Difference between revisions of "Pranksta Rap/Quotes"
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− | + | {{qf|Marge}} Rap music promotes violence and rudeness to hoes. | |
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− | + | {{qf|Bart}} I lied about being kidnapped. The whole thing was a hoax.<br />'''Wiggum:''' A hoax? A hoax!? Aw please, you can't takes this away from me! How would I explain it to [[Ralph Wiggum|Ralphie]]? That kid can't understand where the world goes when you close the drapes. | |
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− | '' | + | ''[Bart's rap]''<br />Don't critique my technique<br />I'm no geek.<br />I make the principal nervous<br />my friends can confirm this<br />I'll bust a spitwad in your epidermis<br />you can trace my remorse to its super-sized source<br />a hungry, hungry hypocrite named Homer, of course<br />my old man's pathetic<br />damn is his head thick<br />the gas from his ass is carcinogenic<br />every day I pray his DNA ain't genetic. |
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− | + | {{qf|Bart}} Well, I paid for this ticket. That makes me an adult. I'm going! ''[Bart leaves for a second, then comes back, hugging his [[Krusty the Clown|Krusty]] doll.]'' I wuv you Krusty, Wusty! ''[Bart kisses his doll and leaves]'' | |
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− | + | {{qf|50 Cent}} Yo! B, I heard you throw down on stage, wanna join my world tour?<br />'''Bart''': Sorry, Fiddy, I have school tomorrow.<br />'''50 Cent''': You're right. The more you know, the further you go, and that's one to grow on. (turns to his assistant) Does that count as community service?<br />'''Assistant''': No!<br />'''50 Cent''': A'ight take us to the park. We'll go pick up some dog poop.<br />'''Assistant''': Yes, sir! | |
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− | + | {{qf|Milhouse}} Are you mad at me?<br />'''Bart:''' No, it's not about you.<br />'''Milhouse:''' ''[disappointed]'' Oh, it's never about me! | |
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− | + | {{qf|Bart}} Man, are you illin'.<br />'''Lisa:''' Rappers stopped saying "illin'" twelve years ago.<br />'''Bart:''' I'm keepin' it real!<br />'''Lisa:''' They stopped saying "keepin' it real" '''''three''''' years ago.<br />'''Bart:''' Mom! Lisa's dissin' me!<br />'''Marge:''' "Dissin'"? Do rappers still say that? | |
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− | + | {{qf|Chief Wiggum}} (reads headlines to self) "Wiggum Sleeps Through Riot", "Top Cop Surrenders to Backfiring Car", "Firemen Rescue Police Chief from Tree", "Commission: Wiggum Sucks" Wow I should have read these headlines a long time ago. Together they really paint a picture... a failure. And now, my only friend is the bottle (pulls out bottle of maple syrup and pancakes)<br />'''Barney Fife (later):''' Rise and shine, Chief Wiggum. This pity party is over.<br />'''Wiggum (startled):''' Wha?! Officer down! ''[sees Fife on the TV]'' Barney Fife?!<br />'''Barney:''' Y-E-S spells "you got it, buster!" and I wanna tell you that the feelings you have are common for every ''[sniff]'' brother of the badge.<br />'''Wiggum:''' Yeah, well my fat grew over my badge.<br />'''Barney:''' Oh, sour mash. You just gotta pull together and get the old ''[sniff]'' crime-sniffer out on the street.<br />'''Wiggum:''' You're right! It's time I buckle down and really do some police work!<br />'''Barney:''' Now that's the can-do attitude that puts dudes in the can! Ha, ha, ha. Well, I'm wanted back on the set.<br />'''Wiggum:''' Set? Are you the character or the actor who plays him?<br />'''Barney (ghost-like voice):''' Now, I must goooooo!<br />'''Wiggum:''' What a minute. Now you're a ghost?<br />'''Barney:''' Avenge meeee! | |
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− | + | {{qf|Alcatraaaz}} (throws Bart a Murder 4 Life jersey) Here ya go ya little yellow cracka. (to driver) Now let's go murder our enemies. (to Bart) Peace! | |
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− | + | {{qf|Homer}} Bart's gone! I checked everywhere.<br />'''Marge:''' That little sneak disobeyed us and went to that hip hop festival!<br />'''Homer:''' If that's true he's gonna be like N.W.A: Not Without Ass-welts! | |
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− | + | {{qf|Kirk}} Oh baby, what could be better than video poker and Chintsy-Pop? ''[takes a handful of popcorn]'' Wow! I'm lookin' at an inside straight! ''[presses a button, which replaces the ace with a five. The word "LOSER" appears with the losing music]'' Someday I'll hear the winning music. Someday. | |
{{Season 16|Q}} | {{Season 16|Q}} |
Revision as of 07:00, August 20, 2019
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- Marge: Rap music promotes violence and rudeness to hoes.
