I Married Marge/Quotes
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- Homer: 1980 happened before you kids were born, and there was a lot going on. The hits of Supertramp, the dark horse presidential candidacy of John Anderson; it was an exciting time to be young.
- [Flashback to 1980. "The Logical Song" by Supertramp plays in the background. Homer is shown working at one of his old jobs on Sir Putt-a-Lot's Minature Golf Course. Homer's boss opens up a door to the minature windmill.]
- Homer's Boss: Whoa Homer! Not so fast! The customers are complaining.
- Homer: Sorry, sir. How about this?
- [Homer slows down his turning the windmill blades.]
- Homer's Boss: Now you are getting it! Good work! Keep it up Homer, and you may one day be the man who hands the customers their putters at the first hole.
- Homer: Nice.
- [Cut to present. Homer sees a distracted Bart and Lisa playing outdoors. Homer opens window and bellows out.]
- Homer: Hey, you two! I am trying to tell the story of how you were born!
- [Bart]: I thought that was the story. You got had a problem turning blades but you overcame it and got promoted, the end. What a great story!
- [Lisa]: I am sorry Dad, but television has caused a short attention span.
- [Homer is on a date with Marge at the Aztec Theatre. They have just seen "Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back". The exit the first show as the infamous "Imperial March" is playing in the background. Customers are in line for the second show of the evening.]
- Homer: Wow! What an ending! Who would have thought Darth Vader is Luke Skywalker's father?
- Moviegoers: Oh, thank you! Hey! Thank you, Mr. Blow-the-Picture-for-Me!
- [After seeing "The Empire Strikes Back" Homer takes Marge to his workplace, where they sneak inside the miniature castle and watch golf balls travel down ramps.]
- Homer: Someday I will buy you a real castle.
- Marge: Oh Homer, you do not have to do that!
- Homer: Oh! Whew, that is a relief! You know Marge, looking at you I see the beauty of Princess Leia and the wisdom of Yoda.
- Marge: Homer, maybe it is the Champale talking, but I think you are pretty sexy yourself.
- Homer: It is the Champale talking!
- [Homer and Marge start making out. Scene shifts outdoors.]
- Marge: [offscreen] What if we get caught?
- Homer: [offscreen] Don't be. This castle is impregnable.
- [On the minature golf course, a customer hits a golf ball into a hard-to-hit hole that says "FREE GAME", causing bells to ring and the castle to light up colorfully.]
- [Homer is making application to the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant. He is near a reception with two other applicants. A younger Smithers does the interviews.]
- Smithers: We have two openings, which means one of you will be rejected from this job...but it ain't gonna be my old frat buddy Lou Johnston!
- [Smithers greets Man #1 and they do a secret handshake.]
- Man #1: Ah Waylon! Still the same guy from Alpha Beta!
- Man #2: Hey! I am a member of the University of Alabama chapter!
- [Smithers and two men enter into room. Homer tries mimicking their fraternity song, but he knows the odds are stacked against him.]