Lady Bouvier's Lover/Quotes
Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
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102
"Lady Bouvier's Lover"
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- Patty: Hello, everyone except Homer.
- Jacqueline: [touching Maggie's nose] Happy birthday, granddaughter.
- Patty: Marge, I think that's your father-in-law across the street.
- Grampa: Happy birthdaaay!
- Marge: Homie, you know it's funny... Both my mother and your father seem pretty lonely.
- Homer: [giggles] That is funny.
- Marge: Yeah. Anyway, maybe they could go to a matinee together... or shopping or to that room in the library... that's always full of old people—Periodicals, that's it!
- Homer: Marge, please, old people don't need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use.
- Marge: Homer, would you please stop reading that Ross Perot pamphlet? [snatches pamphlet and crumples it]
- Homer: Oh!!
- Homer: If he marries your mother, Marge, we'll be brother and sister ... and then our kids – they'll be horrible freaks with pink skin, no overbites, and five fingers on each hand! [he sees what he said] AAAAGH!!
- Bart: Is this cel worth anything?
- Comic Book Guy: [sighs] Let me show you something. This – this is a Snagglepuss drawn by Hig Heisler; it is worth something. This, this is an arm drawn by nobody – it is worth nothing!
- Bart: Can't you give me anything for it?
- Comic Book Guy: I can give you this telephone – it is shaped like Mary Worth.
- Bart: Ohh ...
- Comic Book Guy: No groaning in my store.
- [after exiting the community center ...]
- Jacqueline: I swear, Monty, you are the devil himself.
- Mr. Burns: I—who told you—?! Oh-ho-ho, I, yes, yes, well, I'd say you're an angel, but angels don't dance like that.
- Homer/Marge: AAAAAAGH!!!
- Mr. Burns: Hello. Why, it's – It's, er ... Oh, it's, er ...
- [goes back to a jealous Smithers. Smithers whispers and smiles mischief-ly when Burns returns]
- Mr. Burns: Why, it's Fred Flintstone and his lovely wife Wilma! Oh, and this must be little Pebbles. [pats Maggie] Mind if I come in? I've brought chocolates.
- Homer: [yanks box] Yabba dabba do!
- Marge: Mom, you can't marry Mr. Burns! He's an evil man!
- Jacqueline: Evil, schmevil, Marge. Monty can provide for me. Besides, he's a great kisser.
- Homer: Eww, yuck!
- Marge: Mm, what about Abe Simpson? Don't you have any feelings for him?
- Jacqueline: Oh, he's a dear. But he's too much of an old fusspot.
- Marge: We're all aware of Grampa's problems, but compared to Mr. Burns, he's Judge-freaking-Reinhold!
- Jacqueline: [pause] I don't know who that is.
