| Splitting Hair
|
| Tapped Out Quest Information
|
Splitting Hair is a questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the Snow Place Like the Woods content update. It requires Lumberjill Marge to be obtained.
Dialogue[edit]
| After tapping on Marge's exclamation mark
|
|
Homer?
|
|
AAH! A ghost!
|
|
|
It's Marge. The power is out again.
|
|
|
Where are you?
|
|
|
Right in front of you.
|
|
|
Why do you feel funny? Kind of scratchier than normal...
|
|
|
*annoyed grumble* Just hold Maggie while I cut some wood for a fire.
|
|
|
Come here, Maggie. It's going to be okay.
|
|
*annoyed upside-down suck suck*
|
Task: "Make Lumberjill Marge Start a Fire". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 4 hours.
Task: "Make Homer Try to See in the Dark". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 4 hours.
|
|
There we go. A fire in the hearth. All toasty warm... Okay, Homer, I can take Maggie again.
|
|
Hey, I was going to change her diaper, but I didn't want to deny you mommy time with her.
|
|
*suck suck*
|
|
Marge, why are you wearing flannel?
|
|
With all these snowstorms and blackouts, I figure we should have some firewood handy for warmth and light.
|
|
|
But flannel? I mean...do we need to talk about how you're experimenting with a change of lifestyle?
|
|
|
Homer, our marriage is all the experimenting I can handle. Honestly, even Dr. Frankenstein wouldn't try it.
|
Quest reward:  100 and  10
|
|
| After tapping on Marge's exclamation mark
|
|
Homer, how much longer will these power blackouts keep on going?
|
|
|
Why are you asking me?
|
|
You work at the plant.
|
|
In that case, forever. I mean, I'm a horrible employee. Me and nuclear power...?
|
|
*explosion sound*
|
|
|
We need to think of something, then.
|
|
Having a beer always helps me think.
|
|
|
How does that help?
|
|
|
When I have one I can think of things other than "I want a beer". You want one?
|
|
|
No thanks. I can think without a beer.
|
|
Show off.
|
Task: "Make Lumberjill Marge Vent Her Frustrations". The job takes 4 hours.
Task: "Make Homer Sneak Out of the Room". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 4 hours.
|
|
|
*grumble grumble* Blackouts... *grumble grumble* Winter... *grumble grumble* Power plant...
|
|
I just went to the Kwik-E-Mart to get more Duff, because the ones in our fridge were all missing.
|
|
|
That happens a lot.
|
|
|
More evidence of our ghost problem.
|
|
Anyways, when I was there, I saw that Apu had bundles of firewood for sale. And people were buying them like crazy!
|
|
|
Why do I have a feeling that you have a brilliant plan that involves me doing all the work?
|
|
You have the same idea! Oh, Marge, we are two peas in a pod!
|
|
...
|
|
I think I'll have that beer now.
|
|
If I had any. Ghosts, Marge.
|
| Quest reward: 100 and 10
|
|
| After tapping on Marge's exclamation mark
|
|
|
Okay, Homer. How much firewood do you think we'll need to start?
|
|
Well, let's see. When I was at Apu's, I started taking orders...
|
|
|
Of course you did...
|
|
|
*looking at note pad* I got orders from Ned, Kirk, Dr. Hibbert... How many logs can you turn out in an hour?
|
|
|
I don't know. Maybe ten.
|
|
|
In a day?
|
|
|
Eighty or ninety.
|
|
|
We'll need a day in an hour.
|
|
|
*annoyed grumble*
|
Task: "Make Homer Count the Orders". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 4 hours.
Task: "Make Lumberjill Marge Start Stretching". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 4 hours.
|
|
|
...so we need something in the neighborhood of eighty bundles of lumber.
|
|
Eighty? That neighborhood's too rich for me.
|
|
|
Come on, Marge, you can do it. I believe in you.
|
|
|
And while I'm doing it what will you be doing?
|
|
|
I'll be right here, believing in you. Or in the hammock.
|
|
|
Homer, do you know how long that's going to take me to cut all this wood?
|
|
|
A lot longer if we keep talking. So come on, chop chop.
|
|
Don't push me.
|
|
Um, please...chop chop?
|
|
|
Okay, stand back. I need to do some stretching first...
|
|
|
Gotta be limber to lumber!
|
|
|
Or to strangle you.
|
|
...
|
| Quest reward: 100 and 10
|
|
| After tapping on Marge's exclamation mark
|
|
Okay, Homer. Eighty bundles of firewood...have been split. By me.
|
|
|
Good, because I told everyone that we'd guarantee delivery by nightfall. There's still some daylight for you to get all these out.
|
|
|
What! You expect me to deliver these? Homer, this is too much.
|
|
|
I know it's a lot, Marge, but I want you to be the face of our company. Honestly, what could my face sell? Maybe rash cream or fish intestines.
|
|
|
*exhales*
|
|
|
No, you're right. Okay, fine. I'll get these delivered.
|
| Task: "Make Lumberjill Marge Deliver Firewood". The job takes 4 hours.
|
|
|
Homer? I'm back.
|
|
|
Welcome home! Ned just sent over a Bible to thank us for the firewood. It burned up real good. Heavenly toasty.
|
|
|
Well, I'm done. Done. Done. Done.
|
|
|
Okay, we'll talk tomorrow about the new orders I got. This blackout is a goldmine.
|
|
*lights flicker on* Hey! The lights are back on!
|
|
Hurray. Damn.
|
|
|
Now turn them off. I'm going to sleep.
|
|
*snores*
|
| Quest reward: 200 and 20
|
|
