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Krusty the Hair Colorist

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Revision as of 11:34, May 30, 2024 by Solar Dragon (talk | contribs) (Created page with "{{Tapped Out Quest |name = Krusty the Hair Colorist |image = |level = 42 |update = {{TOCU|Level 42}} |requirements = |characters = Krusty, Milhouse, Judge Snyder...")
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Krusty the Hair Colorist
Tapped Out Quest Information
Level: 42
Update: Level 42
Required characters: Krusty, Milhouse, Judge Snyder
Optional characters: Blue-Haired Lawyer
Previous quest(s): Islands in the Revenue Stream Pt. 4
Next quest(s): Islands in the Revenue Stream Pt. 9

Krusty the Hair Colorist is a questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the Level 42 content update.

Dialogue

Pt. 1

After tapping on Krusty's exclamation mark
Krusty - Angry Stupid Blue-Hairs! This is what I get for trusting those types of people. Always trying to crook away your money.
Milhouse Mr. the Clown, I know I see you all the time, but can I have another autograph?
Milhouse - Sad I keep having to give them away to bullies so they don't steal my retainer.
Krusty - Angry Scram, you worthless blue-haired kid. And don't you even think of putting your toe into a Krusty Burger.
Krusty - Angry You're banned! All Blue-Hairs are banned!
Krusty Huh. I never knew bigotry was this emotionally satisfying. I think I finally get the South.
Task: "Make Krusty Block Blue-Hairs from Krusty Burger". The job takes place at a Krusty Burger and takes 3 hours.
Krusty Nothing blocks people from entering a building like juggling.
Krusty This is the perfect revenge. There's no way this act of bigotry doesn't work out great for me.
Quest reward: Cash100 and XP10

Next Quest: Islands in the Revenue Stream Pt. 5

Pt. 2

Previous Quest: Islands in the Revenue Stream Pt. 6
After tapping on Krusty's exclamation mark
Krusty - Angry These shifty Blue-Hairs are rotting this city from the inside.
Krusty - Angry It's time we deal with this problem using good old fashioned 20th century methods. Like they use in Arizona.
Krusty I've already banned them from Krusty Burger.
Krusty Now to use my powerful connections in City Hall to lobby for a Blue-Hair ID program, Blue-Hair-only bathrooms, and eventually Blue-Hair deportation.
Krusty I'm stepping up this discrimination from de facto to de jure.
Task: "Make Krusty Discriminate Against Blue-Haired People". The job takes place at the Town Hall and takes 5 hours.
Quimby There is absolutely no way, erm, I can do what you want, Krusty. It's plainly illegal and immoral.
Quimby When a Quimby won't take your bribe, you know you've crossed a line.
Krusty I just want to treat certain people as second-class citizens, based solely on the color of their hair. How can that be wrong?
Quimby No politician can win an election if he's associated with hair colorism, even an election he fixed.
Krusty - Sad But D-Joe, they took Itchy & Scratchy from me.
Krusty - Angry You have to help me dehumanize these people. It's the only way I can get everyone to stop thinking of them as human!
Quest reward: Cash100 and XP10

Next Quest: Islands in the Revenue Stream Pt. 7

Pt. 3

Previous Quest: Islands in the Revenue Stream Pt. 8
After tapping on Milhouse's exclamation mark.
Milhouse Mr. the Clown, I know you hate my kind, but can you sign one last autograph? And then initial pages 3, 5, 8, and 9?
Krusty - Angry How did you get in here, Blue-Hair?!
Krusty - Sad *sigh* Never hire a monkey to run your security.
Blue-Haired Lawyer Krusty, this here is a class-action lawsuit for your blatantly discriminatory service policy.
Blue-Haired Lawyer You can't keep people out of Krusty Burger based on the color of their hair.
Blue-Haired Lawyer Only on the content of their character… as evidenced by a lack of shirt and/or shoes.
Krusty - Sad You can sue someone for being a bigot?! There's no chance I can beat a lawsuit. This town only has one lawyer.
Moleman I'll be your Perry Mason, Krusto. I got a JD when someone flushed theirs into the sewer.
Krusty - Angry This degree is from Dartmouth. I think I'm better off representing myself.
Task: "Make Milhouse Take Krusty to Court". The job takes place at the Court House and takes 4 hours.
Task: "Make Judge Snyder Preside Over Court Session". The job takes place at the Court House and takes 4 hours.
If Blue-Haired Lawyer is owned: Task: "Make Blue-Haired Lawyer Prosecute Krusty". The job takes place at the Court House and takes 4 hours.
After the jobs have started
Blue-Haired Lawyer Today I will show this court that Krusty not only discriminated against Blue-Hair-Americans like my client and myself, but also his own father!
Blue-Haired Lawyer For as this picture shows, Rabbi Hyman Krustofsky was born with blue hair!
Judge Snyder DUNT DUNT DUN!
Krusty - Sad Oh no, Papa! How I have slandered and disgraced you!
Blue-Haired Lawyer Once again, you've been Blue-Haired Lawyered!
After the quest is complete.
Krusty My mother was born with yellow hair, my father with blue, and that adds up to me having green hair.
Krusty It seems so obvious once I say the chromatic structure out loud.
Blue-Haired Lawyer Krusty, you can hand my client your entire net worth in either bags marked with dollar signs or chests full of coins made of gold.
Milhouse Oh Mr. Lawyer, I don't want any money.
Blue-Haired Lawyer SHUH-WHUT?!
Milhouse All I want is for Krusty to go back to showing Itchy & Scratchy.
Judge Snyder Well, I have no legal right to force one private company to work with another private company… but I just can't resist the wish of a child.
Judge Snyder Blue-Haired Lawyer, get Itchy & Scratchy back on the air!
Quest reward: Cash100 and XP10