Every Man's Dream/Quotes
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- Candace: I'm pretty fascinating myself. I'm an author.
- Homer: I thought you were a pharmacist.
- Candace: Tennessee Williams worked in a shoe factory.
- Homer: You were pretty quick with that fact.
- Homer: Marge, after all my divorce-worthy statements and actions-many of which you don't know about-how can you kick me out now that I'm sick?
- Homer: You're pregnant? But I kept my shirt on!
- Marge: Homie, you have no idea what it's like being married to you.
- Marge: I know this marriage isn't perfect, or even great, but now I even treasure the moments where it's just so-so.
- Marge: Dr. Hibbert called in a prescription for you to pick up.
- Homer: Narcolepsy.
- Marge: Yes, for narcolepsy, which you should get now.
- Marge: I smell beer. Did you go to Moe's?
- Homer: Every time I have beer on my breath, you assume I've been drinking.
- Marge: Did you at least get the medicine?
- Homer: I tried, and I failed. Miserably.
- Therapist: Like all married women you're sick of your husband. But sometimes you're afraid of losing him.
- Homer: And like all married men, I didn't hear that first thing and am overconfident of the second.
- Homer: [to the Therapist] And you thought our only option was to break up.
- Therapist: I never said that. If I told people that didn't belong together they shouldn't be together, I'd be out of a job.
- Homer: Huh, I must have dreamed that, too.
- Bart: [crying] Why is Daddy leaving? Is it all my fault?
- [laughs]
- Bart: Man, I've been waiting to do that for a long time.
- [shouts]
- Bart: All my problems are my parents' fault!
- Candace: I'm just floating this, but have you ever thought it's a good thing that Marge dumped you? I mean, I've dated more girls than you.
- Homer: I would love to get into snowman shape. I can’t even fit into my scarf anymore.