The Simpsons: Tapped Out The Invasion Before Christmas content update/Premium Gameplay

The Birth of a Notion

The Birth of a Notion Pt. 1

After tapping on J. Rigellian Christ's exclamation mark: Behold, I have come, your tentacled messiah. Happy Morphistic Quiznox indeed! Welcome out of the egg sack, my son and lord! Let me lick the birth slime off you. Not now, Mother, I have to spread the good word...about conquering all other creatures in the universe. First, though, I'm hungry. I believe the newborn of our species usually devour the father? In that case, bad news... Task: Make J. Rigellian Christ Go Hungry (4h, Manger) Quest reward: 100 and 10

The Birth of a Notion Pt. 2

After tapping on J. Rigellian Christ's exclamation mark: Friends, I am only a humble squid-creature, but I bring a wonderful message of peace. Peace throughout the galaxy, after we conquer it and enslave all other races. Lead us and we shall follow, since we have nothing better to do. Great. But first, can anybody spare some food? I'm already ten minutes old and I didn't get to devour my father. Anyone? No? *sighs*Fine, I'll work on my sermon. Task: Make J. Rigellian Christ Prepare to Preach (1h, Manger) Quest reward: 100 and 10

The Birth of a Notion Pt. 3

After tapping on J. Rigellian Christ's exclamation mark: People of Earth, I bring you good news. Your conquest is certain. Resistance is futile. Why is that good news? It's going to save you a lot of wasted time and effort resisting. Hear the good word! Task: Make J. Rigellian Christ Preach Love and Peace (4h, Manger) Quest reward: 100 and 10

The Birth of a Notion Pt. 4

After tapping on J. Rigellian Christ's exclamation mark: Mother, I have preached to the humans my glad tidings: that resistance is futile. But they heed me not. Perhaps you would get wider attention if you broadcast over the human "Internet", a primitive network they use to send naughty pictures. Ah yes, unlike our far more sophisticated Rigellian "dirty magazines". But first, you'll have to set up Wi-Fi. Shouldn't be hard. After all, I am the Son of Cthulhu. Task: Make J. Rigellian Christ Struggle to Set up Wi-Fi (4h, Manger) Quest reward: 100 and 10

The Birth of a Notion Pt. 5

After tapping on J. Rigellian Christ's exclamation mark: Finally, I finished setting up the Wi-Fi. That's thirty hours of my life I won't get back. Luckily, I'm immortal. What do people think of your MyTube channel? They left some pretty nasty comments! They're calling me a patriarchal oppressor. Inaccurate! Our species is a matriarchy. The females inject their eggs into the males' abdomens, where they hatch and feed on the organs. I'll just calmly post a message explaining my point of view. I'm sure the internet will be tolerant of my opinion. Task: Make J. Rigellian Christ Be Crucified by the Internet (8h) Talking to those jerks literally killed me! I will return for the Last Judgment. And I'm going to be in a bad mood. Quest reward: 200 and 20

Jesus Christ, Alien Superstar

After buying Festive Rigellian Queen Facade: Aw, Mom. You got all dressed up for my birthday! Don't get too excited. Human Christmas happens to coincide with the Festival of the Morphistic Quiznox. What does that celebrate? No one is sure, but we celebrate it by choosing a sacrifice and tearing his tentacles off one by one. So, it must be something pretty wonderful. Task: Tap on the Festive Rigellian Queen Quest reward: 100 and 10

To Thine Own Elf Be True

To Thine Own Elf Be True Pt. 1

After tapping on Bart's exclamation mark: Hey, Lis -- Sky Finger turned us into elves. Wow, I actually have long skinny toes that curl all the way back in my curly-toe boots. Now to sneak into the North Pole and see what Santa is bringing us for Christmas. Bart, that's the ultimate naughtiness. I'm going to stay here and spin candy canes, or whatever it is elves do. Don't want to know if you're getting a pony this year? Well...maybe I should find out...in case I need to come up with a name. Task: Make Elf Bart Prep to Sneak Into Santa's House (4h, Simpson House) Task: Make Elf Lisa Come up With Pony Names (4h, Simpson House) Quest reward: 100 and 10

