Difference between revisions of "Lisa's First Word/Quotes"
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{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Mr. Plow|Homer's Triple Bypass}} | {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Mr. Plow|Homer's Triple Bypass}} | ||
− | + | {{qf|Baby [[Lisa]]}} "Bart!" | |
− | + | {{qf|Toddler [[Bart]]}} "What did you say?" | |
− | + | {{qf|Baby Lisa}} "Bart?" | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} "Suffering succatash! You can talk! ''[runs downstairs]'' Mom! Dad! She can talk! Say it again, Lis." | |
− | + | {{qf|Baby Lisa}} "Bart! Bart, Bart, Bart, Bart, Bart." | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} "''I'm'' her first word!" | |
− | + | {{qf|[[Marge]]}} "Well, I'm not surprised. Lisa's crazy about you. She thinks you hung the moon." | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} "Wow! ''[to Lisa]'' Lisa. Can you say 'Mommy'?" | |
− | + | {{qf|Baby Lisa}} "Mommy." | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} "Can you say 'David Hasslehoff'?" | |
− | + | {{qf|Baby Lisa}} "Dabid Hasslehoff." ''[giggles]'' | |
− | + | {{qf|[[Homer]]}} "Can you say 'Daddy'?" | |
− | + | {{qf|Baby Lisa}} "Homer." | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} "No, sweetie. 'Daddy'." | |
− | + | {{qf|Baby Lisa}} ''[pause]'' "Homer." | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} "D'oh!" | |
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---- | ---- | ||
:''[While Bart and Lisa argue, Homer puts Maggie to bed.]'' | :''[While Bart and Lisa argue, Homer puts Maggie to bed.]'' | ||
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} "You know, Maggie. The sooner kids learn to talk, the sooner they talk back. ''[puts Maggie in her crib]'' I hope you never say a word." | |
:''[Homer leaves the room, closing the door behind him. Maggie takes her pacifier out of her mouth.]'' | :''[Homer leaves the room, closing the door behind him. Maggie takes her pacifier out of her mouth.]'' | ||
− | + | {{qf|[[Maggie]]}} "Daddy." | |
---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|Marge}} Maggie, can you say ba-ba? Can you say mama? | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} Can you say get bent? | |
− | + | {{qf|Marge}} Bart! | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} Mister Rogers says it all the time! | |
− | + | {{qf|Marge}} He does not. | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Maggie, can you say daddy? Daddy? | |
− | + | {{qf|Marge}} Kitty. Kitty. | |
− | + | {{qf|Lisa}} Be-bop. Be-bop. | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} Shove it. Shove it. | |
− | + | {{qf|Marge}} According to Fretful Mother Magazine, if Maggie doesn't talk at age 1, we should consider a corrective tongue extender. | |
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---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} Homer! | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Heh, heh, heh, heh, heh. Homer's what grownups call me. Call me daddy. | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} Homer. | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Daddy. | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} Homer. | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} ''[becoming increasingly irate]'' Daddy. | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} Da...da...da... | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Yes? | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} D'omer! Hah, hah, hah... | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Why you little... ''[chokes Bart]'' | |
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---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|Marge}} ''[telling Bart a bedtime story]'' Then the prince and the princess... ''[yawn]'' got married and lived happily ever after. | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} Then what happened? | |
− | + | {{qf|Marge}} Uh...they had 30 sons and thirty daughters. | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} What were their names? | |
− | + | {{qf|Marge}} Hmm...Dennis...Brad...Mavis...Brad... ''[falls asleep]'' | |
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---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Got your nose! Heh heh heh. | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} Got your wallet! ''[flushes it down toilet]'' | |
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---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|Marge}} There's going to be twice as much love in this house as there is now! | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} We're going to start doing it in the morning?! | |
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---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|Marge}} I'm afraid we're going to need a bigger house. | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} No, we won't. I've got it all figured out. The baby can have Bart's crib and Bart'll sleep with us until he's 21. | |
− | + | {{qf|Marge}} Won't that warp him? | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} My cousin Frank did it. | |
− | + | {{qf|Marge}} You don't have a cousin Frank. | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} He became Francine back in '76. Then he joined that cult. I think his name is Mother Shabubu now. | |
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− | + | {{qf|[[Selma]]}} Hey Bart, want a dollar? Uh uh uh, you know what I wanna hear. | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} ''[singing]'' I'm a little teapot short and stout, this is my handle this is my spout. The incy wincy spider went up the water spout... | |
− | + | {{qf|Selma}} Oh yeah! Love that spout medley. | |
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− | + | {{qf|Marge}} Once we get the cats out of the way, it won't be too bad. | |
− | + | {{qf|[[Realty agent]]}} Actually, according to the will, the cats own the house. You'd be their tenants! | |
− | + | {{qf|Lisa}} I wish we lived in the kitty house. | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} I could've trained them to be my unholy army of the night. Go, my pretties! Kill! Kill! | |
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---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Dad, I have a problem. | |
