Difference between revisions of "New Kid on the Block/Quotes"
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{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Marge Gets a Job|Mr. Plow}} | {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Marge Gets a Job|Mr. Plow}} | ||
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'''[[Lionel Hutz]]''': "Mr. Simpson, this is the most blatant case of fraudulent advertising since my case against ''The Never-Ending Story''!" | '''[[Lionel Hutz]]''': "Mr. Simpson, this is the most blatant case of fraudulent advertising since my case against ''The Never-Ending Story''!" | ||
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'''Homer''': Mmm... shrimp... | '''Homer''': Mmm... shrimp... | ||
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| − | '''Laura Powers''' [to Bart] | + | '''[[Laura Powers]]:''' ''[to Bart]'' Are you all right? |
'''Bart's Brain''': She's beautiful. Say something clever. | '''Bart's Brain''': She's beautiful. Say something clever. | ||
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'''Homer''': Shut up, you little monsters! | '''Homer''': Shut up, you little monsters! | ||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | '''Homer''' [finding a babysitter] | + | '''Homer:''' ''[finding a babysitter]'' I was wondering if you'd like to babysit my little angels. |
| − | '''Woman''': Sorry, this isn't | + | '''Woman''': Sorry, this isn't Abbie; this is her sister. I look after her now. |
| − | ''' | + | '''[[Abbie]]''': ''[rocking, but otherwise motionless in her rocking chair]'' No, Bart. Put it down, Bart. Bart, put it down. |
---- | ---- | ||
'''Waiter''': I'm sorry, ma'am, but everything on the menu has fish in it. | '''Waiter''': I'm sorry, ma'am, but everything on the menu has fish in it. | ||
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'''Marge''': I really think that was the character's name. Don Quixote. | '''Marge''': I really think that was the character's name. Don Quixote. | ||
| − | '''Homer''': Fine! I'll look it up! [heads off and consults a reference] | + | '''Homer''': Fine! I'll look it up! ''[heads off and consults a reference]'' |
'''Marge''': Well, who was it? | '''Marge''': Well, who was it? | ||
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'''Homer''': Never mind. | '''Homer''': Never mind. | ||
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| − | '''Bart''' [about Jimbo Jones] | + | '''Bart:''' ''[about Jimbo Jones]'' How can you like that guy? |
'''Laura''': I dunno. Maybe because he's an outlaw. You know that dead body they found behind the mayor's house? | '''Laura''': I dunno. Maybe because he's an outlaw. You know that dead body they found behind the mayor's house? | ||
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'''Lisa''': Good luck in your trumped-up lawsuit, Dad. | '''Lisa''': Good luck in your trumped-up lawsuit, Dad. | ||
| − | '''Homer''': [hugs her] Thanks. That means a lot to me. | + | '''Homer''': ''[hugs her]'' Thanks. That means a lot to me. |
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| − | '''Bart''' [about Jimbo Jones] | + | '''Bart:''' ''[about Jimbo Jones]'' What do you like about him? He's just a good-looking rebel who plays by his own rules. |
| − | '''Lisa and Laura''': [sigh wistfully] | + | '''Lisa and Laura''': ''[sigh wistfully]'' |
---- | ---- | ||
'''Lionel Hutz''': Mrs. Simpson, in your own words, please tell us what happened after you and your husband were ejected from the restaurant. | '''Lionel Hutz''': Mrs. Simpson, in your own words, please tell us what happened after you and your husband were ejected from the restaurant. | ||
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'''Lionel Hutz''': And when you couldn't find any? | '''Lionel Hutz''': And when you couldn't find any? | ||
| − | '''Marge''': (crying) We went fishing! | + | '''Marge''': ''(crying)'' We went fishing! |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | '''Moe''': Uh, Amanda Huggenkiss? Hey, I'm looking for Amanda Huggenkiss! Ah, why can't I find Amanda Huggenkiss? | + | '''[[Moe]]''': Uh, Amanda Huggenkiss? Hey, I'm looking for Amanda Huggenkiss! Ah, why can't I find Amanda Huggenkiss? |
| − | '''Barney''': Maybe your standards are too high! (barflies laughs) | + | '''[[Barney]]''': Maybe your standards are too high! ''(barflies laughs)'' |
| − | '''Moe''': (to Bart) You little S.O.B.! Why, when I find out who you are, I'm going to shove a sausage down your throat and stick starving dogs in your butt! | + | '''Moe''': ''(to Bart)'' You little S.O.B.! Why, when I find out who you are, I'm going to shove a sausage down your throat and stick starving dogs in your butt! |
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'''Bart''': As usual, a knife-wielding maniac has shown us the way. | '''Bart''': As usual, a knife-wielding maniac has shown us the way. | ||
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'''Barney''': Uh oh, my heart just stopped..... oh, there it goes. | '''Barney''': Uh oh, my heart just stopped..... oh, there it goes. | ||
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| − | '''Laura''': [on the phone] Hello, I'd like to speak to Ms. Tinkle? First name... | + | '''Laura''': ''[on the phone]'' Hello, I'd like to speak to Ms. Tinkle? First name... |
| − | '''Bart''': [whispers] | + | '''Bart''': ''[whispers]'' |
'''Laura''': Ivana? | '''Laura''': Ivana? | ||
| − | '''Moe''': [on the phone] | + | '''Moe''': ''[on the phone]'' Ivana Tinkle, just a sec. ''[calls]'' Ivana Tinkle! Ivana Tinkle! Hey, everybody, put down your glasses. Ivana Tinkle! |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | '''Grampa''': Bart, oh you remembered my birthday? | + | '''[[Grampa]]''': Bart, oh you remembered my birthday? |
'''Bart''': Huh? Oh, I sure did! Here's a bus schedule. | '''Bart''': Huh? Oh, I sure did! Here's a bus schedule. | ||
'''Grampa''': Wow, fits right in my pocket. | '''Grampa''': Wow, fits right in my pocket. | ||
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{{Season 4|Q}} | {{Season 4|Q}} | ||
Revision as of 07:24, November 12, 2018
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Lionel Hutz: "Mr. Simpson, this is the most blatant case of fraudulent advertising since my case against The Never-Ending Story!"