To Thine Own Elf Be True Pt. 2

After tapping on Bart's exclamation mark: We're in the North Pole, Lis! You scan the computers for a nice/naughty list, I'll check the warehouses for presents labeled us. Roger. If you find any cookies, remember what kind they are. We want to bribe Santa with something he really loves. Hey! What are you two doing wandering the halls? It's almost Christmas, no goofing off! Uh, we're hall monitors. I'M a hall monitor! The sash is a fleshy outgrowth of my skin. Now get back to work! Task: Make Elf Bart Make Toys (4h, Simpson House) Task: Make Elf Lisa Clock In (4h, Simpson House) Quest reward: 100 and 10

To Thine Own Elf Be True Pt. 3

After tapping on Bart's exclamation mark: Man, being an elf is hard work. Making toys all day sucks! Yeah. Although I do enjoy the breaks we get for dancing a happy jig. No kidding! Jig dancing is awesome. Jig jig jig! Jig jig jig! You two! The head elf wants to see you. Now! But it's two minutes to jig dancing! Task: Make Elf Bart and Elf Lisa Report to the Head Elf (60m, Simpson House) Quest reward: 100 and 10

To Thine Own Elf Be True Pt. 4

After tapping on Bart's exclamation mark: You two are completely messing up our production schedule. What? I'm cranking out Sergeant Activity dolls like crazy. But with zero quality control. FYI, the head attaches to the neck, not the butt. And you, female elf. You've brought our assembly line to a halt with your agonizing over what color to make the pony manes. But there's so many great glitter choices! I'm putting you two on super-low priority jobs. Boy elf, you'll be making toys for a stinker called "Bart Simpson". And girl elf, you'll be making them for a fusspot called "Lisa". Task: Make Elf Bart Make Low-Quality Toys for Himself (4h, Simpson House) Task: Make Elf Lisa Never Finish Toys for Herself (4h, Simpson House) Quest reward: 100 and 10

To Thine Own Elf Be True Pt. 5

After tapping on Lisa's exclamation mark: Santa, we have something to admit. We're actually human kids who got transformed into elves, and snuck into the North Pole to check out the goodies, like any red-blooded American jerks. Please, can we stop making terrible toys for ourselves? Ho, ho, ho. I knew about your plan from the start. And I decided to teach you a lesson. I will forgive you, but only if you do one thing: spread holiday cheer around Springfield. We don't know how to do that. Sure you do! Jig jig jig! Task: Make Elf Bart and Elf Lisa Spread Holiday Cheer (1h, Simpson House) Quest reward: 200 and 20

Let's Take a Pole: North or South?

After building Rigellian North Pole: Kang, I have finally finished a North Pole for you to play Santa in. There are many sappy human movies that imply this place is a source of "magic". And it is true! I can feel it in my bones! Well, not bones, more like our series of fluid-filled sacs, but you get the idea! Thank you, Kodos. Well, go ahead! Try it out! Task: Make Kodos Enjoy the North Pole (4h, Rigellian North Pole) Quest reward: 100 and 10

The War on Christmas

After placing Santa's Plane Sled: Ah, this old sleigh. Takes me back to 1942, when Abe Simpson shot me down over the Pacific. We had to cobble this thing together so you could finish Christmas. Abe, how about joining me in a glass of eggnog for old times sake? No way. Last time I went drinking with you, I woke up naked and on my forehead someone had written "I lick elf bells". Task: Tap on Santa's Plane Sled Quest reward: 100 and 10

Snakes on a Sleigh

After placing Snake Eating Rudolph: ...Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen...All shackled up and ready to go. We just need Rudolph. Uh, Santa? Remember how Bart Simpson asked for a python for Christmas? And we said no, that's too dangerous, but you said, "Aw, let him have it, maybe we'll get lucky and it'll eat him". The snake got hungry early. Task: Tap on the Snake Eating Rudolph Quest reward: 100 and 10

A Rocky Relationship

After tapping on Moe's exclamation mark: An Alaskan version of Moe's Tavern? Who looks at my bar and thinks, "I should copy that"? I mean, I love my bar, but only because I have to. You can divorce a wife, but you can't divorce a career. Maybe I'll take a look in Eski-Moe's, see what's up with those Alaskaholics. Task: Make Moe Try a Drink at Eski-Moe's (4h, Eski-Moe's) Drinks with ice?! I can't afford that in the lower 48. If people ask me for booze on the rocks, what they get is rocks. Quest reward: 100 and 10

