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Jingle Bell Wreck

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Jingle Bell Wreck
Tapped Out Quest Information
Level: 6
Update: Winter 2014
Required characters: Homer, Lisa, Mr. Burns, Santa Claus
Optional characters: See Pt. 12

Jingle Bell Wreck is an event-exclusive questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the Winter 2014 content update.

Dialogue

Pt. 1

After starting the update
Quimby People of Springfield!
Quimby Over the years I have made many promises, most of them contradictory, few of them kept.
Quimby God bless you, voter apathy.
Quimby But today I am proud to deliver on one promise: new jobs.
Quimby Because Santa is opening a new toy workshop right here in Springfield!
Santa Claus Thanks to global warming, the ice under my old workshop at the North Pole melted, and everything sank into the Arctic Ocean.
Santa Claus - Sad It was a terrible catastrophe. Many holiday favorites died, including Frosty and Rudolph.
Lisa - Shocked I've been warning people about the threat global warming posed to Santa for years, but no one listened!
Lisa - Annoyed But why come to Springfield?
Santa Claus - Happy The tax incentives! You're practically paying me to move here.
Homer Finally someone takes the bait.
Homer All the other corporations backed out once they learned how Springfield workers lead the nation in sullen incompetence.
Santa Claus Oh. Well, no matter. Everyone works hard for jolly old Saint Nick, because making presents isn't work, it's play!
Santa Claus - Thinking But you better double those incentives, Quimby.
Quimby Done, Claus.
Task: "Build Toy Workshop". It takes 12 hours.
Build: Toy Workshop
Quest reward: Cash100 and XP10

Pt. 2

After completing Pt. 1
Santa Claus - Happy Ho, ho, ho! That's a fine looking workshop.
Santa Claus - Happy We don't have much time until Christmas, so we'd better get started.
Santa Claus Now, who'd like to come and make toys for me?
Homer - Happy All of us.
Homer I mean, we all already have jobs, but when something weird like this happens, we drop all that to participate in the latest thing.
Santa Claus - Happy Excellent! Then everyone pick a favorite toy they'd like to make.
Moe Eyeball gouger!
Santa Claus - Sad That's not a toy.
Moe Right, right. Ice pick sharpener?
Santa Claus How about you stuff teddy bears.
Moe Yeah! I'll stuff their guts in right through their filthy little belly button holes!
Santa Claus - Sad You know what, the position's been filled.
Task: "Make Homer Make Sergeant Activity Dolls". The job takes place at the Toy Workshop and takes 4 hours.
Task: "Make Lisa Make Musical Instruments". The job takes place at the Toy Workshop and takes 4 hours.
Quest reward: Present.png100 and XP10

Pt. 3

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark
Santa Claus - Worried Homer! Look at this Sergeant Activity doll you just made. It's got a Malibu Stacy head.
Homer I'm sorry, I wasn't paying attention. I was wondering what's on the lunch menu at the cafeteria.
Santa Claus It's always cookies and milk, except on Wednesday's there's gingerbread house.
Homer Hey, who are those cute little guys?
Santa Claus Elves, of course.
Santa Claus Thanks to my Springfield employees, I'm already behind schedule, so I asked a few elves to come help out.
Lisa They're adorable! But where do they come from?
Santa Claus They live in secret underground caves, where they laugh and play and occasionally kidnap human babies.
Task: "Place The Elf Cave".
Place: Elf Cave
Quest reward: Present.png100 and XP10

Pt. 4

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark
Homer - Happy Ooh, this is fun! I'm in charge of the elves.
Santa Claus Exactly the opposite. Meet Bismuth and Leopold.
Santa Claus They're top-level elf efficiency experts, and they're here to get some kind of order into my toy production.
Homer Aw, they're the cutest bosses I've ever had!
Happy Little Elf Bismuth - Shouting Get to work, slacker!
Happy Little Elf Leopold - Shouting Or you'll regret it!
Homer - D'oh Ouch! They're whipping me with the toe coils of their elf slippers!
Task: "Make Homer Get Bossed Around by Elves". The job takes place at the Toy Workshop and takes 12 hours.
Quest reward: Present.png100 and XP10