Moe: "Barney, don't steal any beer while I'm gone".
Barney: "What kind of pathetic drunk do you take me for? [looks around the bar] Somebody spilled beer in this ashtray!" [starts drinking beer out of the ashtray]
Homer: "Son, a woman is a lot like a... a refrigerator! They're about six feet tall, 300 pounds. They make ice, and… um… Oh, wait a minute! Actually, a woman is more like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step over your own mother just to get one! But you can't stop at one, you wanna drink another woman".
Lionel Hutz: "Homer, I don't use the word 'hero' very often, but you are the greatest hero in American history".
Bart: "I'll show them who's 'just a kid!'"
Marge: "Bart, bedtime! I laid out your jammy-jams!"
Ruth: "I actually had some doubts about moving to Springfield, especially after that TIME cover story, 'America's Worst City.'"
Marge: "You could see our house in that photo!"
Lawyer: "Your Honor, I'd like to show the court just how much shrimp Mr. Simpson ate. Bring it in, boys!"
Aide: "Eighteen thousand letters, all addressed to Santa Claus".
Lawyer: "You want the People of Springfield versus Kris Kringle. That's next door".
Homer: There was something else...something I was supposed to tiptoe around.
Ruth Powers: My divorce.
Homer: That's it! Woo-hoo! I'm glad one of us remembered. That could've been embarrassing.
Bart: Hey, sometimes a guy just likes his skin to look its yellowest.
Homer: Marge, we're going to that restaurant.
Marge: But I think I'm allergic to seafood. The last time I ate shrimp, my throat closed up, and I went into convulsions.
Homer: Mmm... shrimp...
Laura Powers: [to Bart] Are you all right?
Bart's Brain: She's beautiful. Say something clever.
Bart: I fell on my bottom.
Bart's Brain: D'oh
Bart: I no longer control the hand... The hand controls me!
Homer: Shut up, you little monsters!
Homer: [finding a babysitter] I was wondering if you'd like to babysit my little angels.
Woman: Sorry, this isn't Abbie; this is her sister. I look after her now.
Abbie: [rocking, but otherwise motionless in her rocking chair] No, Bart. Put it down, Bart. Bart, put it down.
Waiter: I'm sorry, ma'am, but everything on the menu has fish in it.
Marge: Mmm, what about the bread? Does that have much fish in it?
Waiter: Yes.
Homer: This is my quest. I'm like that guy. That Spanish guy. You know, he fought the windmill...
Marge: Don Quixote?
Homer: No, that's not it. What's-his-name, the Man of La Mancha.
Marge: Don Quixote.
Homer: No!
Marge: I really think that was the character's name. Don Quixote.
Homer: Fine! I'll look it up! [heads off and consults a reference]
Marge: Well, who was it?
Homer: Never mind.
Bart: [about Jimbo Jones] How can you like that guy?
Laura: I dunno. Maybe because he's an outlaw. You know that dead body they found behind the mayor's house?
Bart: Jimbo killed him?
Laura: No. But he poked him with a stick.
Lisa: Good luck in your trumped-up lawsuit, Dad.
Homer: [hugs her] Thanks. That means a lot to me.
Bart: [about Jimbo Jones] What do you like about him? He's just a good-looking rebel who plays by his own rules.
Lisa and Laura: [sigh wistfully]
Lionel Hutz: Mrs. Simpson, in your own words, please tell us what happened after you and your husband were ejected from the restaurant.
Marge: We pretty much went straight home.
Lionel Hutz: Remember, Mrs. Simpson, you're still under oath.
Marge: We drove around until 3:00 in the morning looking for another open all-you-can-eat seafood restaurant.
Lionel Hutz: And when you couldn't find any?
Marge: (crying) We went fishing!
Moe: Uh, Amanda Huggenkiss? Hey, I'm looking for Amanda Huggenkiss! Ah, why can't I find Amanda Huggenkiss?
Barney: Maybe your standards are too high! (barflies laughs)
Moe: (to Bart) You little S.O.B.! Why, when I find out who you are, I'm going to shove a sausage down your throat and stick starving dogs in your butt!
Bart: As usual, a knife-wielding maniac has shown us the way.
Barney: Uh oh, my heart just stopped..... oh, there it goes.
Laura: [on the phone] Hello, I'd like to speak to Ms. Tinkle? First name...
Bart: [whispers]
Laura: Ivana?
Moe: [on the phone] Ivana Tinkle, just a sec. [calls] Ivana Tinkle! Ivana Tinkle! Hey, everybody, put down your glasses. Ivana Tinkle!
Grampa: Bart, oh you remembered my birthday?
Bart: Huh? Oh, I sure did! Here's a bus schedule.
Grampa: Wow, fits right in my pocket.
