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Difference between revisions of "Lisa's First Word/Quotes"

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{{TabQ|episode=Lisa's First Word}}
+
{{TabQ}}
 
{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Mr. Plow|Homer's Triple Bypass}}
 
{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Mr. Plow|Homer's Triple Bypass}}
  
{{qf|Baby [[Lisa]]}} Bart!
+
{{qf|[[Marge]]}} [[Maggie]], can you say ba-ba? Can you say Ma-ma?
{{qf|Toddler [[Bart]]}} What did you say?
+
{{qf|[[Bart]]}} Can you say "get bent"?
{{qf|Baby Lisa}} Bart?
 
{{qf|Bart}} Suffering succatash! You can talk! ''[runs downstairs]'' Mom! Dad! She can talk! Say it again, Lis.
 
{{qf|Baby Lisa}} Bart! Bart, Bart, Bart, Bart, Bart.
 
{{qf|Bart}} ''I'm'' her first word!
 
{{qf|[[Marge]]}} Well, I'm not surprised. Lisa's crazy about you. She thinks you hung the moon.
 
{{qf|Bart}} Wow! ''[to Lisa]'' Lisa. Can you say 'Mommy'?
 
{{qf|Baby Lisa}} Mommy.
 
{{qf|Bart}} Can you say 'David Hasslehoff'?
 
{{qf|Baby Lisa}} Dabid Hasslehoff. ''[giggles]''
 
{{qf|[[Homer]]}} Can you say 'Daddy'?
 
{{qf|Baby Lisa}} Homer.
 
{{qf|Homer}} No, sweetie. 'Daddy'.
 
{{qf|Baby Lisa}} ''[pause]'' Homer.
 
{{qf|Homer}} D'oh!
 
----
 
:''[While Bart and Lisa argue, Homer puts Maggie to bed.]''
 
 
 
{{qf|Homer}} You know, Maggie. The sooner kids learn to talk, the sooner they talk back. ''[puts Maggie in her crib]'' I hope you never say a word.
 
 
 
:''[Homer leaves the room, closing the door behind him. Maggie takes her pacifier out of her mouth.]''
 
 
 
{{qf|[[Maggie]]}} Daddy.
 
----
 
{{qf|Marge}} Maggie, can you say ba-ba? Can you say mama?
 
{{qf|Bart}} Can you say get bent?
 
 
{{qf|Marge}} Bart!
 
{{qf|Marge}} Bart!
{{qf|Bart}} Mister Rogers says it all the time!
+
{{qf|Bart}} [[Fred Rogers|Mister Rogers]] says it all the time.
 
{{qf|Marge}} He does not.
 
{{qf|Marge}} He does not.
{{qf|Homer}} Maggie, can you say daddy? Daddy?
+
{{qf|[[Homer]]}} Maggie, can you say "daddy"? Dad-dy?
{{qf|Marge}} Kitty. Kitty.
+
{{qf|Marge}} "Kit-ty"? "Kit-ty"?
{{qf|Lisa}} Be-bop. Be-bop.
+
{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} "Be-bop"? "Be-bop"?
{{qf|Bart}} Shove it. Shove it.
+
{{qf|Bart}} "Shove it?" "Shove it?"
{{qf|Marge}} According to Fretful Mother Magazine, if Maggie doesn't talk at age 1, we should consider a corrective tongue extender.
+
{{qf|Maggie}} ''[burps]''
 +
{{qf|Homer}} Did you hear that? She said "burlap."
 
----
 
----
{{qf|Bart}} Homer!
+
{{qf|Marge}} According to ''[[Fretful Mother]]'' magazine, if Maggie doesn't talk by age one, we should consider a corrective tongue extender.
{{qf|Homer}} Heh, heh, heh, heh, heh. Homer's what grownups call me. Call me daddy.
 
{{qf|Bart}} Homer.
 
{{qf|Homer}} Daddy.
 
{{qf|Bart}} Homer.
 
{{qf|Homer}} ''[becoming increasingly irate]'' Daddy.
 
{{qf|Bart}} Da...da...da...
 
{{qf|Homer}} Yes?
 
{{qf|Bart}} D'omer! Hah, hah, hah...
 