That Was Zen, This Is Me-Ow

That Was Zen, This Is Me-Ow Pt. 1

After tapping on Lyla's exclamation mark: I, the former Zen priestess, have been reincarnated! But where? According to the laws of Karma, if I was good in my last life, I will be rewarded in this one. Apparently I came back to Springfield. Whatever I did in my past life must have been really bad. Oh, now I remember. I was making out with Montgomery Burns. So really, REALLY bad. Task: Make Lyla Zen Out (8h) Task: Make Burns Search for His Lost Love (8h, The Peak Inn) Quest reward: 100 and 10

That Was Zen, This Is Me-Ow Pt. 2

After tapping on Lyla's exclamation mark: Why have I been reincarnated as myself with all my memories in Springfield? I'm supposed to come back as something different. Like a cat. You have unfinished business. You died before you could experience the passions of love with...Montgomery Burns. Yuk. Only when you have sated your feminine fleshly desires can you escape the cycle of the time and achieve Nirvana. I'd still rather be a cat. Task: Make Lyla Repress Inner Desires (4h) Make Burns Sense Love Is Near (4h, Burns Homes (Control Building, Classic Mansion, Burns' Summer Mansion or Dr. Lenny's Lab)) Quest reward: 100 and 10

That Was Zen, This Is Me-Ow Pt. 3

After tapping on Lyla's exclamation mark: Maybe I should listen to Buddha, abandon my priestly chastity, and surrender to the temptations of the flesh. After all, Buddha is Enlightened. That's sort of like having a Ph.D in Psychology. I'll have to ask the ladies for advice about achieving earthly pleasure, though. Well don't ask me, 'cause Kirk ain't delivering! Oh, snap! Task: Make Lyla Explore Her French Sensuality (4h, The Peak Inn) Task: Make Springfield Ladies Complain About Their Sex Lives [x3] (4h, The Peak Inn) Quest reward: 100 and 10

That Was Zen, This Is Me-Ow Pt. 4

After tapping on Lyla's exclamation mark: Montgomery Burns, I have come for you! You'll never take me alive! I'll blow the nuclear plant sky high and take everyone with me! Oh, it's you Lyla. You're not freaked out that I've returned from the afterlife? Eh, coming back from death happens to me pretty much every week. Then let's achieve our own Earthly paradise. Kiss me with those blue lips, you wrinkled stickbag! Task: Make Lyla Share a Night of Passion (8h, The Peak Inn) Task: Make Burns Enjoy a Night of Passion (8h, The Peak Inn) Quest reward: 100 and 10

That Was Zen, This Is Me-Ow Pt. 5

After tapping on Lyla's exclamation mark: Oh, sweet Lyla, what a magical night of love. I've never been so satisfied. And you, my precious. Did you discover the joys of fleshly passion? Kind of. Shall we do it again tonight, honeysuckle? I'll get back to you. Task: Make Lyla Try to Escape the Cycle of Time (4h, The Peak Inn) Task: Make Burns Swoon (4h, The Peak Inn) Quest reward: 200 and 20

The Promised Land

After tapping on Krusty's exclamation mark: Ah, my boy! They finally finished building our holiday feasting place. Yeah, what would Jews do on Christmas if it weren't for Chinese restaurants? And what would Chinese restaurants do if it weren't for Jews? Let the gentiles eat their holiday gooses. I'm gonna get tso deep into some General Tso's chicken! Task: Make Krusty Enjoy a Meal (8h, Chinese Restaurant) Quest reward: 100 and 10

O Glitterbaum, O Glitterbaum

O Glitterbaum, O Glitterbaum Pt. 1

After tapping on Ralph's exclamation mark: Good news, Ralphie. You got the part of a Christmas tree in the school play. I know you wanted to be the Sugar Plum Fairy, but for that you have to hold in your pee for fifteen minutes. Yay! If I'm a tree, everyone will hang candy canes on me. Hey, that's right! This is going to be great. Now, let's decorate your costume. I want glitter. It tastes the best. Task: Make Christmas Tree Ralph Glitter Bomb Himself (4h) Quest reward: 100 and 10