Pt. 5

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark:
Santa Claus Whew. We finished our first week of work.
Santa Claus I won't say it hasn't been a little rocky, but I'm still hoping for a pretty good Christmas.
Santa Claus Now, here's your paycheck.
Homer - Surprised Hey, this isn't money... it's candy canes!
Santa Claus - Thinking But I always pay in candy canes. The elves love them. Although their teeth are basically one giant cavity.
Homer - Angry Look, pal, I need real money to buy the necessities of life, like beer and lottery tickets.
Homer - Happy Until you pony up some cold hard cash, I'm going on strike.
Task: "Make Homer Go on Strike". The job takes place at the Toy Workshop and takes 24 hours.
Santa Claus Okay, okay. Look, I'll take money out of my retirement account and pay you.
Santa Claus - Worried Just means I'll have to keep working a few more centuries.
Santa Claus Probably would've just got bored playing golf in Laguna Beach, am I right?
Santa Claus Without work, life has no meaning, eh Homer?
Homer - Mouth Full Wouldn't know. Now that I'm off striking I'm on break.
Quest reward: Present.png100 and XP10

Pt. 6

After tapping on Lisa's exclamation mark:
Santa Claus - Thinking Lisa, why so glum?
Lisa You know how you put me in charge of making up the lists of who's naughty or nice?
Lisa Well, to handle this town, you're going to need a lot more lumps of coal.
Lisa Like 200 metric tons more.
Santa Claus - Worried Kringlenuts! Now I'm going to need even more elves. And they hate mining.
Lisa - Annoyed That makes no sense. They live in caves.
Santa Claus - Worried Yeah, well someone didn't think this story line out very well.
Task: "Make Lisa Compile Lists of Naughty and Nice Kids". The job takes place at the Toy Workshop and takes 12 hours.
Quest reward: Present.png100 and XP10

Pt. 7

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark:
Happy Little Elf Bismuth - Shouting Hurry up, Homer! You're working too slowly.
Happy Little Elf Leopold You're holding up the bicycle assembly line for the other elves.
Homer - Scared But they work so fast, and they look so happy.
Happy Little Elf Bismuth - Shouting Because the tinkling of the bells on their hats fills them with joy.
Homer - Sad Well it's driving me crazy.
Homer - Angry This toy shop sucks. I'm being insulted by elves, and I'm doing the thing a father hates the most...
Homer - Sad Assembling toys before Christmas.
Homer I'm going back to the nuclear plant!
Task: "Reach Level 11 and Build Control Building".
Task: "Make Homer Do a Plant Shift". The job takes place at the Control Building and takes 16 hours.
Quest reward: Present.png100 and XP10

Pt. 8

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark:
Mr. Burns Simpson, welcome back to the nuclear plant.
Homer - Dreamy I am so glad to be out of that magical toy shop and back in the real world of extreme nuclear danger.
Mr. Burns There's been a few changes. I've hired a couple of efficiency experts with a lot of great ideas.
Happy Little Elf Bismuth - Shouting Get to work, slacker!
Happy Little Elf Leopold - Shouting Or you'll regret it!
Homer - D'oh Ouch! They're beating me with the bells on their elf hats.
Mr. Burns When you're done with that, here's your paycheck.
Homer - Scared Candy canes?!
Task: "Make Mr. Burns Pay Plant Workers in Candy Canes". The job takes place at the Control Building and takes 12 hours.
Task: "Make Homer Get Bossed Around by Elves". The job takes place at the Control Building and takes 12 hours.
Quest reward: Present.png100 and XP10

Pt. 9

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark:
Homer - Angry Stupid Santa and his stupid elves, always picking on me.
Lisa There do seem to be a lot of them around the town.
Lisa - Alarmed They're even printing Elvish on the road signs and ATMs.
Homer - Angry I hate them, with their work ethic, and their taking jobs no one here wants and their sneaking in through tunnels.
Apu Homer, does that remind you of anything?
Homer - Dreamy Tunnel... rhymes with funnel... funnel cake?
Apu I was suggesting that if you have a problem with annoying immigrants, you might want to tip off Homeland Security.
Homer - Happy Of course. They must have funnel cake!
Task: "Make Homer Call Homeland Security". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 60 minutes.
Quest reward: Present.png100 and XP10

Pt. 10

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark
Russ Cargill Russ Cargill, head of Homeland Security here.
Russ Cargill So, Homer, you have a problem with illegal immigration, and you'd like us to clean them out?
Homer Yes.
Russ Cargill Catch all the elves that are making presents for children.
Homer Yup.
Russ Cargill Lock them up in detention centers for years.
Homer Okay.
Russ Cargill Separate them from their wives, families, jobs, everything that makes life worth living.
Homer - Thoughtful Well... maybe not that.
Russ Cargill Too late! You never had a choice. My agents are on their way.
Homer - Scared Oh, why do the bad things I do always make me feel bad?
Task: "Make Homer Regret his Selfishness". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 16 hours.
Quest reward: Present.png100 and XP10

