [barks]
Homer: Damn straight!
[In search for his soul mate, Homer calls a Personals ad.]
Homer: Hello? Is this ..uh... G B M? Uh, yeah. I read in the personals you were seeking a soulmate. Well, I also like rainy days and movies. Uh-huh... [apprehensively] uh, no, I don't like that... or that... No, it's not that I'm afraid. [now speaking very quickly] I'm gonna hang up now, bye-bye!
[In the lighthouse, Marge catches up to Homer and they patch up their differences.]
Homer: Wow, Marge, you really do understand me. See, I thought we weren't soulmates because...
Marge: [completing Homer's sentence] We had a fight?
Homer: Right, and we don't like the same things. It's like you're from Venus...
Marge: And you're from Mars.
Homer: Oh, sure, give me the one with all the monsters.
Homer: Hey Barney, soulmate! Let me buy you a beer.
Barney: Okay, but I'm not your soulmate. I'm really more of a chum.
Homer: What about you, Lenny?
Lenny: I'm a crony.
Homer: Carl?
Carl: I'd say acquaintance.
Larry: Colleague.
Sam: Sympathizer.
Bumblebee Man: Compadre.
Kearney: Associate.
Dr. Hibbert: Contemporary.
Moe: I'm a well-wisher, in that I don't wish you any specific harm.
[Homer is in the lighthouse, and his silhouette is being projected into the sky by the lighthouse's lamp.]
Bart: [looking out a window and seeing the silhouette] Hey, look! Is that Dad?
Lisa: Either that, or Batman's really let himself go!
Season 8 Quotes
Treehouse of Horror VII • You Only Move Twice • The Homer They Fall • Burns, Baby Burns • Bart After Dark • A Milhouse Divided • Lisa's Date with Density • Hurricane Neddy • El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Jomer • The Springfield Files • The Twisted World of Marge Simpson • Mountain of Madness • Simpsoncalifragilisticexpiala(Annoyed Grunt)cious • The Itchy & Scratchy & Poochie Show • Homer's Phobia • Brother from Another Series • My Sister, My Sitter • Homer vs. the Eighteenth Amendment • Grade School Confidential • The Canine Mutiny • The Old Man and the Lisa • In Marge We Trust • Homer's Enemy • The Simpsons Spin-Off Showcase • The Secret War of Lisa Simpson
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