Mayored to the Mob/Quotes
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- Mark Hamill: Homer... Use the for--
- Homer: The Force?
- Mark Hamill: The forks! Use the forks!
- Neil Armstrong: [to his publicist, regarding his lack of popularity at the convention] This is one small stop towards firing your ass!
- Mayor Quimby: You call yourselves bodyguards? You're fired!
- Ernie: Fired, huh? Who else you gonna find to take a bullet for ya?
- Big Tom: Or have his genitals hooked up to a car battery?
- Quimby: I'll tell ya who! Him! [points to Homer, standing with his family]
- Homer: Woo-hoo!
- Marge: Homer, I don't think you were listening to what he just--
- Homer: [sternly] I said, woo-hoo.
- [Leavelle pretends to fire a rifle at a watermelon on a podium. Homer dives in front of the bullet's path.]
- Homer: Nooo!
- [Homer tumbles to the ground and Leavelle walks over.]
- Leavelle: Well. your dive wasn't bad, but I just didn't believe your "Nooo!" You gotta sell it! Remember, your "Nooo!" is what gets you your next job. Now drop and give me twenty.
- Homer: [dramatically] NOOOOOO!!!!
- Leavelle: Better.
- Marge: Oh, for Pete's sake.
- Homer: [into walkie-talkie] The pig is in the poke.
- Marge: You know, I really don't care for that code-name.
- Homer: Look out, Marge! Cat! [tackles Marge to the ground, sending oranges rolling]
- Marge: I know you're excited about starting a new job, but could you just... relax for now?
- Homer: [to Bart and Lisa] Hold it, What's your clearance?
- Bart: We just wanna get a snack
- Homer: Access denied.
- Bart: But dad-- [Homer pinches Bart and Lisa in the shoulder and sending into the floor asleep]
- Marge: Homer, I don't wanna you using your new sleeper holder on the children.
- Homer: They'll be fine in half an hour.
- Marge: [scoffs] That's not the point that's not the point. And another thing, I asked you to take out the garbage three days ago, and you still haven't--- [Homer pinches her in the shoulder sending her into the floor asleep]
- Homer: [looking at a sleeping Marge, Bart and Lisa and looks at his watch] Hmm. Still half an hour till dinner. Oh well. [pinches himself in the shoulder and fells into the floor and hits the table] OW!
- [Homer slaps the milk out of Bart's hands.]
- Bart: Hey my Milk! I traded my math book for that!
- Lisa: Dad what a nice surprise [attempts to kiss him]
- Homer: Get that away from me! Kids I don't wanna you drinking anymore milk! Ever!
- Fat Tony: I don't get it. Everyone loves rats, but they don't wanna drink the rats' milk?