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The Scorpion's Tale/Quotes

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Season 22 Episode Quotes
478 "Angry Dad: The Movie"
"The Scorpion's Tale"
"A Midsummer's Nice Dreams" 480

Bart: Oh my God! The legends are true
Milhouse Van Houten: Did you find gold?
Bart: Better -- the prospectors left naughty French postcards!

Principal Skinner: Lisa, we have to go. Milhouse found a hippie skeleton and he's freaking out.
Milhouse: Never get off the bus! Never get off the bus!

Grampa: I got a right to be cranky! The food stinks and the TV's only got one channel!
Retirement Castle orderly: That's a fish tank.
Grampa: You're a fish tank!
Retirement Castle orderly: [distraught] That is so hurtful. Wish I was a fish tank. Then I could filter out his nasty words. Call me a fish tank...

Lisa: That doesn't seem fair -- they won't let him escape, then they kick him out.

Grampa: Nose in a funny book, how rude! Ain't ya never heard of conversation?
Bart: [sighs] Fine. How's it goin'?
Grampa: Terrible -- I got this new roommate and he won't stop yappin'!

Walter Hotenhoffer: My name is Walter Hotenhoffer and I'm in the pharmaceutical business.
Carl Carlson: I was wonderin' when that guy was gonna state his name and occupation.

Grampa: Not so fast, Fritz! Before you waltz off with my Grampa grease, I wanna know, what did you do during the war?
Walter Hotenhoffer: World War Two? I wasn't born yet.
Grampa: Funny how many Germans say that these days.

Homer: Thank you for the tour of your factory, Mister Wonka.
Walter Hotenhoffer: I am not Willy Wonka!
Bart: No, no. You're Augustus Gloop, the fat German boy!
Walter Hotenhoffer: Yah, it is true, I am Gloop. Being stuck in that tube changed me in so many ways.

Marge: At some point I think we should see a doctor.
Bart: No, it's cool -- it's like we've got our own monster!
Homer: Your grandfather is not a monster. Now, let's chain him in the basement until the circus gets to town.
Grampa: Sounds good!

Lisa: So I guess the lesson here is...
Principal Skinner: If you go on a field trip, don't break off from the group.
Walter Hotenhoffer: And if you are a fat little boy in a chocolate factory, never try to drink from the river. The tube! My God! Every night I see the tube!
Season 22 Quotes
Elementary School Musical Loan-a Lisa MoneyBart Treehouse of Horror XXI Lisa Simpson, This Isn't Your Life The Fool Monty How Munched Is That Birdie in the Window? The Fight Before Christmas Donnie Fatso Moms I'd Like to Forget Flaming Moe Homer the Father The Blue and the Gray Angry Dad: The Movie The Scorpion's Tale A Midsummer's Nice Dreams Love Is a Many-Strangled Thing The Great Simpsina The Real Housewives of Fat Tony Homer Scissorhands 500 Keys The Ned-liest Catch