− | + | {{qf|[[Grampa]]}} Why did you come to me? I don't know nothin'. I used to get by on my looks. Now they're gone... withered away like an old piece of fruit. ''[sobs]'' | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Are you done? | |
− | + | {{qf|Grampa}} No, not yet! I was voted the handsomest boy in [[Albany]], [[New York]]! | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Dad, I don't need advice! I need $15,000 to buy a home! | |
− | + | {{qf|Grampa}} Oh, well. All I own is this house, that I built with my own two hands! | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} You didn't build this house! You won it on a crooked 50's game show! | |
− | + | {{qf|Grampa}} I ratted on everybody and got off scot-free! | |
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− | + | {{qf|Grampa}} All right, son, I'll sell this dump and write you a check. | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Dad, first you gave me life, now you've given me a home for my family, I'd be honored if you came to live with us. | |
− | + | {{qf|Grampa}} Thank you! | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} ''[in the present]'' So how long before you shipped Grampa off to the old-folks home? | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} About three weeks. | |
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:''[Everyone laughs.]'' | :''[Everyone laughs.]'' | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|Lisa}} When do we get to my first word? | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Your what? | |
− | + | {{qf|Lisa}} My first words! | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Nah, you don't want to hear that story. I know. I'll tell you about the time I got locked in the bank vault with Mr. Mooney. It was another one of my harebrained schemes. | |
− | + | {{qf|Lisa}} Dad! | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Wait a minute. That was "The Lucy Show". Okay, where were we? | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} Mom was preggers and Dad threw all our money down a sink hole. | |
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---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|[[Ned]]}} If you need anything just give a whistle. | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} I could use a TV tray. | |
− | + | {{qf|Ned}} Well, gee... | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} What? | |
− | + | {{qf|Ned}} Uh, I just this minute bought it at the hardware... | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} You said "anything". | |
− | + | {{qf|Ned}} Heh, sure, you can borrow it for...a little while. | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} ''[in the present]'' And that little while is now 8 years and counting. Heh, heh, heh. | |
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---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} ''[during his "terrible two's" phase; he's banging pans and chanting while Marge is resting in her bedroom with a washcloth on her forehead]'' I am so great! I am so great! Everybody loves me, I am so great! | |
− | + | {{qf|Marge}} Honey, honey, honey, honey, honey. Could you please be quiet? | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! Quie -- | |
− | + | {{qf|Marge}} Bart, get out! | |
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---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day. | |
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− | + | {{qf|Bart}} [[Krusty]] funny! | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Duh. | |
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− | + | {{qf|Bart}} Can't sleep, clown'll eat me. | |
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− | + | {{qf|Marge}} Homer, I think the baby is coming. | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Wow. A baby and a free burger. Could this be the best day of my life? | |
− | + | {{qf|TV Announcer}} Next up, an hour-long episode of "Mama's Family." | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Yes! | |
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---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|Ned}} We'll take good care of your boy, Simpson. Enjoy the miracle of creation! | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Shut up, Flanders. | |
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---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|Ned}} Supper time, boys! | |
− | + | {{qf|[[Todd]]}} Oh boy: liver! | |
− | + | {{qf|[[Rod]]}} Iron helps us play. | |
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− | + | {{qf|Marge}} ''[about Bart after Lisa's born]'' According to this magazine, Bart might be jealous of her. | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Well, Bart can kiss my hairy yellow butt. | |
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---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|Marge}} I saved this newspaper from the day Lisa was born. | |
− | + | {{qf|Lisa}} "Mondale to Hart: Where's the beef?" | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} "Where's the beef?" What the hell that's supposed to mean? | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} ''[laughs]'' "Where's the beef"...No wonder he won Minnesota. | |
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---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|Patty}} The older they get, the cuter they ain't. | |
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− | + | {{qf|[[Dr. Hibbert]]}} ''[at Lisa's checkup]'' ''[laughs]'' She has the relexes of a young [[Mary Lou Retton]]. Have a wowwipop. ''[gives Lisa one]'' | |
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} Can I have a lollipop? | |
− | + | {{qf|Dr. Hibbert}} Oh Bart, I'm afraid that was the last one. But I've got something even better for you: a rubella inoculation! ''[holds up a giant needle]'' | |
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---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|Bart}} I wanna hold the baby. I wanna hold the baby. | |
− | + | {{qf|Marge}} I'm sorry, Bart, you're too little. | |
− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Here, Bart, you can hold my beer. ''[puts it on his head]'' | |
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{{Season 4|Q}} | {{Season 4|Q}} |
Revision as of 07:42, November 12, 2018
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- Baby Lisa: "Bart!"