- Bart: I lied about being kidnapped. The whole thing was a hoax.
Wiggum: A hoax? A hoax!? Aw please, you can't takes this away from me! How would I explain it to Ralphie? That kid can't understand where the world goes when you close the drapes.
[Bart's rap]
Don't critique my technique
I'm no geek.
I make the principal nervous
my friends can confirm this
I'll bust a spitwad in your epidermis
you can trace my remorse to its super-sized source
a hungry, hungry hypocrite named Homer, of course
my old man's pathetic
damn is his head thick
the gas from his ass is carcinogenic
every day I pray his DNA ain't genetic.
- Bart: Well, I paid for this ticket. That makes me an adult. I'm going! [Bart leaves for a second, then comes back, hugging his Krusty doll.] I wuv you Krusty, Wusty! [Bart kisses his doll and leaves]
- 50 Cent: Yo! B, I heard you throw down on stage, wanna join my world tour?
Bart: Sorry, Fiddy, I have school tomorrow.
50 Cent: You're right. The more you know, the further you go, and that's one to grow on. (turns to his assistant) Does that count as community service?
Assistant: No!
50 Cent: A'ight take us to the park. We'll go pick up some dog poop.
Assistant: Yes, sir!
- Milhouse: Are you mad at me?
Bart: No, it's not about you.
Milhouse: [disappointed] Oh, it's never about me!
- Bart: Man, are you illin'.
Lisa: Rappers stopped saying "illin'" twelve years ago.
Bart: I'm keepin' it real!
Lisa: They stopped saying "keepin' it real" three years ago.
Bart: Mom! Lisa's dissin' me!
Marge: "Dissin'"? Do rappers still say that?
- Chief Wiggum: (reads headlines to self) "Wiggum Sleeps Through Riot", "Top Cop Surrenders to Backfiring Car", "Firemen Rescue Police Chief from Tree", "Commission: Wiggum Sucks" Wow I should have read these headlines a long time ago. Together they really paint a picture... a failure. And now, my only friend is the bottle (pulls out bottle of maple syrup and pancakes)
Barney Fife (later): Rise and shine, Chief Wiggum. This pity party is over.
Wiggum (startled): Wha?! Officer down! [sees Fife on the TV] Barney Fife?!
Barney: Y-E-S spells "you got it, buster!" and I wanna tell you that the feelings you have are common for every [sniff] brother of the badge.
Wiggum: Yeah, well my fat grew over my badge.
Barney: Oh, sour mash. You just gotta pull together and get the old [sniff] crime-sniffer out on the street.
Wiggum: You're right! It's time I buckle down and really do some police work!
Barney: Now that's the can-do attitude that puts dudes in the can! Ha, ha, ha. Well, I'm wanted back on the set.
Wiggum: Set? Are you the character or the actor who plays him?
Barney (ghost-like voice): Now, I must goooooo!
Wiggum: What a minute. Now you're a ghost?
Barney: Avenge meeee!
- Alcatraaaz: (throws Bart a Murder 4 Life jersey) Here ya go ya little yellow cracka. (to driver) Now let's go murder our enemies. (to Bart) Peace!
- Homer: Bart's gone! I checked everywhere.
Marge: That little sneak disobeyed us and went to that hip hop festival!
Homer: If that's true he's gonna be like N.W.A: Not Without Ass-welts!
- Kirk: Oh baby, what could be better than video poker and Chintsy-Pop? [takes a handful of popcorn] Wow! I'm lookin' at an inside straight! [presses a button, which replaces the ace with a five. The word "LOSER" appears with the losing music] Someday I'll hear the winning music. Someday.