All My Sober Ladies
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Tapped Out Quest Information
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All My Sober Ladies is a premium questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the Soccer Cup 2015 part of the Tap Ball content update. It requires Lady Duff to be obtained.
Dialogue[edit]
After tapping on Lady Duff's exclamation mark
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Hey, girls! Haven't you ever wished there was beer just for us ladies?
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A smooth-drinking brew, lady-filtered from the freshest female hops and she-barley?
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Yes! This is all I've ever wished for!
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You mean I can finally get drunk too, just like the fellas?
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As drunk as you like, sister! Passing out on the barbeque isn't just for the guys anymore.
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It's time for women to stand up and demand equal inebriation.
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Finally! A transparent, meaningless beer-marketing campaign that's aimed at me!
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Task: "Make The Women Of Springfield Get Drunk" (x10). The jobs take place at Moe's Tavern and take 12 hours.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark
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My Lady Duff marketing tie-in is a huge success! Every woman in Springfield is partying down 24/7!
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Now to celebrate with a nice, home-cooked meal.
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Oh, Marge! Marge, my beautiful wife! I give you permission to cook for me!
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She's at Moe's with all the other ladies, you dummy.
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Are you saying that my marketing genius has cost me the woman who is entirely responsible for my care and feeding?
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THESE HARD-PARTYING LADIES MUST BE STOPPED! EVERYONE, TO MOE'S AT ONCE!
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I'm a kid. I can't go to a bar.
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WHEN I SAY "EVERYONE, TO MOE'S!" I MEAN "EVERYONE, TO MOE'S!"
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Task: "Make Lady Duff Promote Lady Duff". The job takes place at Moe's Tavern and takes 4 hours. Task: "Make Homer Confront Lady Duff". The job takes place at Moe's Tavern and takes 8 hours.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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After tapping on Lady Duff's exclamation mark
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Drink up, Duffettes! For too long, you have stood silently by while your men ruined their health and brains with beer. Now it's our turn!
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Everyone, put down your beers! At least one gender needs to remain sober, and it's not going to be men!
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Chill out, handsome. Guys can still enjoy the beer lifestyle.
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Homie, I finally understand the appeal of Moe's Tavern! Dance with me!
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No, Marge! Don't you see? You're falling for slick advertising. Beer doesn't make you cooler, or sexier. It only does that for guys!
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Whoa! We're not going to listen to that, are we, gals? Keep partying! Keep partying forever!
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OH YEAH!!!!!!!
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Wait a second...
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Task: "Make Lisa remove Lady Duff's Wig". The job takes place at Moe's Tavern and takes 6 seconds.
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Lady Duff isn't even a woman. She's a Duffman!
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That doesn't mean us girls... er, you girls... have to stop lady-partying, does it? Ah, I suppose it does.
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See, Dad? I told you that if you let Tap Ball become just another way to sell advertising, you'd cheapen it.
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You're right. Tap Ball has become a total joke. And yet, somehow it's still way better than your precious soccer.
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Oh yeah? Well in that case, the women in this town challenge the men to a game of soccer!
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I'm... not ENTIRELY sure how that follows from our previous discussion.
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Could pad this quest out with a few more missions, I guess. Very well, then. YOU'RE ON!!!
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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After tapping on Lisa's exclamation mark
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Okay, women. It's time to show those men who's boss!
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Might I point out that we're all still a little drunk?
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If you can teach my class after you've been drinking, you can play soccer!
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You know about that?
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Yes, and it's something we should talk about. But not now! Let's make those men rue the day they challenged us!
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But YOU challenged THEM. And I'm still not sure of the logic behind it all...
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Neither am I. It just kind of slipped out. But I'm still kind of angry for whatever reason, so... LET'S GET 'EM!
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Task: "Make Men Play Soccer" (x11). The jobs take place at Springfield Elementary and take 60 minutes. Task: "Make Women Play Soccer" (x11). The job takes place at Springfield Elementary and takes 60 minutes.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
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After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark
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I can't believe we lost 34-0.
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Well, we didn't exactly get many calls. I didn't know soccer had a penalty called "icing."
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You know what? It doesn't! I think this contest was rigged!
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Task: "Make Lisa Eavesdrop On Shady Dealings". The job takes place at Springfield Elementary and takes 12 hours.
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Coach Krupt, thanks for rigging the game for us. You're a spectacularly crooked referee.
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I'll be taking my payment now...
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Here you go. One Bombardment ball.
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Oh, yes. Yes oh yes oh yes. Come to Papa, sweet ball. BOMBARDMENT!!!!!
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Dad! You cheated! How could you?
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It all starts with wanting to win. Then, you throw in a little lack of moral fiber, and sprinkle liberally with having no class whatsoever.
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Stir it all together and presto! You get a guy who's willing to sink to a new low, just to beat his daughter at a sport he hates!
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Quest reward: 200 and 20
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Behind the Laughter[edit]
The quest name is a reference to the song "Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It)" by Beyoncé.