- Toddler Bart: "What did you say?"
- Baby Lisa: "Bart?"
- Bart: "Suffering succatash! You can talk! [runs downstairs] Mom! Dad! She can talk! Say it again, Lis."
- Baby Lisa: "Bart! Bart, Bart, Bart, Bart, Bart."
- Bart: "I'm her first word!"
- Marge: "Well, I'm not surprised. Lisa's crazy about you. She thinks you hung the moon."
- Bart: "Wow! [to Lisa] Lisa. Can you say 'Mommy'?"
- Baby Lisa: "Mommy."
- Bart: "Can you say 'David Hasslehoff'?"
- Baby Lisa: "Dabid Hasslehoff." [giggles]
- Homer: "Can you say 'Daddy'?"
- Baby Lisa: "Homer."
- Homer: "No, sweetie. 'Daddy'."
- Baby Lisa: [pause] "Homer."
- Homer: "D'oh!"
- [While Bart and Lisa argue, Homer puts Maggie to bed.]
- Homer: "You know, Maggie. The sooner kids learn to talk, the sooner they talk back. [puts Maggie in her crib] I hope you never say a word."
- [Homer leaves the room, closing the door behind him. Maggie takes her pacifier out of her mouth.]
- Maggie: "Daddy."
- Marge: Maggie, can you say ba-ba? Can you say mama?
- Bart: Can you say get bent?
- Marge: Bart!
- Bart: Mister Rogers says it all the time!
- Marge: He does not.
- Homer: Maggie, can you say daddy? Daddy?
- Marge: Kitty. Kitty.
- Lisa: Be-bop. Be-bop.
- Bart: Shove it. Shove it.
- Marge: According to Fretful Mother Magazine, if Maggie doesn't talk at age 1, we should consider a corrective tongue extender.
- Bart: Homer!
- Homer: Heh, heh, heh, heh, heh. Homer's what grownups call me. Call me daddy.
- Bart: Homer.
- Homer: Daddy.
- Bart: Homer.
- Homer: [becoming increasingly irate] Daddy.
- Bart: Da...da...da...
- Homer: Yes?
- Bart: D'omer! Hah, hah, hah...
- Homer: Why you little... [chokes Bart]
- Marge: [telling Bart a bedtime story] Then the prince and the princess... [yawn] got married and lived happily ever after.
- Bart: Then what happened?
- Marge: Uh...they had 30 sons and thirty daughters.
- Bart: What were their names?
- Marge: Hmm...Dennis...Brad...Mavis...Brad... [falls asleep]
- Homer: Got your nose! Heh heh heh.
- Bart: Got your wallet! [flushes it down toilet]
- Marge: There's going to be twice as much love in this house as there is now!
- Homer: We're going to start doing it in the morning?!
- Marge: I'm afraid we're going to need a bigger house.
- Homer: No, we won't. I've got it all figured out. The baby can have Bart's crib and Bart'll sleep with us until he's 21.
- Marge: Won't that warp him?
- Homer: My cousin Frank did it.
- Marge: You don't have a cousin Frank.