O Glitterbaum, O Glitterbaum Pt. 2

After tapping on Ralph's exclamation mark: I have twinkles! Ralphie! Come back here! I didn't finish putting all the sparkles on the costume. Stars twinkle, too! I'm going into outer space! Whee-oo whee-oo! Ralphie! You know stars don't wear boas! Come back here! Task: Make Christmas Tree Ralph Rocket Into Space (4h, Wiggum House) Task: Make Chief Wiggum Chase After Ralph (4h, Wiggum House) Quest reward: 100 and 10

O Glitterbaum, O Glitterbaum Pt. 3

After tapping on Ralph's exclamation mark: I love my costume. When I grow up, I want to be a Christmas tree. Ralph, honey, it's bedtime. Take it off. No! I want to wear it in the bath, too! Let him be, Sarah. It's the first time he shown a passion for anything but boogers. Task: Make Christmas Tree Ralph Sleep in His Costume (4h, Wiggum House) Task: Make Chief Wiggum Feel Proud (4h, Wiggum House) Quest reward: 100 and 10

O Glitterbaum, O Glitterbaum Pt. 4

After tapping on Bart's exclamation mark: Hi, Lisa. I'm a cannonbaum. You look very festive. Ralph. Are those empty beer cans you have on your costume? I'm gluing on shiny things. Do you have any glue? I ate mine. Um, I do, but I'm saving it in case I, uh, also get hungry. O.K. Tree you later. Task: Make Christmas Tree Ralph Decorate Himself (4h) Task: Make Lisa Not Believe She Once Dated Ralph (4h, Simpson House) Quest reward: 100 and 10

O Glitterbaum, O Glitterbaum Pt. 5

After tapping on Ralph's exclamation mark: Mr. Mayor, little Ralphie has a request. He'd like to be the town Christmas tree. I wouldn't move even if a dog tickled me with his tummy water. Very well. But I must warn you, it doesn't pay and in January we throw you on the tire fire. Task: Make Christmas Tree Ralph Light Up the Town (4h, Wiggum House) Task: Make Springfielders Enjoy Christmas Tree Ralph (4h, Wiggum House) Quest reward: 200 and 20

The Animal Within

After completing : I bought an exotic petting zoo? What was I drinking? Nothing from my bar -- that booze is all water. You can count on me as a customer. When's the wet TV contest? And where do I stuff my dollar bills? Wait, are you thinkin' this is exotic ladies? It's an exotic ANIMAL petting zoo. Sorry. When I hear "exotic" and "petting" my mind goes where any crummy mayor's would. Task: Make Moe Prepare the Zoo (4h, Exotic Petting Zoo) Quest reward: Fully upgraded Exotic Petting Zoo, 100 and 10

Fixer Upper Fortress

After tapping on Comic Book Guy's exclamation mark: Ah, the Fortress of Lonelitude. The perfect place to hide my superior brain and morbidly obese body from the world. From its dark depths, I shall launch tweet storm after tweet storm. But you have leveled up from bachelorhood, husband. Great Scott, you're right! Now it's a Fortress of Lovelitude! In which case, you need to do some redecorating. Task: Make Comic Book Guy Update the Fortress (4h, Fortress of Lonelitude) Quest reward: Fully upgraded Fortress of Lonelitude, 100 and 10

Guess Who's Brahman to Dinner

Guess Who's Brahman to Dinner Pt. 1

After tapping on Shiva's exclamation mark: I have come to Springfield to fight a mighty demon, hideous and hugely fat. Yep, that's him there, cramming his face with pork chops. Hey, dude, can you use one of those extra arms to pass the gravy? Wow. What a water buffalo. I've never seen anything like it, and I've been around for 4.3 million years. Task: Make Shiva Admire Homer (6s, Kwik-E-Mart) Task: Make Homer Gorge (6s, Kwik-E-Mart) Quest reward: 100 and 10

Guess Who's Brahman to Dinner Pt. 2

After tapping on Shiva's exclamation mark: Homer, you are such an impressive and noble demon, I want to grant you a gift -- anything you want. I don't want to look a gift horse in the mouth -- I'd rather eat the gift horse -- but what's in it for you? I want to make a new friend. My wife's always saying I should get off the sofa and meet people. Your wife and mine must've gone to the same college: Nag U. Very amusing, demon! Now, choose your gift! Task: Make Homer Choose His Gift (4h, Kwik-E-Mart) Task: Make Shiva Balance Consciousness (4h) Quest reward: 100 and 10