{{qf|Homer}} Why you little... ''[chokes Bart]''
 
 
----
 
----
{{qf|Marge}} ''[telling Bart a bedtime story]'' Then the prince and the princess... ''[yawn]'' got married and lived happily ever after.
+
{{qf|Marge}} Well, this story begins in this unforgettable spring of 1983: [[Ms. Pac-Man]] struck a blow for women's rights... a young [[Joe Piscopo]] taught us how to laugh.
{{qf|Bart}} Then what happened?
 
{{qf|Marge}} Uh...they had 30 sons and thirty daughters.
 
{{qf|Bart}} What were their names?
 
{{qf|Marge}} Hmm...Dennis...Brad...Mavis...Brad... ''[falls asleep]''
 
 
----
 
----
{{qf|Homer}} Got your nose! Heh heh heh.
+
{{qf|Marge}} Guess what, Homie... There's going to be twice as much love in this house as there is now.
{{qf|Bart}} Got your wallet! ''[flushes it down toilet]''
+
{{qf|Homer}} We're gonna start doin' it in the morning?
 +
{{qf|Marge}} No.
 
----
 
----
{{qf|Marge}} There's going to be twice as much love in this house as there is now!
+
{{qf|Marge}} I'm afraid we're going to need a bigger place.
{{qf|Homer}} We're going to start doing it in the morning?!
+
{{qf|Homer}} No, we won't. I've got it all figured out. The baby can have Bart's crib and Bart can sleep with us until he's 21!
----
 
{{qf|Marge}} I'm afraid we're going to need a bigger house.
 
{{qf|Homer}} No, we won't. I've got it all figured out. The baby can have Bart's crib and Bart'll sleep with us until he's 21.
 
 
{{qf|Marge}} Won't that warp him?
 
{{qf|Marge}} Won't that warp him?
{{qf|Homer}} My cousin Frank did it.
+
{{qf|Homer}} My [[Francine Simpson|cousin Frank]] did it.
 
{{qf|Marge}} You don't have a cousin Frank.
 
{{qf|Marge}} You don't have a cousin Frank.
{{qf|Homer}} He became Francine back in '76. Then he joined that cult. I think his name is Mother Shabubu now.
+
{{qf|Homer}} He became Francine back in '76. Then he joined that cult. I think his name is Mother Shabubu, now.
 
----
 
----
{{qf|[[Selma]]}} Hey Bart, want a dollar? Uh uh uh, you know what I wanna hear.
+
{{qf|[[Realty agent]]}} Once you get used to the smell of melted hog fat, you'll wonder how you ever did without it.
{{qf|Bart}} ''[singing]'' I'm a little teapot short and stout, this is my handle this is my spout. The incy wincy spider went up the water spout...
+
{{qf|Homer}} Mmmm. Hog fat.
{{qf|Selma}} Oh yeah! Love that spout medley.
 
----
 
{{qf|Marge}} Once we get the cats out of the way, it won't be too bad.
 
{{qf|[[Realty agent]]}} Actually, according to the will, the cats own the house. You'd be their tenants!
 
{{qf|Lisa}} I wish we lived in the kitty house.
 
{{qf|Bart}} I could've trained them to be my unholy army of the night. Go, my pretties! Kill! Kill!
 
 
----
 
----
 
{{qf|Homer}} Dad, I have a problem.
 
{{qf|Homer}} Dad, I have a problem.
{{qf|[[Grampa]]}} Why did you come to me? I don't know nothin'. I used to get by on my looks. Now they're gone... withered away like an old piece of fruit. ''[sobs]''
+
{{qf|[[Grampa]]}} Why'd you come to me. I don't know nothing. I used to get by on my looks. Now they're gone—withered away like an old piece of fruit. ''[sobs]''
 
{{qf|Homer}} Are you done?
 
{{qf|Homer}} Are you done?
{{qf|Grampa}} No, not yet! I was voted the handsomest boy in [[Albany]], [[New York]]!
+
{{qf|Grampa}} No, not yet. I was voted the handsomest boy in [[Albany]], [[New York]].
{{qf|Homer}} Dad, I don't need advice! I need $15,000 to buy a home!
+
{{qf|Homer}} Dad, I don't need advice, I need $15,000 to buy a home.
{{qf|Grampa}} Oh, well. All I own is this house, that I built with my own two hands!
+
{{qf|Grampa}} Oh! Well, all I own is this house, that I built with my own two hands.
{{qf|Homer}} You didn't build this house! You won it on a crooked 50's game show!
+
{{qf|Homer}} You didn't build this house. You won it on a crooked '50's game show!
{{qf|Grampa}} I ratted on everybody and got off scot-free!
+
{{qf|Grampa}} I ratted on everybody and got off scot free!
 