- Homer: He became Francine back in '76. Then he joined that cult. I think his name is Mother Shabubu now.
- Selma: Hey Bart, want a dollar? Uh uh uh, you know what I wanna hear.
- Bart: [singing] I'm a little teapot short and stout, this is my handle this is my spout. The incy wincy spider went up the water spout...
- Selma: Oh yeah! Love that spout medley.
- Marge: Once we get the cats out of the way, it won't be too bad.
- Realty agent: Actually, according to the will, the cats own the house. You'd be their tenants!
- Lisa: I wish we lived in the kitty house.
- Bart: I could've trained them to be my unholy army of the night. Go, my pretties! Kill! Kill!
- Homer: Dad, I have a problem.
- Grampa: Why did you come to me? I don't know nothin'. I used to get by on my looks. Now they're gone... withered away like an old piece of fruit. [sobs]
- Homer: Are you done?
- Grampa: No, not yet! I was voted the handsomest boy in Albany, New York!
- Homer: Dad, I don't need advice! I need $15,000 to buy a home!
- Grampa: Oh, well. All I own is this house, that I built with my own two hands!
- Homer: You didn't build this house! You won it on a crooked 50's game show!
- Grampa: I ratted on everybody and got off scot-free!
- Grampa: All right, son, I'll sell this dump and write you a check.
- Homer: Dad, first you gave me life, now you've given me a home for my family, I'd be honored if you came to live with us.
- Grampa: Thank you!
- Bart: [in the present] So how long before you shipped Grampa off to the old-folks home?
- Homer: About three weeks.
- [Everyone laughs.]
- Lisa: When do we get to my first word?
- Homer: Your what?
- Lisa: My first words!
- Homer: Nah, you don't want to hear that story. I know. I'll tell you about the time I got locked in the bank vault with Mr. Mooney. It was another one of my harebrained schemes.
- Lisa: Dad!
- Homer: Wait a minute. That was "The Lucy Show". Okay, where were we?
- Bart: Mom was preggers and Dad threw all our money down a sink hole.
- Ned: If you need anything just give a whistle.
- Homer: I could use a TV tray.
- Ned: Well, gee...
- Homer: What?
- Ned: Uh, I just this minute bought it at the hardware...
- Homer: You said "anything".
- Ned: Heh, sure, you can borrow it for...a little while.
- Homer: [in the present] And that little while is now 8 years and counting. Heh, heh, heh.
- Bart: [during his "terrible two's" phase; he's banging pans and chanting while Marge is resting in her bedroom with a washcloth on her forehead] I am so great! I am so great! Everybody loves me, I am so great!
- Marge: Honey, honey, honey, honey, honey. Could you please be quiet?
- Bart: Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! Quie --
- Marge: Bart, get out!
- Homer: It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day.
- Bart: Krusty funny!
- Homer: Duh.
- Bart: Can't sleep, clown'll eat me.
- Marge: Homer, I think the baby is coming.
- Homer: Wow. A baby and a free burger. Could this be the best day of my life?
- TV Announcer: Next up, an hour-long episode of "Mama's Family."
- Homer: Yes!
- Ned: We'll take good care of your boy, Simpson. Enjoy the miracle of creation!
- Homer: Shut up, Flanders.
- Marge: [about Bart after Lisa's born] According to this magazine, Bart might be jealous of her.
- Homer: Well, Bart can kiss my hairy yellow butt.
- Marge: I saved this newspaper from the day Lisa was born.
- Lisa: "Mondale to Hart: Where's the beef?"
- Bart: "Where's the beef?" What the hell that's supposed to mean?
- Homer: [laughs] "Where's the beef"...No wonder he won Minnesota.
- Patty: The older they get, the cuter they ain't.
- Dr. Hibbert: [at Lisa's checkup] [laughs] She has the relexes of a young Mary Lou Retton. Have a wowwipop. [gives Lisa one]
- Bart: Can I have a lollipop?
- Dr. Hibbert: Oh Bart, I'm afraid that was the last one. But I've got something even better for you: a rubella inoculation! [holds up a giant needle]
- Bart: I wanna hold the baby. I wanna hold the baby.
- Marge: I'm sorry, Bart, you're too little.
- Homer: Here, Bart, you can hold my beer. [puts it on his head]