Pt. 11

After tapping on Lisa's exclamation mark
Lisa - Shocked Santa, what's wrong? You've been crying so hard, there's icicles in your beard..
Santa Claus - Sad It's over, Lisa. Christmas is over.
Santa Claus - Sad All I wanted was to bring joy to children.
Santa Claus - Sad But thanks to Homer, I'm hopelessly behind on production, my elves are being deported, and I'm broke.
Lisa - Deadpan It's not entirely his fault. You're the one who decided to relocate to Springfield.
Santa Claus - Sad Well, I've had it. I quit!
Santa Claus - Sad If you need me, I'll be at Moe's getting blitzed out of my mind.
Moe Another broken down old drunk comes to Moe's.
Moe Looks like Christmas came early for me.
Task: "Reach Level 15 and Build Moe's Tavern".
Task: "Make Santa Get Drunk at Moe's". The job takes place at Moe's Tavern and takes 8 hours.
Quest reward: Present.png100 and XP10

Pt. 12

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark
Lisa - Shocked Dad, we have to save Christmas!
Lisa We'll keep making presents and protecting the elves from deportation.
Lisa But someone's got to convince Santa not to give up.
Homer - Sarcastic Don't worry, Lisa. I'll talk him out of it even if I have to guzzle beers at Moe's from now until Christmas.
Homer - Happy It's a sacrifice I'm willing to make.
Message Will Christmas come? Make sure you come back on December 23 to see how this story turns out!
Task: "Make Springfielders Make Toys" (x10). The jobs take place at the Toy Workshop and take 4 hours.
Task: "Make Elves Make Toys" (x100).
Quest reward: Present.png100 and XP10

Characters that can do the "Make Toys" task are:

Homer, Hank Scorpio, Professor Frink, Squeaky Voice Teen, Lisa, Moleman, Otto, Barney, Apu, Ned, Milhouse, Willie, Bart, Rev. Lovejoy, Marge

Pt. 13

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark on December 23
Lisa - Happy We did it!
Lisa - Happy We made all the presents just in time for Christmas Eve!
Bart Yeah, but who's gonna deliver them? Santa's drunk out of his mind at Moe's.
Homer No! Don't you see what this whole story has been leading up to?
Homer - Happy I'll be Santa!
Homer I'll bring presents to the children! I'll redeem myself for my terrible misbehavior!
Bart Yeah! Maybe you could be Santa. You're fat and you never work more than one day of the year.
Homer Tell all the world Homer Claus is coming. And to leave out beer and donuts.
Task: "Make Homer Dress as Santa". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 60 minutes.
Quest reward: Present.png100 and XP10

Pt. 14

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark
Homer Okay, I'm ready to bring joy to the world. Load up the sleigh with presents.
Happy Little Elf Bismuth Maybe you should take it on a test flight first.
Happy Little Elf Leopold It's a little squirrely at magical hypersonic speeds.
Homer Fine, doubters. On Dunder, on Mifflin!
Task: "Make Homer Try to Fly the Sleigh". The job takes place at the Toy Workshop and takes 4 hours.
Lisa The reindeer are trying as hard as they can, but the sled's not moving!
Bart Homer's too heavy.
Lisa But they can pull a sleigh loaded with presents and Santa, the fattest man in the world!
Bart I repeat, Homer's too heavy.
Dr. Hibbert That reindeer just tore its ACL! Call off the test.
Quest reward: Present.png100 and XP10

Pt. 15

After tapping on Lisa's exclamation mark
Lisa - Sad Well, so much for Dad being Santa.
Lisa - Sad I guess Springfield really did ruin Christmas.
Bart - Surprised Look! The real Santa is coming out of Moe's bar!
Bart He's going to deliver the presents!
Homer Is he sobered up?
Moe Nah, but I got him a designated driver.
Barney *BELCH* Where's the keys?
Task: "Make Santa Deliver Presents". The job takes place at the Toy Workshop and takes 8 hours.
Lisa - Happy So this story had a happy ending after all.
Dr. Hibbert Except for that reindeer Homer hurt.
Dr. Hibbert I think we're going to have to put it down.
Dr. Hibbert - Happy (CHUCKLES)
Quest reward: Present.png100 and XP10