----
 
----
{{qf|Grampa}} All right, son, I'll sell this dump and write you a check.
+
{{qf|Homer}} Dad, first you gave me life, now you've given me a home for my family. I'd be honored if you came to live with us.
{{qf|Homer}} Dad, first you gave me life, now you've given me a home for my family, I'd be honored if you came to live with us.
+
{{qf|Grampa}} Thank you.
{{qf|Grampa}} Thank you!
+
:''[in the present]''
{{qf|Bart}} ''[in the present]'' So how long before you shipped Grampa off to the old-folks home?
+
{{qf|Bart}} So, how long before you shipped Grampa off to the old folks home?
 
{{qf|Homer}} About three weeks.
 
{{qf|Homer}} About three weeks.
 
:''[Everyone laughs.]''
 
 
----
 
----
{{qf|Lisa}} When do we get to my first word?
+
{{qf|Lisa}} When are we going to get to my first word?
{{qf|Homer}} Your what?
+
{{qf|Homer}} Your what-what?
{{qf|Lisa}} My first words!
+
{{qf|Lisa}} My first word.
{{qf|Homer}} Nah, you don't want to hear that story. I know. I'll tell you about the time I got locked in the bank vault with Mr. Mooney. It was another one of my harebrained schemes.
+
{{qf|Homer}} Eh, you don't want to hear that story. I know! I'll tell you about the time I got locked in the bank vault with Mr. Mooney. It was another one of my hair-brained schemes.
 
{{qf|Lisa}} Dad!
 
{{qf|Lisa}} Dad!
{{qf|Homer}} Wait a minute. That was "The Lucy Show". Okay, where were we?
+
{{qf|Homer}} Wait a minute. That was a "Lucy" show...
{{qf|Bart}} Mom was preggers and Dad threw all our money down a sink hole.
 
----
 
{{qf|[[Ned]]}} If you need anything just give a whistle.
 
{{qf|Homer}} I could use a TV tray.
 
{{qf|Ned}} Well, gee...
 
{{qf|Homer}} What?
 
{{qf|Ned}} Uh, I just this minute bought it at the hardware...
 
{{qf|Homer}} You said "anything".
 
{{qf|Ned}} Heh, sure, you can borrow it for...a little while.
 
{{qf|Homer}} ''[in the present]'' And that little while is now 8 years and counting. Heh, heh, heh.
 
----
 
{{qf|Bart}} ''[during his "terrible two's" phase; he's banging pans and chanting while Marge is resting in her bedroom with a washcloth on her forehead]'' I am so great! I am so great! Everybody loves me, I am so great!
 
{{qf|Marge}} Honey, honey, honey, honey, honey. Could you please be quiet?
 
{{qf|Bart}} Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! Quie --
 
{{qf|Marge}} Bart, get out!
 
----
 
{{qf|Homer}} It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day.
 
 
----
 
----
{{qf|Bart}} [[Krusty]] funny!
+
{{qf|Marge}} Bart, from now on, the baby sleeps in the crib.
{{qf|Homer}} Duh.
+
{{qf|Bart}} Crib! Crib! I'm a baby!
 +
{{qf|Homer}} All right, I know how to handle this. Just use a little reverse psychology. Let's go, Marge. Leave the baby with his little crib.
 
----
 
----
{{qf|Bart}} Can't sleep, clown'll eat me.
+
{{qf|Bart}} Can't sleep... Clown'll eat me... Can't sleep... Clown'll eat me...
 
----
 
----
{{qf|Marge}} Homer, I think the baby is coming.
+
{{qf|Marge}} Homie... I think the baby's coming.
 
{{qf|Homer}} Wow. A baby and a free burger. Could this be the best day of my life?
 
{{qf|Homer}} Wow. A baby and a free burger. Could this be the best day of my life?
{{qf|TV Announcer}} Next up, an hour-long episode of "Mama's Family."
+
{{qf|Sportscaster}} Coming up next, an hour-long episode of ''[[Mama's Family]]''.
 
{{qf|Homer}} Yes!
 
{{qf|Homer}} Yes!
 
