Treehouse of Horror II/Quotes
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042 "Treehouse of Horror II"
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- Marge: Homer, where'd you get the monkey's paw?
- Homer: I got it from the stand... over... there.
- [Points to an empty space. A gust of wind is blowing sand around.]
- Homer: Oh, wait. It's over there.
- Merchant: You will be sorry.
- Kodos: They constructed a board with a nail in it, but they won't stop there. They'll construct bigger boards with bigger nails, and then they'll construct a board with a nail in it so large, it will destroy them all...
- [Bart has just turned Homer into a Jack-in-the-Box. Marge enters the room.]
- Marge: BART!
- Bart: Lisa did it.
- Marge: That's it, young man! You're coming with me!
- [Bart glares at Marge.]
- Marge: [smiling nervously and waving] Please?
- [Mr. Burns has kicked the robot, causing it to fall and crush him.]
- Mr. Burns: Have trouble breathing... organs leaking vital fluids... Smithers... I am going to die.
- Smithers: No! Cannot anything be done?!
- Mr. Burns: We have one chance. Go to my office... open the desk... third drawer... there is some ether.
- Homer: [wakes up and screams]
- Marge: Did you have a nightmare, Homey?
- Homer: No, Bart bit me.
- Bart: Hey, man, you were crushing me. I tried to scream, but my was full of flab.
- [Homer awakens and enters bathroom. He turns on light to see a scary reflection in mirror.]
- Homer: AUGH!
- Mr. Burns: Perhaps you are curious as to why you have two heads. Well, my body was crushed, so I had my head grafted onto your, shall we say, ample frame.
- Homer: [trying to stay calm] I can wake up. It's all a dream. It's just a dream.
- Mr. Burns: Oh, that's right. It's all a dream... Or is it? [laughs diabolically] [Executive Producer credit appears]
- [Fade to black, then Simpsons jingle plays.]
- Narrator: Next week, on The Simpsons...
- [Kitchen. Simpson family is eating breakfast.]
- Lisa: [puts down the newspaper] Don't forget, Dad, tonight my class is an all-you-can-eat spaghetti dinner.
- Homer: Mmm... spaghetti.
- Mr. Burns: [his head attached to Homer's shoulder] But Homer, tonight's reception for Queen Beatrix of The Netherlands!
- Homer: Oh, I hate having two heads.