Guess Who's Brahman to Dinner Pt. 3

After tapping on Shiva's exclamation mark: So, Homer, have you chosen the boon you wish to receive? I want anyone I put my hand on to turn into food. Weird, but sure. Tathaastu! It is done. Great. Now to try it out on a nice juicy overlord... Why are you looking at me like I'm a pork chop? I'm getting the Delhi out of here! Task: Make Homer Seek Shiva Around the House (4h, Kwik-E-Mart) Task: Make Shiva Hide in the Basement (4h, Kwik-E-Mart) Stupid delicious Shiva, where are you? Quest reward: 100 and 10

Guess Who's Brahman to Dinner Pt. 4

After tapping on Shiva's exclamation mark: Apu, have you seen Lord Shiva? I want to put my hand on his head and turn him into food. Hope you're cool with that. Well, He is one of the three primal Lords of the Cosmos, but on the other hand, you're a valued customer. I shouldn't tell you this, but if you want to summon Shiva, all you have to do is this little dance. Oh, not Bollywood! Task: Make Apu Teach Homer a Dance (60m, Kwik-E-Mart) Task: Make Homer Dance Like a Bollywood Star (1h, Kwik-E-Mart) Quest reward: 100 and 10

Guess Who's Brahman to Dinner Pt. 5

After tapping on Shiva's exclamation mark: Come on, Apu, I've been doing this dance for hours and it still hasn't summoned Shiva. I'm starving. Okay to finish the dance, spin around and put your hand on your head. Great, just like this... D'oh! Shiva, you can come out now. Homer has turned himself into food. Hot dogs, actually. Lesson learned: never grant a demon a boon. You might have saved yourself some hassle if you'd read the "Story of Bhasmasura". Task: Make Shiva Run the World (8h) Task: Make Apu Work an 8hr Shift (8h, Kwik-E-Mart) Task: Make Homer Try to Eat Himself (8h, Kwik-E-Mart) Quest reward: 200 and 20

Shiva Boss Fight Dialogue

After sending Shiva in a Battle of the B.S.: I'm so glad to have you join us, Shiva! High five! High FIVES. This is going to take a while.

Rabbi Krustofsky Boss Fight Dialogue

After sending Rabbi Krustofsky in a Battle of the B.S.: Feh! These aliens don't have the chutzpah to mess with the Angel of Yahweh. It's time to take these pishers to the laundromat – father and clown style!

Jesus' Birthday Promo

After tapping on Gil's mark: Hey there, pal! How'd you like to help someone who's had some pretty rough times? I'm talking about Jesus Christ, of course! So, help me show him we still remember his birthday! On offer accepted: Oh, wow. That's what I inappropriately call a mitzvah. Now I get to spend the holidays with the people I love... the blackjack dealers at Springfield Casino. I feel lucky, cha-cha-cha! On offer declined: No sale, huh? Boy, my boss is gonna be mad. He told me if I didn't make a sale I'd have to answer to Pontius Pilate. I don't know who that is, but I was kicked out of my last Pilates class for stealing the mats.

Joy to the Weird

Joy to the Weird Pt. 1

After tapping on Jesus Christ's exclamation mark: Another birthday, and no one seems to remember. It used to be a big deal. Carol singing, holiday sermons, solemn invocations... Now it seems like it's just a chance to watch college football. Which reminds me, I've had a lot a lot of prayers from USC fans. Guess I'll give them, oh, a 15-yard punt return. More than they deserve. Task: Make Jesus Feel Sad No One Remembers His Birthday (4h, Heavenly Swing Set) Quest reward: 100 and 10