----
 
----
{{qf|Ned}} We'll take good care of your boy, Simpson. Enjoy the miracle of creation!
+
{{qf|[[Rod Flanders]]}} Oh boy! Liver!
{{qf|Homer}} Shut up, Flanders.
+
{{qf|[[Todd Flanders]]}} Iron helps us play!
----
 
{{qf|Ned}} Supper time, boys!
 
{{qf|[[Todd]]}} Oh boy: liver!
 
{{qf|[[Rod]]}} Iron helps us play.
 
----
 
{{qf|Marge}} ''[about Bart after Lisa's born]'' According to this magazine, Bart might be jealous of her.
 
{{qf|Homer}} Well, Bart can kiss my hairy yellow butt.
 
 
----
 
----
{{qf|Marge}} I saved this newspaper from the day Lisa was born.
+
{{qf|[[Dr. Hibbert]]}} She has the reflexes of a young [[Mary Lou Retton]]. Have a wowwy-pop.
{{qf|Lisa}} Mondale to Hart: "Where's the beef?"
+
{{qf|Bart}} Can I have a lolly-pop?
{{qf|Bart}} "Where's the beef?" What the hell that's supposed to mean?
+
{{qf|Dr. Hibbert}} Oh Bart, I'm afraid that was the last one. But I've got something even better for you—a rubella inoculation.
{{qf|Homer}} ''[laughs]'' "Where's the beef"... No wonder he won Minnesota.
 
 
----
 
----
{{qf|Patty}} The older they get, the cuter they ain't.
+
{{qf|Bart}} I liked it when it was me, Mom and Homer. You wrecked everything. I'm leaving. Goodbye.
 +
{{qf|Lisa}} Bart.
 +
{{qf|Bart}} What did you say?
 +
{{qf|Lisa}} Bart!
 +
{{qf|Bart}} Sufferin' succotash! You can talk!
 +
:''[takes Lisa downstairs]''
 +
{{qf|Bart}} Mom, Dad, she can talk! Say it again, Lis.
 +
{{qf|Lisa}} Bart. Bart Bart Bart Bart Bart.
 +
{{qf|Bart}} I'm her first word!
 
----
 
----
{{qf|[[Dr. Hibbert]]}} ''[at Lisa's checkup]'' ''[laughs]'' She has the relexes of a young [[Mary Lou Retton]]. Have a wowwipop. ''[gives Lisa one]''
+
{{qf|Marge}} Lisa, can you say "Mommy"?
{{qf|Bart}} Can I have a lollipop?
+
{{qf|Lisa}} Mommy.
{{qf|Dr. Hibbert}} Oh Bart, I'm afraid that was the last one. But I've got something even better for you: a rubella inoculation! ''[holds up a giant needle]''
+
{{qf|Bart}} Can you say "[[David Hasselhoff]]"?
 +
{{qf|Lisa}} Davah Hassahoff.
 +
{{qf|Homer}} Can you say "Daddy"?
 +
{{qf|Lisa}} Homer.
 +
{{qf|Homer}} No, sweetie. "Daddy."
 +
{{qf|Lisa}} ''[pauses]'' Homer.
 
----
 
----
{{qf|Bart}} I wanna hold the baby. I wanna hold the baby.
+
{{qf|Homer}} Y'know, Maggie, the sooner kids talk, the sooner they talk back. I hope you never say a word.
{{qf|Marge}} I'm sorry, Bart, you're too little.
+
{{qf|Maggie}} Daddy.
{{qf|Homer}} Here, Bart, you can hold my beer. ''[puts it on his head]''
 
  
 
{{Season 4|Q}}
 
{{Season 4|Q}}

Latest revision as of 17:36, April 26, 2024


Season 4 Episode Quotes
068 "Mr. Plow"
069
"Lisa's First Word"
"Homer's Triple Bypass" 070


Marge: Maggie, can you say ba-ba? Can you say Ma-ma?
Bart: Can you say "get bent"?
Marge: Bart!
Bart: Mister Rogers says it all the time.
Marge: He does not.
Homer: Maggie, can you say "daddy"? Dad-dy?
Marge: "Kit-ty"? "Kit-ty"?
Lisa: "Be-bop"? "Be-bop"?
Bart: "Shove it?" "Shove it?"
Maggie: [burps]
Homer: Did you hear that? She said "burlap."

Marge: According to Fretful Mother magazine, if Maggie doesn't talk by age one, we should consider a corrective tongue extender.

