Midnight Towboy/Quotes
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- [Bart uses an exact-o knife to extract the word "whore" from the Bible and he pins it up on his bulletin board along with a few others.]
- Bart: We can say these swears any time we want because they're in the Bible!
- Milhouse: I don't think "Leviticus" is a swear.
- Bart: Shut the hell up, you damn ass whore!
- Homer: When you married a man who would years later, without warning, become a tow-truck driver, you knew what the deal would eventually be.
- Carl: It sure is nice not having Homer around to tell us where we can and can't park.
- Lenny: Yeah. Without the crushing rule of law, society will do a better job of regulating itself.
- Bed Time Krusty Doll: Don't let the bed bugs bite! Krusty's anti-bed bug spray sold separately; may contain poison.
- [Homer celebrates his new job, while at Moe's.]
- Homer: I've got tow dough I'm lookin' to blow, Moe.
- [Homer spreads some money on the bar.]
- Moe: Huh?
- Homer: I'm buying a round of the fanciest drink you got.
- Moe: Four Lobster-politans comin' up.
- Ned Flanders: Top of the mornin', Tow-mer.
- Homer: It's Homer, idiot.
- Ned Flanders: [chuckles] So it is. I'm just here to pay the fine for the Sunday School bus. You towed it with the kids still in it.
- Homer: [chuckles] I guess I'm more powerful than God now.
- Ned Flanders: You know what they say: "With great power comes great responsibility."
- Homer: Who said that?! I'll kill them with my power!
- Marge: Bart, I'm starting to worry about your father.
- Bart: Well, I know he seems to get dumber every year, but lately he's plateaued.
- [Maggie is using scissors to cut a bit of her hair off and put it in a scrapbook.]
- Marge: Oh, Maggie is getting so independent at least you still need me sack of potatoes. [starts to cry.]
- [Homer drops a glass bottle of milk.]
- Homer: What the....spilt milk! [starts crying.]
- [Marge, Bart and Lisa all look at Homer.]
- Homer: [sobbing] All over the floor!