Joy to the Weird Pt. 2

After tapping on Jesus Christ's exclamation mark: Enough sulking! I'll disguise my holy essence and go among the people. I'll find out what they're doing instead of celebrating my birthday. Hello, good tavern keeper. How are you spending the holiday? I'm remembering all my failed relationships. Then as a treat I'll either hang myself in the basement or stick my head in the oven. Whoa, don't do that! It's a mortal sin! Isn't there one family in this town who will take you in tonight? Well, there's Homer Simpson. He's got a big enough bar tab I expect he'll agree to anything. Task: Make Jesus Take Moe to the Simpsons (4h, Simpson House, Moe) Quest reward: 100 and 10

Joy to the Weird Pt. 3

After tapping on Jesus Christ's exclamation mark: Hi, Simpsons. I'm a super-cool regular dude who doesn't look anything like Jesus to you. Bart, how are you honoring the holidays? I'm playing a freemium game on my phone. That doesn't sound very religious. You'd be surprised. There's some deep stuff in here. That I doubt. Task: Make Jesus Cast Judgement (8h, Heavenly Swing Set) Quest reward: 100 and 10

Joy to the Weird Pt. 4

After tapping on Jesus Christ's exclamation mark: Lisa, what are you doing to celebrate Christmas? I ask as an apparently regular guy who doesn't look anything like Jesus to you. I'm praying for good will and peace among the people of the world. Oh! That sounds wonderfully me-ish. I mean, Christian. I'm Buddhist. Okay. But suppose Jesus appeared right here in front of you right now? That'd have to change your mind, right? I dunno. There's been an awful lot of holy visitations this December. Task: Make Jesus Sulk (4h, Heavenly Swing Set) Quest reward: 100 and 10

Joy to the Weird Pt. 5

After tapping on Jesus Christ's exclamation mark: Homer and Marge, how are you spending the holidays? Well, if you were Jesus... Which you aren't, because to us you don't look anything like him... We'd say we're trying to remember You the best way we can in this noisy, selfish world...by watching an animated Christmas special. But not a Simpsons Christmas episode. The people who do those are as cheaply cynical as they come. Task: Make Jesus Forgive Everyone but the Simpsons Count: 1x (8h, Heavenly Swing Set) Quest reward: 200 and 20

Unstable Stable

After tapping on Ned's exclamation mark: Oh, my stars! It's the Bethlehem stable that Jesus was born in! Boys, come over here and climb in the manger. I want to get a photo for Facelook. But I'll get fleas! Fleas that bit little Jesus. Forget what I said about the Vatican, those are the REAL holy parasites. Task: Tap on the Stable at the Inn Quest reward: 100 and 10

Third-Eye Watchtower

After tapping on Gautama Buddha's exclamation mark: Thank you, Jack Frost, for supplying the Belief System League with this wonderful Watchtower. Now we really can keep an eye on people! But how did you have the money for this thing? It's top-of-the-line tech! Got it cheap at an estate sale. Remember that dude Sauron? Well, he don't need no all-seeing eye no more. Actually, they're selling off everything in Mordor dirt-cheap. Really? Maybe I'll go grab some orcs. They couldn't complain any more than elves. Task: Make a B.S. Leaguer Set up the Watchtower (8h, Radiant B.S. Station) (only if activated before April 9th update) Characters: Shiva, Santa Claus, Gautama Buddha, Jack Frost, Jesus Christ, Kwanzaa Dr. Hibbert, Rabbi Krustofsky Quest reward: 100 and 10

Chestnuts Roasting on a Tire Fire

After tapping on Lisa's exclamation mark: It's nice that Mayor Quimby made the Springfield Tire Fire look festive, but isn't he just trying to distract us from the fact that he still hasn't put it out? Oh, honey, I would never fall for such an obvious trick. Who wants s'mores? I'm handing out free marshmallows. Ooh, ooh, me! Throw another couple tires on the fire! Task: Make Homer Enjoy S'mores (4h, Tire Fireplace) Quest reward: 100 and 10

Krusty's Kristmas Makes a Komeback

After tapping on Krusty's exclamation mark: Now opening: a festive holiday show to put you in the Christmas spirit. No kid will be able to say no. So make sure you charge them double. Krusty, surely you are not Scrooging?! This arena should bring holiday cheer, not jeers! "Cheer" doesn't buy fresh tiger milk, and that's the only thing that soothes my shaving rash. Now, get on your skates. You're on in five! Task: Make Krusty Prepare for a Show (8h, Krusty's Kristmas on Ice) Quest reward: 100 and 10