Marge: Well, this story begins in this unforgettable spring of 1983: Ms. Pac-Man struck a blow for women's rights... a young Joe Piscopo taught us how to laugh.

Marge: Guess what, Homie... There's going to be twice as much love in this house as there is now.
Homer: We're gonna start doin' it in the morning?
Marge: No.

Marge: I'm afraid we're going to need a bigger place.
Homer: No, we won't. I've got it all figured out. The baby can have Bart's crib and Bart can sleep with us until he's 21!
Marge: Won't that warp him?
Homer: My cousin Frank did it.
Marge: You don't have a cousin Frank.
Homer: He became Francine back in '76. Then he joined that cult. I think his name is Mother Shabubu, now.

Realty agent: Once you get used to the smell of melted hog fat, you'll wonder how you ever did without it.
Homer: Mmmm. Hog fat.

Homer: Dad, I have a problem.
Grampa: Why'd you come to me. I don't know nothing. I used to get by on my looks. Now they're gone—withered away like an old piece of fruit. [sobs]
Homer: Are you done?
Grampa: No, not yet. I was voted the handsomest boy in Albany, New York.
Homer: Dad, I don't need advice, I need $15,000 to buy a home.
Grampa: Oh! Well, all I own is this house, that I built with my own two hands.
Homer: You didn't build this house. You won it on a crooked '50's game show!
Grampa: I ratted on everybody and got off scot free!

Homer: Dad, first you gave me life, now you've given me a home for my family. I'd be honored if you came to live with us.
Grampa: Thank you.
[in the present]
Bart: So, how long before you shipped Grampa off to the old folks home?
Homer: About three weeks.

Lisa: When are we going to get to my first word?
Homer: Your what-what?
Lisa: My first word.
Homer: Eh, you don't want to hear that story. I know! I'll tell you about the time I got locked in the bank vault with Mr. Mooney. It was another one of my hair-brained schemes.
Lisa: Dad!
Homer: Wait a minute. That was a "Lucy" show...

Marge: Bart, from now on, the baby sleeps in the crib.
Bart: Crib! Crib! I'm a baby!
Homer: All right, I know how to handle this. Just use a little reverse psychology. Let's go, Marge. Leave the baby with his little crib.

Bart: Can't sleep... Clown'll eat me... Can't sleep... Clown'll eat me...

Marge: Homie... I think the baby's coming.
Homer: Wow. A baby and a free burger. Could this be the best day of my life?
Sportscaster: Coming up next, an hour-long episode of Mama's Family.
Homer: Yes!

Rod Flanders: Oh boy! Liver!
Todd Flanders: Iron helps us play!

Dr. Hibbert: She has the reflexes of a young Mary Lou Retton. Have a wowwy-pop.
Bart: Can I have a lolly-pop?
Dr. Hibbert: Oh Bart, I'm afraid that was the last one. But I've got something even better for you—a rubella inoculation.

Bart: I liked it when it was me, Mom and Homer. You wrecked everything. I'm leaving. Goodbye.
Lisa: Bart.
Bart: What did you say?
Lisa: Bart!
Bart: Sufferin' succotash! You can talk!
[takes Lisa downstairs]
Bart: Mom, Dad, she can talk! Say it again, Lis.
Lisa: Bart. Bart Bart Bart Bart Bart.
Bart: I'm her first word!

Marge: Lisa, can you say "Mommy"?
Lisa: Mommy.
Bart: Can you say "David Hasselhoff"?
Lisa: Davah Hassahoff.
Homer: Can you say "Daddy"?
Lisa: Homer.
Homer: No, sweetie. "Daddy."
Lisa: [pauses] Homer.

Homer: Y'know, Maggie, the sooner kids talk, the sooner they talk back. I hope you never say a word.
Maggie: Daddy.
Season 4 Quotes
Kamp Krusty A Streetcar Named Marge Homer the Heretic Lisa the Beauty Queen Treehouse of Horror III Itchy & Scratchy: The Movie Marge Gets a Job New Kid on the Block Mr. Plow Lisa's First Word Homer's Triple Bypass Marge vs. the Monorail Selma's Choice Brother from the Same Planet I Love Lisa Duffless Last Exit to Springfield So It's Come to This: A Simpsons Clip Show The Front Whacking Day Marge in Chains Krusty Gets Kancelled